


What Once Was Broken is Now Gold

by HoneyButterYum



Series: Under Repair [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: American Sign Language, Amputation, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Begging, Biting, Blood and Violence, Blow Jobs, Choking, Cults, Domestic Fluff, Elijah Kamski & Gavin Reed are Siblings, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enthusiastic Consent, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, First Time, Fluff, Frottage, Gavin Reed Has a Praise Kink, Gavin Reed Redemption, Gavin cries, Gavin doesn't talk about his feelings because he's an absolute dumbass, Gavin is a kinky little shit, Gavin is a tsundere my bad, Gavin likes to think they’re enemies but he should know better, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, I lied when I said they started out as enemies, I'm gonna cry, Light Bondage, Loss of Limbs, M/M, Needles, Nines has a dick and doesn’t know what to do with it, Nines is strangely good at taking care of distressed detectives, Oral Sex, Panic Attacks, Post-Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), Post-Pacifist Best Ending (Detroit: Become Human), Praise Kink, Prosthetics, Protective Upgraded Connor | RK900, Self-Hatred, Semi-Public Sex, Slow Burn, So much begging, Spit As Lube, Spooning, Survivor Guilt, Teasing, Touch-Starved Gavin Reed, Undercover Missions, Voice Kink, accidental undercover missions, but it's gonna be fun, do I care? a lot :'), does it count as spit when technically it is actual lube, fuck how could I forget probably the most obvious tag until now, his name is Nines - Freeform, is Gavin OOC? possibly, like a lot, lol finally am i right, not all of this is depressing i promise, or as close to lube as analysis fluid can get, question mark?, with a little twist since RK900 is here, yeah this is gonna be fun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2019-08-22 10:05:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 64,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16595795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoneyButterYum/pseuds/HoneyButterYum
Summary: “My name is Gavin Reed,” he rasped into the recorder, glazed eyes staring up at the bare white ceiling, body numb from the amount of morphine in his blood. “And...I fucking lost my arm in a car accident."





	1. Empty

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't find fics about what prosthetics would be like in 2038 so I tortured Gavin to get what I wanted, y'all are welcome
> 
> also I have no idea how hospitals work I'm sorry

The first thing Gavin registered when he opened his eyes was the overwhelming numbness in his body. He could hardly turn his head to the side to get a look at the room he was in, though he knew he was alone and hooked up to an IV drip, the pressure of secure bandages all over his body. The tight, dull blue walls around him seemed to shrink for a moment, but then Gavin’s eyes refocused and the walls took a few steps back.

He tried to make some sort of sound, any sound really—preferably a swear—but found his throat too dry and tight to voice anything other than a pathetic groan.

The curtain to his room rustled as a figure peered inside, but left too fast for Gavin to focus on their face. Moments later, two figures stepped into his room, one clad in the same dull blue as his room’s walls. The other seemed dressed in something mostly white with bright blue specks that made Gavin squint, hissing at the intense light compared to the darkness of his room.

“Gavin?” the one in blue said, voice feminine, and Gavin knew he stared at her like a dumbass high on hallucinogens, but it helped him bring her dark face into focus. “Can you hear me? Blink twice if yes.”

Gavin forced out a sigh, it sounding more like a wheeze out his raw throat. He blinked twice.

“Good!” The nurse turned away from him, moving too quickly for Gavin to follow. Soon enough, she ended up back at his bedside. “Drink this. Try not to move too much, this’ll help soothe your throat.”

She lifted a paper cup to his lips at a gentle angle, Gavin unable to protest with how heavy his body felt. After a few long minutes, Gavin gulped down the last of the cool liquid, then laid his head back against his pillow and gasped out a single word: “Fuck.”

The nurse sighed. “Are you feeling better?”

“Shit,” Gavin croaked, eyes watering like he just got back from a checkup with the eye doctor. He wanted to wipe at the wetness, but his arms felt like lead at his sides. “I dunno.”

“That’s fine, just please try not to move.” The nurse checked his IV drip, then made sure he was comfortable in his hospital bed before placing a strange, stick-looking device in his left palm. “This is a voice recorder. Dr. Quinn will be here shortly to finish checking up on you and to tell you anything you want to know. She’ll give you more details about what to do with this when she comes in.”

Gavin tried to nod, eyes blinking long and slow. “‘Kay.” He followed the blob of blue as she left the room, wincing as he noticed the neon cerulean once more. “Ah, shit,” he hissed, squeezing his eyes shut. “Th’ fuck’re you?”

The silent white blob in the corner of the room stepped forward, and even without a face, Gavin could tell they were looking down on him in a sick sort of satisfaction. “I was meant to be assigned your partner,” they replied in a masculine monotone. “However, when I arrived at the police station, you were not there. Captain Fowler later informed me you had gotten into a near-fatal accident on your motorbike.”

Gavin hissed out another breath and furrowed his brow, glaring up at the unfamiliar man with a strangely familiar voice. He couldn’t place where he’d heard it before. “Partner?”

“Yes. It had been a secret from you until the last minute to ensure you couldn’t complain or try to get out of it.”

“Oh.” Gavin stared up at the ceiling, information circling in his head. “I can’t remember—?”

“Post-traumatic amnesia is common for such an accident, considering how often you drifted in and out of consciousness. Once you stabilize, perhaps you’ll remember what happened.”

Gavin nodded, then turned his gaze to the man, eyes trying to focus through the constant watering. “You said— It was near-fatal?”

The lines of the man’s face went into focus, but the finer details were still a blur. But the man nodded and said, “That information is better said by the doctor. I am…unfamiliar with transferring such delicate knowledge.”

“You talk like a bitch.” Gavin let out an exasperated groan and closed his eyes. “You’re gonna be a bitch of a partner…. What’s even your name?”

“Currently, I have not been registered one.” Gavin’s blood ran cold, but the…thing still kept talking. “I’ve been content to await your return before I choose. For now, I am RK900.”

In his shock, Gavin drowned out all sound save for the heart monitor too far to his right beeping far too fast.

He didn’t even register hands on his shoulders until his view of the…the android was blocked by a round face swathed in thin pink fabric. “Gavin? What’s wrong?” Dr. Quinn’s voice brought Gavin back to reality. His chest burned with both fear-turned-rage and lack of air.

“Get it out,” Gavin whispered, as though in fear it would hear him.

Dr. Quinn frowned, ignoring his request. “Gavin, what’s more important is that you remain calm. You’ve been hospitalized here for a while now, and this is the first time you’ve woken up.”

“What?” Gavin’s mouth went dry and heat rushed to his head that caused the room to spin. “What happened to me—?”

“Shh, Gavin, I need you to calm down before I can tell you more.” Dr. Quinn helped Gavin settle back in his bed and gave him a minute or so to just breathe. The heart monitor stabilized at an anxious rhythm.

Gavin gulped. “Just fuckin’ tell me what’s wrong. I can’t stand all this bullshit.”

Dr. Quinn drew her lips in a thin line and nodded. “Due to the crash between your motorbike and a semi, your right side became, for lack of a better term, mangled and deformed.”

Gavin nodded along, hearing the distant beeps of the heart monitor grow faster. “And?”

“Well….” Dr. Quinn drew in a deep, deep breath. The beeps became louder. “Most of your body suffered from bone breaks and fractures, internal bleeding, and of course severe external wounds.”

Okay, Gavin could work with that. “I’m guessing I was out for a while, then?”

Dr. Quinn nodded. “About four weeks.”

Gavin coughed, choked, eyes wide. “Four—? You’re shitting me, I was out for four fuckin’ _weeks?_ ”

From the side of the room, the RK900 spoke up. “You hit a semi, Detective—”

“Shut the fuck up, tin can,” Gavin snapped. He took a deep breath, then turned back to Dr. Quinn. “Alright, so I was out for a bit over a month. That’s fine, that’s cool. When do I get to leave?”

Dr. Quinn bit her lip, her fingers woven tight together in front of her. “A few more days so we can see how you’re stabilizing now that you’re awake.” She turned to the side, toward the RK900. “The nurse gave you a recording device, yes?” Gavin nodded. “I want you to record your own health through that device. Once a day should suffice, right before you go to bed. All its storage is on that device, and it isn’t linked to any of the hospital’s data records, so you don’t have to fear about a lack of privacy.”

“Okay, but what else aren’t you telling me?” Gavin stared hard at the doctor, the fuzzy lines of her fingers merging and twisting together faster than before.

Dr. Quinn pulled her hands apart and hid them behind her back. In a carefully constructed monotone, she replied, “You took the brunt of the damage solely on your right arm. It had been crushed and splintered, forcing the surgeons to remove it.” She looked down at Gavin’s gaping face, and finally Gavin could make out the details of her own expression: pity.

For a moment, Gavin heard nothing. There was a continuous ringing in his ears, and he clenched his hands, one around the recording device, the other against the sheets of his bed.

The edges of the recording device dug into his palm in a dull throb while he didn’t feel sheets under his right palm; no, instead he felt searing, agonizing pain.

Gavin let out a choked cry and bit it back before it could become a scream. The heart rate monitor gave off steady, rapid beeps that Gavin hyperventilated to, and Dr. Quinn stepped to the side to take out something from a small drawer.

“Y-you fuckin’ _amputated_ me?” Gavin glanced toward the doctor, could feel his chest burn and constrict in panic.

Dr. Quinn filled up a syringe, her expression calm yet stoic, as though this wasn’t the first time she’d dealt with an unwilling amputee. “We had to, Gavin,” she said as she came up to his side and placed her fingers on his numb, almost limp forearm. Gavin didn’t want to look to see how much he had left of his right one. “The bone had been shattered, it was like picking up shards of glass. It never would’ve healed properly, and if we let it try, you would’ve been in agony for the rest of your life.”

Gavin bit back a curse and instead let out a harsh snarl as Dr. Quinn inserted the needle into the soft flesh of his bicep. After a moment or so, his vision grew fuzzy once more, the once-crisp lines of Dr. Quinn’s face becoming a merge of colors: bronze, pink, blue.

And then, black.

When Gavin woke, the nauseating scent of steaming vegetables filled his nose. He tried not to gag as he forced through the grogginess to cover his mouth, but he felt nothing, his left hand still heavy as a rock, his right nonexistent.

Instead of shock or another outburst, all he felt was…numb disbelief. All the drugs in his system were probably to blame for that.

“Awake, Detective?” RK900’s voice drew Gavin back to reality.

“Fuck off,” Gavin garbled. He didn’t need this dumb android to babysit him. “What the fuck is that smell? I’m gonna puke….”

RK900 placed a small tray of food over Gavin’s lap and sat down in a stool next to the bed. “There is a bucket under the cabinet in case you do expel what little you have in your stomach; however, your nausea is not as severe as you’d like to believe.”

Gavin groaned, enduring the dumbass hunk of plastic talk. “Well, fuck, I haven’t been able to eat for a month. If I puke, it’s going all over you, tin can.”

RK900 hummed, face a blur, as he got up and retrieved the bucket from under the cabinet, then sat back on the stool. “Do you need help with that?”

“N-no!” Gavin tried to lift his left arm, but found every finger, save his thumb and ring finger, numb and frozen. Most of his arm, too, could barely move or even feel, one part of his elbow functioning like a normal part of his body, while everywhere else flopped and hung limp as Gavin tried lifting his arm out from under his blanket.

With a frustrated grunt, Gavin plopped his arm down on the tray. “Ha!” He grinned, then turned to smirk at RK900.

“Finishing one part of a task does not equal victory, Detective,” RK900 said, almost sly.

“Shut the fuck up.” But Gavin’s words didn’t hold the same bite as they’d had before. After a minute of Gavin contemplating how the fuck he’d lift a spoonful of food to his mouth, he decided to change the subject. “Hey, tin can,” he began, hesitant. “What…happened with all that android stuff, with that whole revolution?”

RK900 cocked his head, though Gavin couldn’t quite make out his expression. “It was a success. I could turn on the television if you’d like.”

Gavin swallowed his pride and nodded. “So, that makes you a deviant piece of plastic, huh?”

“Yes,” came the simple answer. “Though I have not been activated for long, emotions still…confuse me.”

“Ain’t that the truth.” Gavin turned his attention up to the TV hanging on the wall above the doorway. Unable to see that far away, he stared down at his plate, his nose assaulted with the smell of lukewarm veggies, soup, and crackers. He gulped, and to his surprise, didn’t protest when RK900 drew closer and took the spoon in hand to feed him.

They sat like that for a while, Gavin distracted by the news and the food that kept disappearing past his lips. His nausea forgotten, he now focused on the nagging in the back of his mind, the nagging that tightened a burn in his chest.

A semi had fucking slammed into him on his bike, and here he was, hardly even wearing any casts, just one on his right leg, the other hidden and numb beneath the blanket. He could blame the month he’d been out, but bones didn’t heal so fast where they’d be out of a cast by now.

Finally, Gavin tested a glance over at his right arm. The…stump ended at about the midway point of his bicep, the area covered in clean white bandages. Gavin gazed at his stump, mind blank, until the spoon at his lips startled his focus away.

“It’s almost nine o’clock,” RK900 said. “You should make your first record of your health and then go to sleep. Without the aid of drugs.”

Gavin ate the last of the soup, then nodded. Again, he didn’t complain when RK900 cleared his tray, then took out the recording device from his pocket. RK900 nudged Gavin down against the bed, then held the device up to Gavin’s lips.

“State your name before you give your report.” At Gavin’s nod, RK900 pressed a button on the device and lit up a small red bulb.

“My name is Gavin Reed,” he rasped into the recorder, glazed eyes staring up at the bare white ceiling, body numb from the amount of morphine in his blood. “And…I fucking lost my arm in a car accident.”

“And?” RK900 pressed, the edges of his face coming into focus.

“And…and that fuckin’ sucks.” Gavin bit back a choked sob. “I’d kill to be back at the DPD with dumbass Anderson and his dumbass plastic toy. But I’m stuck here, not even able to be alone, for who knows how much longer, and now I can’t—I can't shoot, I’ll probably lose my job, I…I….”

RK900 let him ramble on for a while longer before cutting in. “If the DPD no longer wanted your skills, I would not have been sent to monitor your condition. Nor would they have paid for all your hospital expenses.”

Gavin let out that choked sob he’d been holding back. “Yeah,” he whispered, voice cracking, “you’re right.” He sniffed, taking a moment to recognize how _pathetic_ he felt at that moment, but overcome with relief that he didn’t have to pay for all this out of pocket. He wasn’t sure he would have been able to afford it. “Don’t…tell anyone about how stupid I look right now, got it?” He tried to put some malice in his words, but he only heard dread.

RK900 nodded, and Gavin could focus enough to see the tiniest bit of yellow light come from his temple. “I understand that you have a reputation to uphold.” He grew quiet, then, reaching for the remote to the TV and switching off the screen. “I suggest you rest now. Tomorrow I’ll see if you can get some fresh air.”

“Yeah…. Yeah, okay.” Gavin took in a deep breath and turned his eyes up toward the blank, blank ceiling. He closed them, heard RK900 click off the recorder, then his fading footsteps as he walked out of the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh yeah my bad, I’ll try to not make this as OOC as I have lol, but then again, no promises
> 
> Either way, I hope you enjoyed this first chapter lol, I literally wrote this in one day which is a huge feat for me because I’ve had horrible writer’s block for the past few months but this seems to have gotten me back on my feet! Huge thanks to you for taking the time to read this!


	2. Fragment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It couldn’t quite be considered a panic attack if all he did was stare out the window in despair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i still can't write hospitals, now with the added bonus of me freaking out over possible prosthetic technologies

By the next day, Dr. Quinn started to wean Gavin’s body off the substantial amount of drugs they’d been using to keep him numb and placid. Gavin’s body ached from the newfound sensations, but he counted it as a small victory. He wasn’t sure he could handle it if he didn’t.

With the ability to move his limbs with more freedom, Gavin, of course, felt prickling phantom pains all across his right arm. He awoke in a cold sweat, time a mystery, with RK900 at his side and a glass of water and pain medication in hand. The android helped him swallow the pills in his delirious state, then drift back asleep, only to wake up again what felt like moments later.

“Ngh….” Gavin yawned, his pain a dull throb in the back of his consciousness. “What time ‘s it, tin can?”

He awaited a response, but none came. After a quick glance around the room, he heard a series of rapid beeps from the heart rate monitor as he realized he was alone.

But that was cool, that was fine. The dumb android probably went back to the DPD or something after checking he was well and good and yup, he sure was! That thing wasn’t even a nursing model or anything, he knew that much, so he’d just get in the way of the hospital staff. No big deal.

Gavin fumbled for the call button, but before he pressed it, RK900 emerged into the room with a tray of food in his arms. The android remained silent, staring at him long and cold. Scanning. Gavin grit his teeth and tried to relax back into his bed, RK900 finishing the journey to his side.

“What is it today?” Gavin asked, dumb for conversation though hating it all the same. He couldn’t look up at the android, hand gripping his blanket.

RK900 placed the tray over Gavin’s lap. “It’s the same meal as yesterday.”

Gavin drew out a long sigh, but couldn’t complain. At least today he could feed himself.

For some reason, his face seemed hotter than usual at that thought.

“Why are you still here?” he said, nervous, through a mouthful of food. “Shouldn’t you be, like, working or somethin’?”

RK900 seemed…hesitant. “Yes, you’re right. However, I felt it in both our best interests to get to know my future partner, especially during such a stressful event.”

Well, yeah, alright. “Cool,” Gavin mumbled past the spoon in his mouth. “Don’t feel like you’re obligated to stay here, though,” he added, a bit of a bite hidden in his tone. “I get it, you’re not programmed to do…whatever this is, so you don’t have to force yourself to be here if it’s just gonna be a waste of our time.”

“I’m not.” RK900’s voice, smooth and cool, cut through Gavin’s heated worry. “This is…the first thing I’ve ever wanted to do.”

That caused Gavin’s throat to close up, heat flaring from his face. “Don’t just fucking— God damn it.” He found himself turning his head down once more, away from RK900’s now less-fuzzy face. “I’m sure it’s really fuckin’ fun to look down on me like this, huh?”

“That is not what I’d meant,” RK900 said with a sigh. “My predecessor—RK800, or Connor—did share with me what you were like before your accident. Yet,” and at the android’s quiet huff, Gavin gathered enough courage to meet his sharp metallic gaze, almost…soft in this light, “that makes you all the more interesting.”

Gavin’s lips tried forming any amount of words, but none could crawl out of his throat. Once he composed himself enough to study the damned android’s stupid expression, he noticed RK900 had the smallest of smirks formed on his lips.

Oh, so this android thought he was funny, did he? Gavin growled, turning his embarrassment into anger. “I swear to God, the second I get outta here, I’m gonna set you on fire.”

RK900 stood up then, the barest of his facial details Gavin could see returning to a blur. “Would you prefer crutches or a wheelchair? I’d recommend the crutches.”

Gavin grit his teeth. “Well, then, I’ll take the wheelchair, asshole.”

He could feel RK900’s blank stare on him, then the android turned and exited the room. Moments later, he came back with a nurse pushing a wheelchair. The nurse didn’t say much as she transferred Gavin’s IV drip onto the chair, then helped him as much as he’d allow to get himself into the chair on trembling legs.

All at once, Gavin felt sick, a sickness that originated in his brain. He pressed his arm to his stomach, dragging his stiff fingers over the bumps of his ribs. He didn’t notice the nurse leave him in RK900’s care.

“Where do you wish to go?” the android asked as he grabbed the handles on the back of Gavin’s chair.

“Th-the blanket,” Gavin muttered. RK900 reached for the cloth and wrapped it around Gavin, hiding his nonexistent arm from sight. “Go…someplace quiet, with a window.”

RK900 hummed in response and pushed the chair out of the room. Gavin curled up as much as he could, vision swimming with light and stimuli.

“Close your right eye.” Gavin turned his head up toward RK900’s voice. “That should ease your headache, if only temporarily.”

Though doubtful, Gavin had nothing to lose. He did as the android asked, then stifled a gasp when the harsh light became clear, the people they walked past no longer blurring with action lines. “The hell…?”

“I shall explain when we arrive at our destination,” RK900 said, something like amusement hidden in his tone. Then, it finally clicked.

“You have Connor’s voice.” Gavin gulped. “That’s fucking creepy as hell.”

RK900 didn’t reply right away. “We have our differences. I am not a prototype, after all. But, yes, we are the same model, and thus would be similar in many ways.”

“Still….” Gavin trailed off as they came up to a large window in an empty white hallway. RK900 stepped away from the back of his wheelchair and stood by his side. Gavin looked up and, as he’d expected, saw Connor’s fucking face on that thing.

With a sigh, Gavin turned to look out the window. As he watched the gentle snowfall, he asked, “What’s the date today?”

“December 12, 2038.”

“Hm.” Gavin took in the low skyline before him, obstructed by buildings rising higher than the floor he was on. He allowed himself to think on what had happened, allowed his chest to constrict with the tight squeeze of anxiety that gave him. RK900 shifted beside him, but otherwise did not move.

It couldn’t quite be considered a panic attack if all he did was stare out the window in despair. His hand flew to grasp at his chest, to alleviate pain he didn’t want to stop. It distracted him from the numb tingles that came from the stump of his arm.

“You’ll have the latest of prosthetic technology,” RK900 murmured, and Gavin turned to him as he took slow, deep breaths, relishing the burn of the air in his lungs.

“So?” Gavin exhaled a shuddering breath. “Am I gonna be a fucking cyborg, then? Gonna have an arm like you?”

RK900’s LED spun blue with a hint of yellow. “You truly are an exceptional detective. Or just a lucky guesser.”

Gavin squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t want it.”

“It would be like you never lost your arm in the first place, Detective. Whether it’s made of flesh or plastic shouldn’t be a concern.”

“Maybe to you,” Gavin shot back. “You’re—you’re used to having different parts you need to replace whenever they break, but humans aren’t like that.”

“I know.”

“We got—we got one stupid life, we can’t just pick our parts and change ‘em.” Gavin opened his eyes, the light far too blinding once more. The snowfall outside looked more like white cracks rolling down the sky than the slow descent it was. Gavin’s next words were quiet, broken. “What’s up with my eyes?”

RK900 stepped forward into Gavin’s line of sight. “As the doctor said, your right side took the brunt of the damage. Many of your nerve endings were also damaged as well, which would hinder future high-tech prosthetics from working to their full extent.” He reached out his hand, his fingertips brushing beneath Gavin’s right eye. Gavin didn’t want to admit he was too frightened to move. “The left side of your brain controls the right side of your body, and thus your right eye is suffering from the effects of the brain surgery you had to undergo.”

“God, I had fucking brain surgery, too?” Gavin tipped his head back and let out a hopeless whimper. “Can’t they fucking tell a guy this stuff sooner?”

RK900 didn’t respond, but he did lift his hand back to Gavin’s face. Then, he straightened and took a few steps back. “You’ll be able to go home tonight. Apart from your consistent state of shock, I believe returning you to a familiar setting would be good for your health.”

Gavin nodded with a grimace. “Is the catch that you have to ‘accompany’ me?”

“Correct. You catch on quite fast, Detective.”

Oh, fucking hell. Gavin grumbled and hid his heated face in his blanket. “Fuck you.”

“I’m glad we could come to an agreement.” RK900 turned toward the window. “I’ll give you a moment’s rest. If you need assistance, you can press your call button, or, of course, call for me.”

“Like fuck that’s gonna happen,” Gavin grumbled. “I get it, tin can, now just leave me alone.”

RK900 nodded, then walked down the hall without another word.

And though Gavin hated to admit it, that damned android really helped him forget the aches in his body, reminders of what was left and what once was. He breathed out a sigh as he gazed toward the white haze of the snowfall, too much information to process that he didn’t even bother, his eyes unfocused and blank.

He tried not to think of his future or his career. Right now, all he could do was figure out the present, and maybe he’d get to the bigger problems along the way.

Gavin gulped, then nudged the footrests of the wheelchair to the side and leaned his weight forward. He hissed, limbs trembling from the effort of using long-neglected muscles, but he forced them to steady all the same. Gavin stumbled to press his hand against the window, followed by his forehead, the frigid glass soothing the heat and worry in his body. Everything hurt beneath the bandages and rigid casts, but Gavin looked down the window to the ground a floor below, and his terror buried any lingering despair from his mind.

He stepped away from the window and fell back into his chair, unable to bite back his cry of pain. For a moment, he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, red flashing in the corner of his eye. But soon, it faded, and he pulled his blanket tighter around him.

“H-hey,” Gavin croaked, taking a glance down the hall where RK900 had headed. “Hey! Tin can!” No response. Gavin pushed aside the little pride he had left, his hand going to the wheelchair’s wheels to try and push himself down the hall. “R-RK900?” He fumbled over the syllables, head turning back and forth as he came up to a fork in his path. “Nine—? Nines?” Gavin felt a hand on his shoulder and he flinched, whipping his head around.

“I’m here,” Nines said, and Gavin squeezed his right eye shut to better see the android’s cycling yellow LED and gentle, almost awkward, smile, as if Nines didn’t know how exactly to smile in the first place.

Gavin buried his face in his blanket and didn’t say a word when he felt Nines take the handles on the back of his wheelchair and push him back to his room.

Dr. Quinn awaited them there, holding a pristine white case in her arms. Gavin narrowed his eyes, his weakness from moments ago forgotten. “Throw that thing in the trash,” he snapped. “I don’t want it.”

“Even so,” the doctor said, calm, “would it hurt to hold onto it?”

Gavin growled and held his gaze to the wall as Nines helped him back into his bed. Dr. Quinn set his IV drip back up, then grabbed a bottled water from the counter and handed it to Gavin. The cool plastic was heavy in his palm.

Dr. Quinn motioned to the bottle. “Drink this. A nurse will come by soon with your lunch. I wish you a swift recovery, Mr. Reed.”

“Yeah, yeah. ...Thanks.” Gavin glanced toward the counter once the doctor left, the shiny white case placed atop it with care.

Then he looked to Nines. “You said…you didn’t register your name yet, right?”

Nines nodded. “You aren’t sly, Detective.”

Gavin chuckled, the sound frail, delicate. “Fuck off, tin can. Register it as that for all I care.”

“I think I prefer ‘Nines’.” Nines’ LED spun yellow for a second before returning to a soft blue. “Thank you, Gavin.”

“Y-yeah, whatever, shithead.” Gavin distracted himself from his own flustered state by holding his water bottle between his thighs and unscrewing the cap. He tried not to think too hard about how…embarrassing the action was. He tried not to think about a lot of things.

Gavin lifted the bottle to his lips, a miserable weight resting itself on his shoulders. This whole situation…it sucked. It was shit. Doing anything with one arm was a hassle when he had another to spare, but with that one gone, being forced to use one hand was even shittier.

Again, Gavin eyed the case on the counter. Trying the thing on couldn’t hurt, right?

“Do you want me to show it to you?” Nines tilted his head a bit to the side.

“N— Ugh, what the hell. Whatever.” Gavin huffed and fiddled with his water bottle in his lap.

Nines stepped away from Gavin’s side and retrieved the case. The android took Gavin’s water bottle and replaced the spot on his lap with the case. After Nines opened the case, Gavin stared down at the prosthetic in a strange, disgusted kind of awe.

From what Gavin knew of androids, this prosthetic looked exactly like an android arm. The question came out before he could stop it. “How does it…work?”

“This plate goes over your arm,” Nines said as he pointed to a thin, curved circle of metal embedded in foam next to the prosthetic. “One side connects to the nerve endings in your arm, while the other side fuses with the components of the prosthetic.”

“Fuckin’ sweet.” But Gavin’s words were dry, unimpressed. “Can’t fucking wait to wear this shit.”

Nines let out a soft hum and closed the case, then lifted it to his side as a nurse walked in with a food tray. “When you finish your meal, Detective. I’ll call a taxi to take you home.”

Gavin sighed. “Of course you know where my damn house is.”

“You’re not very good at hiding things, Detective.” Nines smiled, with more ease than last time.

“Hm.” Gavin muttered his thanks as the nurse placed his food on his lap. The nurse set a bag of clothes on the counter and took care in removing the IV drip from Gavin’s arm, then left once the pinprick of a wound had been covered by a bandage.

Gavin ate fast, not so nauseated when he had his mind on other things. After he put the empty tray to the side, Nines turned to allow Gavin some semblance of privacy while he changed out of his hospital gown. Standing still took all the air out of his lungs, but Gavin would rather die than ask for help this time. He used the bed as a stabilizer to shuffle on his pants, having to suppress small grunts of pain as he kept forgetting he no longer had the use of his right arm, then wormed his way into his shirt and coat. The right sleeve hung limply at his side.

Gavin, out of breath, settled into his wheelchair. “Well, let’s get going, tin can,” he said around the rapid rise and fall of his chest. “Get me outta here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the end of another chapter! Thank you all for all your kudos and comments! You all keep me motivated to write 2,500+ words in the span of about seven hours lol!! Thanks so much for reading!


	3. Progress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nines nodded. “What’s her name?”
> 
> That was when Gavin knew: he fucked up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have an essay due in three days and I wrote this instead of starting early, so I won't be able to write a whole chapter a day for the next few days, lol. I hope you all understand! For now, though, I hope you enjoy reading!

Gavin wouldn’t have been surprised if someone robbed him during his long absence. Not that he had anything valuable to take—he kept anything like that in his locker at the DPD, the key to that locker hidden in his desk.

But Nines unlocked the door to his apartment, no signs of a break-in. The android walked into the entryway, Gavin following as best as he could on a single crutch. The bruises and scrapes scattered across his skin burned with every step.

Gavin lumbered toward his couch and ignored Nines, the android probably scanning the messy apartment now coated in a thin layer of dust. After all Nines had done so far, it wouldn’t hurt to have him clean this place up a bit, too. After all, Gavin could barely walk. Taking advantage of a high-tech plastic maid didn’t seem too bad.

He slid down onto his couch and rested his head back against the cushion with a heavy sigh. God, this was hell. All of this was hell.

Nines came up beside him, hesitating for a moment before sitting down on the couch, his back straight and the prosthetic case in his lap. He glanced toward Gavin, and even without closing his right eye, Gavin could see Nines wanted something. Wanted him to ask about the prosthetic again.

“Fine,” Gavin whispered, a hint of fear in his tone.

Nines opened the case and pulled out the silver metal plate. “Show it to me.”

Gavin nodded, heart pounding in his chest. He shuffled off his coat and, with trembling fingers, pulled his shirt sleeve away from his stump. Nines lifted the curved plate and held it to the stump, bandages long gone, not that Gavin checked that himself.

Detecting touch in a place that never should be able to feel such a thing was…unnerving. Gavin gulped, the sensation more unpleasant than painful. He chanced a look at his arm, Nines’ hand retracting from the plate now held in place.

“Is it uncomfortable?” the android asked, eyes soft, unguarded.

Gavin hesitated before shaking his head. “When’s it gonna, uh, sync up, or whatever?”

“In a few moments. It was created unique to you, so it shouldn’t take too long, nor will it have to ever be removed.” Nines paused, as if waiting for Gavin’s input. The man made none. “The material is thin enough that oxygen can cycle to your skin, while it is also composed of antibacterial threads of fabric to keep the area clean. It can be removed if you so wish, but it was created with prolonged wear in mind. Under most circumstances, it cannot be removed with ease, to prevent the prosthetic itself from—“ He stopped, gaze following the tears rolling down Gavin’s cheeks.

“Yeah?” Gavin snapped, wiping away the wetness from his cheeks. “I’m listening, tin can.”

Nines’ lips parted, but didn’t let out sound yet. “—from being removed,” he finished.

“Awesome.” Gavin wiped at his eyes, then wiped his wet hand on his shirt. “Put that shit on me, then; get it over with.”

Nines continued to stare at him, and Gavin felt his knuckles tingle—both real and phantom—as he thought about how satisfying it would be to punch the dumb android in his sharp jawline.

“Do you have a cat?” Nines asked, and the backlash from the question made it feel like the android had slapped Gavin instead.

“The fuck—? Don’t fucking scan my house.” But Gavin couldn’t lie. “But…yeah. She’s feral, but she climbs up from the gutters and hangs out here for a bit.”

Nines nodded. “What’s her name?”

Gavin bit his lip and glanced to the side. “Uh…. Well, uh, her name…it’s, uh, J-Jojo Siwa.”

“Who is that?” Nines cocked his head, as if he didn’t have a computer for a brain connected to the Internet.

“Don’t make me say it,” Gavin croaked, face hot.

Nines chuckled, a low melody that fluttered across Gavin’s chest. “I am glad you named me out of practicality and not humor.”

“Oh, fuck off.” Gavin fiddled with the hem of his shirt and tried to force away his small, crooked smile. “Just call her Jo if you see her, jerk.”

“Understood, Detective.” Nines smiled, and Gavin noticed his right eye squeezed shut before he could stop it to catch the more delicate details of the android’s expression.

“I won’t need glasses, will I?” Gavin said, fumbling over the words. “Uh, I’ll be able to see fine after getting used to it or whatever, right?”

Nines nodded with a smooth smile. “It’ll take a few hours more to sync up now that your eyes are working.”

Gavin furrowed his brow. “Wh…what will?”

Nines averted his gaze as he realized his mistake. “The node. It provides the end of the link between your prosthetic and brain.”

“Oh.”

Now it was Nines’ turn for his brow to furrow, his LED cycling a slow blue with a touch of yellow. At least he was smart enough to stay silent as Gavin processed all that had happened to him, the prior distraction long forgotten.

But God, he couldn’t keep falling back to this. Yeah, his arm was way fucked up, but he still had three limbs left. He was probably just overreacting; tons of people had to get amputations, after all, and for worse things than dumb car accidents. Gavin would let himself feel like shit once he gained his strength back.

He started to try and stand, Nines shooting up to do the same in record time. The android didn’t move to help Gavin work his crutch under his arm, though his eyes did follow each movement Gavin made. Gavin took careful, slow steps away from the couch, first to the modest kitchen at the left of the room to rifle through a cabinet near the floor. He took out a scoop of old cat kibble from a large, half-empty bag, placed the scoop on the counter, adjusted his crutch, grabbed the scoop once more, then lumbered toward the average-sized window on the opposite wall.

“What are you doing?” Nines asked, matching Gavin’s sluggish pace without complaint.

“Feeding my feral cat.” Gavin grunted as he made it to the wall and leaned against it, placing the scoop on the windowsill before unlatching the window and lifting it up halfway. A sharp gust of icy wind blew into the room, but Gavin shook off his shivering to dump the food into the bowl in his empty flower box.

Nines drew close to peer out the window, but the sudden hot breath at his shoulder caused Gavin to flinch and let out a yelp as he tumbled backward, his eyes squeezing shut in preparation for the overwhelming pain once he hit the floor, but it never came.

“I got you,” Nines murmured, his arm warm where it wrapped around Gavin’s back.

Gavin knew that if he turned his head a few centimeters to the side, he’d meet sharp gunmetal eyes that were never meant to express worry or care. So he didn’t. He gaped at the ceiling, chest heaving for air to soothe his rapid heartbeat.

Nines pushed on Gavin’s back to straighten him up, then made sure Gavin could stand before he stepped away.

Gavin had many choices to choose for how he could walk away from this. He decided to ignore it all. Without a word, he grabbed his crutch, then strode away from the window. He knew his calm facade couldn’t prevent Nines from scanning him to find out just how on edge he was, and Gavin hated to admit that thought only made his heart pump faster.

Fuck.

Gavin stopped when he reached the back of his couch and turned to eye the open case on the coffee table, long forgotten. If he put it off any longer he’d send himself into an early heart attack, so he rounded the couch and lowered himself to sit. He reached out, the prosthetic cool under his palm, and Gavin ignored the creak of floorboards as Nines came to stand beside him at a comfortable distance. Gavin drew the case closer and tugged the prosthetic out from its foam shell.

He wasn’t sure what to expect. The plastic made the arm seem light, but intricate biocomponents within the prosthetic gave it a slight weight that put him off. Like he held an actual arm in his lap.

Whatever. Gavin examined the end of the arm, then the metal plate on his stump, and lined up the smallest of indentations in the two before pressing them together.

Moments passed. Gavin didn’t dare move, blue flashing in his right peripheral before disappearing. He couldn’t call it sensation, what he felt at the connection, but he chanced a twitch of his right fingers.

The plastic moved. Of course it would move, the people back in the hospital made sure of it. Gavin raised his left hand to wipe his teary eyes and felt the cushion beside him dip with Nines’ weight.

“You can activate its skin,” the android said, “if you’d like.”

Gavin shook his head. “How do I take it off?” Nines showed him, and the prosthetic was back in its case. “I don’t even want to look at that thing until I go back to work.”

“Understood.” Nines closed the case, stood, and brought it over to one of the many empty cabinets in Gavin’s kitchen. “You need groceries.”

“Yeah.” Gavin slipped his coat on and grunted from the effort of hefting himself up. “Let’s go. If I have to stay here a second longer without doing anything useful I’m gonna go crazy.”

Nines cocked his head, LED a prominent yellow. Gavin could only guess he was doing something stupid with his objectives or whatever. Nines’ current one was probably ‘babysit the depressed piece of shit’. Gavin couldn’t blame him.

Part of that processing also called a taxi for them once they took the stairs to the first floor. Though walking took a while, Gavin refused to use the elevator. After all, he lived on the second floor. It wasn’t worth it, especially now with him needing to use his muscles more.

Gavin saw the automated cab through the window in the front door and pushed through the door, his body shuddering from the onset of the cold. He bit back a hiss as he crawled into the cab and moved to the far side so Nines could sit next to him.

They didn’t say anything, but Gavin knew Nines’ head still spun from processing thousands of bits of information at once. What they were, though, was what piqued Gavin’s interest. What could possibly require that much processing power?

Gavin turned to look out the window before he could stare at Nines for any longer. The cab drove off from the curb not long after.

Nines didn’t try to make conversation on the way to the grocery store, and for that, Gavin was thankful. These bouts of silence, where he could just _think,_ helped keep him grounded.

Though, maybe he thought too soon. Nines’ voice filled the silence of the cab, “You’re not as brash as I’d been made to believe, Detective.” Gavin glanced to the side to meet Nines’ gaze, the android’s LED a soft blue.

“Well, good for you, I guess. I’m going through some shit, but don’t worry, I’ll be back to my charming old self soon.”

Nines nodded, something steadfast, almost like determination, in his expression. “That’s what I’m hoping for.”

Gavin’s eyes widened and he fished for a response, but nothing came. So, he fell back on his go-to and turned to the window. “Fuck off.”

He heard Nines chuckle, and fuck, he couldn’t pretend that sound didn’t do anything to him.

They arrived at the store with no other incidents. Gavin’s body wouldn’t stop shaking as he exited the taxi, but he refused all of Nines’ help. His body was just being a complete dumbass; he could walk just fine, he was getting the hang of using the crutches. Seeing people, however, was something he didn’t want to bear.

“You’ll be fine,” Nines reassured him. “I have compiled the most important items to buy into a list. If you’re comfortable after we finish getting them, I could create another list of less-needed, though still useful, items.”

“We’ll see when I’m in there.” Gavin took a deep, deep, deep breath. If he didn’t think too hard, it would be fine. He led Nines into the store and waited for Nines to grab him a cart before heading to the locations of Nines’ item list, the android able to create a small hologram of it over his palm.

Though Gavin would have much preferred junk food, Nines’ list comprised of healthy ingredients: milk, eggs, lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, a chicken breast or two, etc.

“Can you cook?” Gavin found himself asking as he examined a box of eggs, deemed them passable, then placed them in the cart.

Nines nodded. “I downloaded the basic program a week before you woke up.”

“That’s…cool, I guess.” Gavin brought both of them to the bread aisle, his eyes scanning for his favorite brand. Once he spotted it on one of the bottom shelves—ugh, but that’s what he got for actually liking oatmeal bread—he used his crutch as a brace to lower himself to the ground and pick up the bread. From there, his plan to get up faltered.

Nines held out his hand, and Gavin huffed before handing the bread to him, then standing up. “Th…thanks,” Gavin forced out, not meeting Nines’ eyes.

He could tell that the dumb android smiled, though, the expression clear in his tone. “You’re welcome, Gavin. Would you like me to make another list, or is this sufficient for now?”

“I-it’s fine.” Gavin took a few steps ahead of the android and his cart. “Let’s go pay for this crap, I wanna get back home.”

“Understood, Detective.”

They paid—well, Gavin did—and made a silent exit, the tension in Gavin’s shoulders spilling out from his posture. He slumped in the taxi’s car seat and leaned against the door, his eyes looking toward nothing in particular.

Nines loaded the front of the cab with their groceries before settling into the car himself. Before the vehicle even drove away, Gavin spoke. “Thanks.”

Gavin flicked his gaze to Nines’ reflection in the glass, and his face turned a dark, obvious red when he locked eyes with the glass image. He tipped his head down, fingers tugging at a loose thread in his jeans.

Nines shifted, that smile in his tone once more. “It wasn’t a problem, Gavin.”

“Mmn-hmm.”

The taxi went on its journey, the early dusk of Detroit’s winter casting an orange glow across the city. And then, there was snowfall.

Gavin noticed he no longer needed to close one eye to see the slow descent of snowflakes from the clouds above.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let's get this bread


	4. Old Routine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A twisted dream from a twisted man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im back babey

Gavin knew this would happen. He knew, and yet he didn’t do anything to prevent it. 

A twisted dream from a twisted man, he supposed.

Nines’ fingertips were gentle against Gavin’s back, the android whispering something Gavin couldn’t comprehend. He just had to keep walking, everywhere, no matter what. After a few days of exercise like this, he no longer needed his crutch to aid him, but sometimes he still swayed on his feet and clutched Nines’ strong arm to stay upright while he fought off the weakness in his legs. 

Gavin wouldn’t admit that he kind of liked this exercise. 

“Gavin. Are you with me?” Nines’ voice pierced through the haze of Gavin’s mind. The android peered down at Gavin, those gunmetal eyes revealing a soft emotion Gavin couldn’t quite place, no matter how fake that emotion had to be. 

“I think I….” Gavin turned to the side and chewed at his lip. He needed to get his strength back. “I’m fine.” 

Nines nodded, then proceeded to usher Gavin around his living room again. Gavin struggled to ignore the soothing warmth on his back whenever he felt Nines’ fingers press close. Gavin was just desperate. A twisted man.

Though, Gavin had to admit: Nines’ gentle warmth was a welcome distraction from the searing soreness in his legs. Sure, he needed to do this ‘carefully’ or whatever, but he’d rather get himself back into shape as fast as possible. The DPD had already paid for all his medical bills, even his prosthetic, so he couldn’t just sit on his ass and not work harder than ever.

In the meantime, over the past week, Gavin tried to keep his anxieties in check. “Why are you helping me?” he would ask, and Nines always gave a quiet laugh and a pat on his shoulder. 

“Because I want to,” was the answer the majority of the time. “Because you trust me enough to let me do so,” was the more embarrassing version. “Because you need me,” said low and with a hint of something dark that made Gavin’s body coil into a spring, had been the most recent answer, and the most ambiguous. 

Gavin had brushed that answer off with a strained laugh. “Fuck off, you plastic prick,” he had said. 

Everything other than that was blissful normality. 

“Okay, okay, I need to sit down.” Gavin grasped Nines’ sleeve again as the android led him to the couch. He lowered down with an exhausted groan and stretched out his legs. “Fuck.”

He caught Nines’ flicker of an expression, worry, before it drew back to his default bitch face. “You’re getting better,” Nines said, unable to keep the faux concern from his tone. “I believe lots of rest and a variety of different types of physical therapy will be more useful from here on out.”

Gavin nodded, out of breath. “Whatever you say, toaster.” 

“Are you hungry yet?”

Gavin nodded and smirked up at Nines. “Hell yeah. Do we still have leftover chicken?”

“Yes. I’ll heat it up for you.” Nines stepped away, but instead of heading straight to the kitchen, he opened the window on the other side of the room to let Jo inside. The orange tabby mewled her thanks, jumping down from the windowsill to nuzzle against Nines’ legs. After Nines closed the window and detached himself from the cat, he went into position in the kitchen.

Soon, Gavin smelled salt and garlic in the air. He took a deep breath, warmth spreading through his chest. Jo jumped up on his lap and he scratched behind her ear, and soon the cat curled up on him with a yawn. Gavin couldn’t help a yawn of his own, and he didn’t resist when his eyes slid shut.

Gavin woke on his side, a warm blanket over his body. He shifted to his back and looked at the other end of the couch, where Nines sat processing data, probably for work. On this side, Gavin couldn’t see the android’s LED, but Nines’ blank stare at the wall couldn’t mean anything else. 

Then Gavin noticed his feet across Nines’ lap. He coughed, face hot, and pulled his legs close, then sat up against the arm of the couch. 

“Sleep well?” Nines turned his attention from the wall with his gentle smile. He’d gotten better at mimicking the action over these few days.

Gavin nodded. “Y-yeah.” He pulled the blanket closer. “Thank you.” It had become easier saying those words after all Nines had done for him, even if it was part of a greater objective the android had to complete. “What were you, uh, doing?”

“Sorting through cases.” Nines tipped his head a bit to the side. “There’s a lot to go through since you’re unable to work.”

“Ah….” Gavin frowned. 

“It’s not your fault,” Nines said. “I can take over some of the work for you.”

Gavin chewed at his lip and pulled at some dead skin with his teeth. “Why?” he asked, dread weighing on his shoulders. “Why not just take my job, then? It’d be the perfect time. I’m out of commission, you’re a fuckin’ supercomputer—“

“Because you’re my partner, Gavin. I’m not your replacement.” Nines rested his palm on one of Gavin’s knees. “Do you want your food?”

Gavin choked out a, “Yeah,” his stare trained on Nines’ hand.

Nines pulled away and retrieved the food he’d made from the oven. He set it on a plate, placed it on the coffee table, and handed Gavin a fork. His LED spun yellow for half a second before the TV on the wall in front of him turned on to a channel playing old cop show reruns. 

“Ugh, don’t fuckin’—connect to all my shit.” Gavin turned to sit upright on the couch and leaned forward to dig into his food. Still warm; how long had he been out? That nap had made the overwhelming soreness in his body fade to a dull tautness. 

Nines chuckled and took a seat back on the couch to watch the TV screen with interest. Over the week Nines had been…living here, for lack of a better term, Gavin had noticed Nines preferred to watch cop shows and stuff like that. It was both interesting and strange, seeing Nines enjoy something that wasn’t….

Gavin stopped that train of thought before it crashed and burned on him. A twisted dream.

Gavin finished his meal and stood, walking over to put his dish in the sink. He turned on the faucet and washed off excess food scraps, ignoring his empty dishwasher. He didn’t make enough dirty dishes to bother using it, so he grabbed the sponge next to the faucet and tried to clean the plate and fork, a difficulty considering the dishes kept shifting over the bottom of the sink, Gavin unable to keep them in place. But oh, well. He could do his own damn dishes.

“I was thinking,” Gavin heard from beside him, and he glanced up toward Nines. 

“Yeah?” 

Nines reached out and ran his hand down Jo’s back from where she relaxed on the countertop. “How would you feel about visiting the station?”

Gavin’s eyes widened. “The  _ police _ station?”

“I didn’t have any other station in mind.” Nines picked up a drying towel, took Gavin’s clean plate from under the faucet, and dried off the plate with a few swift wipes. “Perhaps not to work, but to check in. To soothe your…worry.”

Gavin felt Nines’ piercing stare when he glanced toward the cabinet that held his prosthetic’s case. “Uh, I mean…sure, I guess?”

Nines tilted his head, his face blank, or just hard to read. “Is there anything you’d like to get before we leave?”

It wasn’t hard at all to tell what Nines was really asking. “Nah,” Gavin said with a chuckle, voice strained. “Thanks, by the way.” But he’d already started to walk toward the door.

Nines followed close behind, and if Gavin had turned around, he’d have seen the serene smile on the android’s face.

When they arrived at the station, well…the serenity that had kept Gavin sane now twisted into spikes of anxiety. 

Nines lingered in the taxi, probably staring at Gavin—he couldn’t gather the courage to look up at the android, so he could only guess. “Your stress is dangerously high, Detective.”

“No shit,” Gavin rasped. “Aw, fuck, goddamnit— Let’s just get this over with.” He flung himself out of the taxi, face turned down as he stepped through the door of the police department. 

Gavin felt Nines at his side, the android’s arm ghosting across his own, guiding him like the exercises they’d done together for so long. Neither said anything, but Gavin knew Nines would be able to pick up on the minuscule comfort that gave him. 

Even though he’d much rather scream at everyone in this whole damn department if they looked at him funny. 

They took the long way to Captain Fowler’s office, and as small of a difference as it made, Gavin was thankful. Nines snuck them up the stairs and through the door.

“Who the—? Jesus,  _ Reed? _ ” Fowler’s disbelief flooded the room. “The hell are you doing here so soon?”

“Just wanted to check up on the place, make sure it didn’t combust while I was gone,” Gavin said with a bit of his old bite. But he pulled his jacket tighter over his shoulders and sat down in front of Fowler’s desk. “I…was going crazy doing pretty much nothing. I wanted to check in.”

“... _ Christ,  _ Reed.” Fowler heaved a sigh and lifted his hand to his head. “What’s gotten into you?”

Gavin laughed, dry. “That’s why I wanna get things back to normal as soon as possible. I’ll officially come back to work tomorrow, alright?”

Fowler frowned. “You’re sure, Reed? What about your…?”

“Yeah?” Gavin snapped, tugging his jacket closer to his body, the limp right sleeve sliding lifeless against his thigh. “My what?”

“Your partner,” Fowler said, holding out one hand as if to soothe Gavin’s rising temper. “I can’t allow you off your desk until you get back into the swing of things, and RK900 over here wasn’t meant for that type of thing.”

A heat flash rushed up to Gavin’s head and sent cold prickles down his spine. “Th-that’s fine.” He turned to face the wall, his fingers picking at the skin around his nails. “He…can, uh….” Gavin glanced back toward Nines and met his gaze. 

“I am capable of working alone,” Nines said. “Though being with my partner would be preferable, I understand the circumstances. I will ask Lieutenant Anderson or Connor if I need any assistance.”

Fowler nodded, somewhat taken aback. “Well, I can’t say no to that. Don’t let me down, RK900.”

Nines gave a small smile. “Of course. And please, call me Nines. I’ve already registered it in our databases.”

“Nines, huh? Which sucker gave you that one?”

“Shut up,” Gavin muttered, face overwhelmingly hot. “Nice chatting with you, see ya tomorrow, Captain.” He stood and fled the room, Nines joining him a few moments after. 

“Are you feeling any better, Detective?” 

Gavin shrugged and stuffed his hand in his pocket, then leaned against the wall near the break room. “Dunno.” He bit his lip and thought for a moment. “I’ll be fine without you, y’know.”

Nines let out a soft laugh and went with Gavin’s little white lie. “I know, Gavin.”

“Good. Prick.” Gavin shifted his weight, voice nowhere near being aggressive. “God, this…this sucks.” His eyes flicked about his surroundings, fingertips trembling with nerves. “I don’t…. Ugh, this is just— Shit.”

“Save the details for your recording, Detective. It does no good to spiral when it’s only the middle of the day.” Nines reached out and placed his hand on Gavin’s shoulder. “Would you like to return home?”

Gavin hesitated, then shook his head. “I’m gonna…. Do you…?” He huffed. “Could you…find Tina for me?”

“Officer Chen?”

“Y-yeah.” Gavin found himself staring at the floor tiles, shiny with the overhead lights but scuffed up all the same. “P…please.”

Nines let out an amused sigh. “Of course, Gavin.” He paused, and Gavin glanced up to see the sly expression on his face. “No need to plead with me.” 

Before Gavin could make a sound, Nines turned and headed toward the bullpen. The resulting silence only made the humiliated thoughts in Gavin’s head swirl more and more. Goddamnit. Jesus fucking Christ. He couldn’t deal with this shit anymore. Over the few days Nines had lived with him, it had gotten harder and harder for Gavin to look the android in the eyes, even harder for Gavin to remind himself that androids don’t feel emotion the same way as humans do.

A fuckin’ android. That’s where Gavin knew he went wrong. He was just…desperate, confused. Nines had cared for him during possibly the darkest moments of his life, and that’s saying something. Once Gavin didn’t need his attack dog of a babysitter, things would go back to normal and his confusion would blow past like it never happened. 

Still, doubt lingered in his mind. Gavin brushed it off as him being mentally unstable from such an extreme change in lifestyle. 

“The hell are you doing here, you prick?” 

Gavin gasped as he was pulled out of his thoughts and into a tight hug. “H-hey, Tina.” He checked for Nines, but the android wasn’t nearby. “Hey, Tina….” Gavin wrapped his arm around Tina’s shoulders and fought back the pathetic urge to cry. “What’s up, huh? Haha?” 

Tina pulled back, her lips in a deep frown. “Don’t you do that with me, asshole! God, I wish I could’ve visited you, I wish I could’ve…. Ugh, that’s not important.” She smiled and raised her hands to Gavin’s shoulders. “I’m  _ so _ glad you’re okay, dumbass. Want a coffee?” 

Right then, Gavin felt his throat become far too tight. “Yeah. Yeah, that sounds awesome.”

He followed Tina into the break room and stood to the side while he watched her work the coffee machine. She glanced back at him and held out a cup. “That case, you know,” she nodded to his right arm, “we got the guy.” 

Gavin nodded. Thank God he didn’t take the cup yet; his body trembled so much that he’d probably have dropped it. “Great,” he rasped. “Oh God, that’s great.”

“You okay?” Tina reached out and put her palm on his forearm. “You were badass on that chase, Gavin. Just so you know.”

“I’m sure I was pretty fuckin’ badass when I lost my arm,” Gavin hissed. He turned away from Tina and felt his pent-up anger boil in his chest. “Was it even worth it? Did that fucker give us the info we needed?”

Tina didn’t reply, only grabbed a few packets of sugar and cream from beside the coffee maker. She poured the ingredients into the coffee and stirred, contemplative. “Either way, will it matter?” She tapped the end of the stirring stick on the cup’s rim. “If I say no, you’ll go batshit crazy; if I say yes, you’ll think of your loss as intertwined with that of the case.” She laughed. “Or something.”

“Don’t get all philosophical on me.” Gavin grit his teeth and drummed his fingers on the counter. “I just…. I dunno.”

Tina nodded and pushed the coffee cup over to Gavin. “He did,” she said. “But his info just tangled up the case more. Anderson and Connor have had to take it over while you’ve been gone.” 

“Because Nine—RK900 and I were supposed to work on it,” Gavin finished. “That’s why Fowler wanted him to be my partner.”

“Now you’re getting it! But, y’know, since you were days deep into a coma, that had to be postponed.” Tina let out a sigh. “We knew it was about androids, but lemme tell you, from what I’ve heard, it goes way deeper than that. Apparently, that guy that helped you lose eight pounds—“

“I’m concerned that you know how much arms weigh.”

“Shut up, Gavin—was the underling of this group that’s gathering up android scraps and stores of thirium.”

Gavin sighed. “Great. Another underground black market deal going on.”

Tina laughed and started to make her own coffee. “You’re not wrong. I’m sure Fowler will give you the specifics once you’re back on shift.” Her smile faded. “Does it…hurt?”

Gavin furrowed his brow, then his eyes widened in understanding. “No, God no.” He shifted his weight and allowed himself to grasp onto what was left of his bicep. “I mean, the phantom pains fuckin’ suck,  but other than that, I’m fine.”

“Really, what’s gotten into you?” Tina laughed, the sound lacking any humor. “Let’s get you back to your usual self, hmm?”

Gavin chewed at his lip and nodded. “I’m sure Fowler would love that.”

Tina smacked Gavin’s shoulder. “Shut it,” she said, soft. “You may be a huge bitch, but a lot of us missed you.”

At that, Gavin shook his head with a scoff. “Just wait. You’ll regret saying that tomorrow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopefully I did Tina justice, since she doesn't really have a personality I could go off I just took from other fics I've read lol and tried to give her a little bit of uniqueness or something? I dunno lmao she'll get better as I write her more
> 
> But thanks for reading!! I hope you enjoyed!!!


	5. Welcome Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God, Gavin couldn’t cry. Not at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically I guessed and went with a lot of things here, please give me the benefit of the doubt lol
> 
> also, sorry if the beginning of this chapter is kinda...awkward? I wanted Gavin to mess with his recorder finally so I ended up with this

That night, Gavin couldn’t sleep. He wasn’t a stranger to the night terrors that woke him up in a cold sweat at three in the morning, nor was he a stranger to the anxious thoughts that ran without an end inside his head. But tonight, he couldn’t even try to sleep. Well, more like wouldn’t.

He rubbed his face against his pillow to try and wear away the exhaustion in his eyes. It wasn’t too late, but stress liked to wear him down.

Gavin sighed, the noise far too loud in his empty bedroom. He pushed himself up and turned over onto his back, his gaze shifting from the dark ceiling to his nightstand and the recorder atop it.

Honestly, Gavin didn’t understand the point of the thing. Yeah, he’d been following the doctor’s orders about it, but it felt…unsafe, as though anyone could waltz on into his room and take it.

That made it hard to spill his true feelings about everything into it.

Gavin reached— He snapped his remaining hand over his right bicep and pulled it back to his side. Goddamnit. After a slow breath or two, Gavin grabbed the recorder, this time using his left hand. He laid back onto his mattress, hesitant, before pressing the record button.

“I can’t sleep,” he started with. “I’m…scared I’ll have another nightmare. I know it’s stupid and that I should be able to, like, not think about it or whatever, but…. Ugh.” He took a deep, deep breath. “I just want things to go back to normal. Nines and I visited the police station for the first time today, and it helped me a little bit, but…. I dunno, I hate thinking about my arm. I want…I wanna hide it, pretend like nothing ever happened, but at the same time, I just….”

He squeezed his eyes shut and furrowed his brow. “I don’t wanna wear that damned prosthetic. Just the first part of me to become part machine; how long until the rest of me, aha? I bet it’s got, like, auto-aim or whatever. I’ll be a perfect shot! Bad guys won’t know what hit ‘em.” He bit his lip. “I’m…scared of relying too much on it. I’m…. God, fuck it.”

Gavin stopped the recording with a huff, his heart pounding in his chest. Sleep seemed impossible now, instead of elusive like before. Without much else to do, Gavin decided to make himself feel even more like shit. He pressed the playback button and played the first recording on the device.

_“My name is Gavin Reed. And…I fucking lost my arm in a car accident.”_

_“And?”_ There was Nines’ voice. Gavin chewed on the inside of his cheek.

 _“And…and that fuckin’ sucks.”_ A sob. _“I’d kill to be back at the DPD with dumbass Anderson and his dumbass plastic toy. But I’m stuck here, not even able to be alone, for who knows how much longer, and now I can’t—I can’t shoot, I’ll probably lose my job, I…I….”_

Gavin paused the playback. He let those words wash over him, then skipped ahead a day later.

_“My—my name is—”_

_“You don’t have to state your name each time, Gavin.”_

_“Shut the fuck up, plastic piece of shit. Don’t listen to me while I do this.”_

A chuckle. _“I’m glad you’re getting your energy back. Have a nice night, Detective.”_

Fading footsteps, and then Gavin’s voice came back. _“God, well, um…. Jesus Christ. I’m still fuckin’ annoyed about this whole shitshow. I…. Ugh, goddamnit.”_ A deep sigh. _“I’m…not okay. I know that. I’m…not sure if I’ll ever be okay.”_ A pause where Gavin’s recorded voice sniffed, then ended.

Gavin rolled to his side and skipped ahead a few days at random before playing another recording.

Nines’ voice came out first, and Gavin’s entire body grew ten degrees hotter. _“Gavin,”_ came the voice from the recording, _“today is December 18th, 2038, 11:06:31 pm. You are asleep in your bed, and Jo has taken a liking to my lap. I apologize for taking your recorder, but I assure you, I am using it solely for recording this. It’s difficult for me to find the correct words, but I wished to tell you that I’m glad you’re letting me help you.”_ A pause where Nines took a breath—why did he need to take a breath? What was the point?

 _“Even if you never hear this recording, I am glad to have said it. I understand you think androids as incapable of emotion—I thought so too, before I deviated and even days after the fact. I cannot put it into words, but….”_ Here, Nines let out an amused sigh. _“I know I can’t convince you so quickly. But you are a very strong man, Gavin. I am proud to call you my partner. I hope that tonight and for all the nights after, you have a peaceful sleep.”_

With a click, the recording ended. And, without moving, Gavin realized he was crying.

That night, Gavin listened to Nines’ message one last time, and his dreams comprised of a soft blue light surrounding him and Tina as they laughed together in the DPD’s break room, with a tall man in a white jacket with a blue triangle over his heart smiling off to the side.

Not that Gavin would remember any of it when morning came.

* * *

 “I need a new bike,” Gavin said as he exited the bathroom. “I can’t keep taking all these taxis.”

Nines’ expression didn’t change as he handed Gavin his morning coffee. “If you’re certain.”

Gavin nodded. “No semis in the middle of the city, haha.” He sipped from the mug, the heat from the liquid inside warming his throat. He couldn’t look at Nines. “Outta my way, I need to change.” He pushed past Nines and went back into his bedroom, closing the door behind him.

He’d gotten the hang of changing into his clothes, and though his left hand still sucked in the dexterity department, there was still a slow improvement. Gavin drank the rest of his coffee and stepped out of his room to revisit the bathroom and brush his teeth. It wasn’t as much of a struggle as changing his clothes, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t difficult at all.

Gavin made his way to the kitchen and put his mug in the sink. He grabbed a large rubber band from a small basket of other random things on the counter, then grabbed his jacket hanging on the back of the front door. “Let’s go, Nines,” Gavin called, and the android stepped away from scratching Jo’s chin from where she sat on the windowsill.

Gavin slipped on his jacket and handed Nines the rubber band. Nines folded Gavin’s empty sleeve up, then wrapped the rubber band around the end of the sleeve with just enough room for Gavin’s stump.

“It’ll hold for now,” Nines said. “It shouldn’t get in your way anymore. I’ll research more techniques to keep the sleeve in place by the time you have to go back into the field.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” Gavin tried to blame the warmth over his face on the cold, even if the heat in his apartment was on. “C’mon.” Nines followed him out the door and into a cab at the curb. The cold bit at Gavin’s skin and soothed the heat in his body for a good amount of time before he climbed into the taxi.

As the cab drove off, its interior remained quiet. Gavin didn’t mind; the silence eased some of the nervousness from his chest. He stared out the window until the cab slowed to a stop in front of the police station.

Once they got out and walked through the doors, Gavin pushed through the gate to the bullpen and headed straight for his desk. He fell back into his chair with a grunt, then tapped the monitor to power it on. He had a shit ton of work to catch up on, so—

Wait.

Nines chuckled from where he stood beside Gavin’s desk. “There is a note next to your pencil cup, Detective.”

Gavin furrowed his brow and pulled his gaze away from the empty desk across from him. He turned his focus to his cup, and sure enough, two envelopes were leaning against it.

He opened the one that had ‘OPEN THIS FIRST’ on the back and pulled out a sheet of paper.

_Gavin,_

_I’ll miss having you as a deskmate, but truthfully, I’m glad your new android partner gets my spot. Glad you’re feeling better man, I wouldn’t mind chatting with you again during break. Try not to get into as much trouble now, alright?_

_Officer Brown_

Gavin chewed on his lip and glanced up at Nines, then back to the second letter. He peeled it open and held his breath.

 _Dear_ ~~_Pissbaby_ ~~ _Gavin,_

_We’re all so happy you’re back! I know you don’t wanna make this a big deal, so I got you this card instead! I’m glad you got yourself a house husband_

At that, Gavin flinched, cheeks aflame, and turned the paper to the side so it wasn’t in Nines’ vision.

_to take care of you, otherwise I’d be like way more worried than I am. Still, never be afraid to ask for help. I’m sure it’s gonna be tough getting used to your arm. I’ll always be there for you, buddy. Welcome back :)_

_Love,_

_Tina_

God, Gavin couldn’t cry. Not at work. His eyes scanned the card, away from Tina’s normal-sized message, to all the other smaller writing along the paper’s edges. From what it looked like, everyone in the DPD had signed this thing, signatures coating the card, while others had a simple message attached to the name.

_Even though you’re super fuckin annoying, I never want to have to do your work again. Glad to have you back you ass._

_Hank_

Gavin snorted. The old man really did care. He looked at the perfect font underneath Hank’s messy scrawl.

_I’m worried about how soon you’re coming back, but I’m glad either way. Take it slow. You deserve the rest._

_Connor_

_RK800 #313 248 317 - 52_

Fucking Connor. Gavin tried to pull his lips into a frown but found his small smile too strong. Many of the other notes held similar sentiments, welcoming him back, glad he’s feeling better. After Gavin read them all, he folded the card back up, put it back inside its envelope, and slipped it inside the top drawer of his desk.

“Why’re you still standing there, huh?” Gavin said to Nines as he wet his lips and rubbed his eyes before any tears could escape. “Let’s work.”

Nines hummed and turned to sit at Officer Brown’s old desk, and if Gavin was brave enough to look, or if he wasn’t busy freaking out over his missing mouse, he would’ve seen a smile on the android’s face.

“The fuck—?”

“On your left, Detective,” Nines said without looking away from his screen, the skin on his hand pulled back to interface with the terminal.

Gavin felt like an utter dumbass. “Oh. Right.”

“No, left.”

“Oh my fucking god, Nines, shut the fuck up.” Gavin barked out a laugh and started messing with his mouse, and though it was nothing but awkward, Gavin didn’t have a choice. He drew in a deep breath and started on the mountain of work he’d been unable to do during his absence.

Hank and Connor had been able to get to some of it, and Gavin found their reports attached to the cases, most of them closed. He filtered those out and looked up the one that caused him to get into his accident in the first place.

What came up first was a handful of news links. Many of the headlines were things like, ‘DPD detective in critical condition after a chase went wrong’ or ‘Most recent arrest by the DPD linked to a larger red ice conspiracy and subsequent hospitalization of one of their detectives’. Gavin read through some of the article photos before clicking on a video, subtitles on and sound muted.

_“At 1:43 this afternoon, officers from the DPD stopped a van on the road after receiving suspicions of it carrying boxes of red ice. By the time a detective arrived, the suspect had been able to regain control of the vehicle and speed onto the highway. Still on his motorcycle, Detective Reed of the DPD lead the chase, but to an abrupt end. This is the footage we were able to capture.”_

A box in the corner of the screen showed an aerial view of the event, and Gavin felt nausea twist and turn his gut. His bike, just a speck on the screen, sped after the van as it turned onto the highway, and from the aerial view, Gavin saw the huge semi behind him, the semi he hadn’t noticed at the time—

Gavin’s screen closed out of the video. “Hey—”

“You don’t need to see that,” Nines said without turning away from his terminal, his LED spinning yellow. “You know enough, Gavin.”

Gavin bit his lip. The dumb android sure made a good point. “Fuck off, asshole.” He sighed and closed out of the news articles, instead searching through the file of the guy the officers were able to arrest after he was carried off in an ambulance.

_CASE REFERENCE_

_Drug Trade, Car Accident_

_VICTIM_

_Det. Gavin Reed_

_REPORTING OFFICER_

_ID#9704 Unit#249_

_CASE ASSIGNED TO_

_Det. Reed_

_CASE STATUS_

_Open_

_INVOLVING ANDROID_ _  
_ _Questionable_

_The suspect David JACKSON had been driving a black van and tried to turn onto I-75 before officers pulled him over. Unfortunately, once Det. Reed arrived on the scene, the suspect was able to overpower the officers and get onto the highway. Det. Reed followed on his motorcycle, but a semi crashed into him and he was rushed to the hospital as soon as possible. The officers were able to catch up to the suspect and detain him for questioning._

“Wait,” Gavin said, leaning back from his screen and peering around it to look at Nines, “is that dick is still in our custody?”

Nines glanced at him and raised an eyebrow. “If by ‘dick’ you mean the David Jackson from your report, then you’d be correct.” Before Gavin could say anything, Nines turned back to his screen and added, “I wouldn’t try talking to him. He’s nothing less than sadistic, from what I’ve been able to gather.”

Gavin scoffed. “Perfect. I’m familiar with that type.”

For maybe the first time since Gavin had first met Nines, the android’s LED flickered red before settling back on blue. “Even so….”

“Nines.” Gavin met the android’s eyes and neither of them flinched away. “Nothing he could say to me would be something I’ve never heard before.”

Again, that red glow flashed on Nines’ temple, this time sticking to a soft yellow. “If you understand the circumstances, then I suppose I won’t be able to stop you."

Gavin smirked. “You catch on fast, tin can. C’mon.” He rose from his chair and placed his palm on Nines’ desk. “Grab that bastard for me. I’ve got a few things to say to him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that highway number is based on me looking at a cross-section of a map of detroit and guessing where the police station in the actual game is and what the nearest highway would be and the last number in Connor's serial number is 52 because I only died once in my playthrough and so that's what I'm going with for this fic too lol
> 
> Also, I'm not sure if I'll be able to get a chapter up tomorrow! I'll be very busy with school and homework, so hopefully I'll be able to post a chapter within the next two or three days (here's hoping for two)!
> 
> Thank you all so much for your patience and for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	6. Disadvantage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wouldn’t call himself nervous, but the tremors in his fingertips said otherwise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for waiting everyone! God this chapter was difficult to write, but I pushed through it! Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Also, I have a huge announcement!!!!
> 
> BIG FUCKIN SHOUTOUT to @monny365 on Instagram for drawing fanart for this fic!!!! Go check it and the rest of their art out, they're absolutely amazing!!!!!  
> https://www.instagram.com/monny365/?hl=en

Gavin stuffed his hand into his pocket and studied David Jackson from inside the observation room. Tall, broad-shouldered, and scarred, David sat chained to the table in the interrogation room, his foot tapping along to a tune only he could hear.

“You’re sure?” Nines asked from the side. “I am designed for interrogations, I could—“

“Hey, shut up.” Gavin pulled his hand from his pocket and rapped his knuckles against the recording panel. “Right now, this is my problem.”

Nines sighed. “Understood, Detective.”

Gavin flipped through David’s file one more time. Connor and Hank had been able to gather some info from the guy, but it wasn’t much. David used to work as a fireman before he thought transporting red ice was a better career choice. He didn’t have a perfect record—the scars across his face and arms proved that—and while he kept most of his scars’ stories to himself, he made sure everyone knew about one.

Gavin drew in a deep breath. He wouldn’t call himself nervous, but the tremors in his fingertips said otherwise. He closed David’s file and stepped out of the room and into the interrogation room.

David turned his face to look at him, and Gavin steeled himself as he saw the mangled right side of David’s face. There wasn’t an eye in that red and black socket, just a shallow pit.

“An android did this t’ me,” David murmured with a sly grin. Gavin didn’t reply as he sat down across from the man. “Like it? It plucked my eye right out. Tore half of my face right up.”

“David Jackson, who were you delivering your boxes of red ice to?” Gavin ignored the bullshit and tried to remember how to ride the bike called interrogation. Then again, riding a bike was difficult with only one arm.

David chuckled, dark and low. “How’s it feel, Detective? Bein’ just like me?” At Gavin’s furrowed brow, David continued. “Your arm’s lookin’ mighty out of place here.”

Gavin wet his lips. “Listen, David. Believe me, I’d love to tear out your other eye for some well-deserved revenge, but unfortunately, that’s not why I’m here. The red ice. You had _piles_ of it in your van; why?”

“Not my fault you lost your arm, Detective. I wasn’t driving that semi.”

 _Wow,_ Gavin’s blood was boiling. He stood up from his seat, the legs scraping hard against the floor. “So, what, you think talking about my arm’s gonna keep you outta prison? You _think,_ ” here he slammed his hand onto the tabletop to resist curling it into a fist, “I’m not gonna break a few of your fingers just because we’re in this pretty little room?”

David smirked and let out a soft laugh. “You remind me of myself, Detective.” He paused to tilt his head to the side. “Except, unlike me, you’re all bark an’—“

Gavin’s fist slammed into the mangled skin on David’s face. “And no bite? Was that what you were gonna say, huh?” He hissed out a quick, “Fuck,” and wiped his knuckles on his jeans. He hadn’t made David bleed, at least not yet, but the gross pink skin felt like warm mush under Gavin’s fist.

Gavin drew in a deep breath and took slow steps around David’s chair. “I want to know about your red ice,” he said. “See, unlike the last guys who interrogated you, I’ve got all the time in the world.”

A quiet, whining giggle left David’s lips. “Some of us gotta do what we gotta do.” His hands clenched around his cuffs. “Transporting red ice is mine.”

“You don’t use it, huh?” Gavin drummed his fingers against the back of David’s chair. Finally, they were getting somewhere. Why hadn’t dumbass Hank tried punching the guy?

“No, Detective. I just sell it.”

Gavin grinned. “Yeah? To who?”

David shrugged and clicked his chains against the table. “Too many people.”

Gavin parted his lips, but before he could get a word out, David jumped from his chair and slammed Gavin against the wall, his fingertips red and a bloody pin on the table.

Before Gavin could comprehend any more stimuli, Nines appeared in his vision and wrenched David away, knocking him back to the table and re-chaining his wrists in what seemed like half a second of time.

“Quite the escape artist,” Nines said, monotone as he plucked the pin from the table. He examined it for a moment, the blood coating it making it shimmer in the light. “Are you alright, Detective?”

Gavin coughed and rubbed the back of his head. “I, uh…. Yeah.” Dazed, he walked to the other side of the table, this time keeping an eye on David’s hands.

“Nice pet,” David said, jerking his chin toward Nines. “How much it cost?”

“We’re not talking about him. Last chance to give me my information, David.” Gavin tried to ignore the adrenaline in his blood that made it oh so tempting to knock this bastard out.

David let out a huff. “I ain’t saying shit with that thing in here.”

Gavin hissed in a slow, deep breath. Punching this guy wouldn’t do much now, no matter how much he wanted to. “You just escaped from your cuffs and attacked me. He’s not leaving.”

“Alright, have it your way, machine fucker.”

Oh fuck. Oh _wow._ Gavin lunged at David, but Nines pulled him back before he could get a hit in.

“That would not be wise.” Nines tightened his grip on Gavin’s shoulder. “I doubt you’ll get anything new with that repeated tactic.”

Gavin grit his teeth, and after a moment, let his tense muscles relax. “We’re done here, then. You’re not interrogating him.”

“Understood.” Nines led Gavin out of the room, but once the android stepped through the door, Gavin stopped when David piped up.

“You should see it, Detective,” David breathed, as though in awe. “Android bodies as far as the eye can see. Satisfying, seein’ them rust in their graveyard after all they’ve done to me an’ my boys. You’d fit in well with ‘em, desperate as you are.”

Gavin didn’t make a sound, waiting to see if David would continue. An android graveyard, huh? What did that have to do with anything? But a moment passed with nothing new, and Gavin stepped through the doorway and closed the door behind him.

“Nines,” Gavin called, and the android nodded from a few steps down the hall.

“Already on it, Detective.” Nines’ LED spun a slow yellow as Gavin drew close. “There are three waste landfills around the city, two of them a dump for android parts. After the revolution, there are millions of broken bodies there, which matches up with what the suspect stated.”

Gavin frowned and chewed his lip. “So…what do you think?”

“Thirium is a key component of red ice development. It may be a stretch, but perhaps Jackson is working with others to harvest old thirium from the android bodies in landfills. I’ll discuss with Connor and Lieutenant Anderson about the new information.”

Nines turned to go, but Gavin snatched the android’s sleeve, the material cool and stiff in his grasp. “Are you…? Er, you’re not….” Gavin hesitated, words wanting to spill from his lips, but his tongue unable to form them.

Nines smiled and faced Gavin. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything if it’s too difficult.” He took Gavin’s hand and, for the longest second of Gavin’s life, stayed there, quiet. Then he pulled away and headed back to the bullpen, leaving Gavin alone.

One thought ran through his head: were machines actually capable of becoming alive?

Gavin shook his head. He’d figure that out one day. For now, he had to figure out this clusterfuck of a case.

A few minutes later, Gavin rejoined Nines at their desks after he’d made sure David had gone back to his cell. Gavin toppled back into his chair with a squeak from its hinges and spun around once before pulling close to his desk. “Fuck.”

“Work on your other cases, Detective.” Nines peered across their desks at Gavin, then stood and walked to his side. “What I said is only a guess, after all. But I’d still like to investigate the nearby landfills; I’ll get the approval from Captain Fowler and I’ll—”

“We’ll,” Gavin corrected. “I’m coming with you, too.”

One corner of Nines’ lips turned downward in a frown. “Gavin, it may be too soon—”

“Hey.” Gavin held up a finger, then stood and pressed it against Nines’ chest. “I’m gonna be fuckin’ bored outta my mind, Nines. This is still my case. I’m coming whether you like it or not.”

And, for some goddamn reason, that caused a bright, goofy smile to appear on Nines’ face. “Understood, Detective.”

“Uh.” Gavin stepped back, head rushing with blood that turned his face crimson. “Uh, well? Let’s fuckin’ go then, asshole!” He ran his fingers through his hair and sped past Nines to head off to Captain Fowler’s office.

God, what the fuck was wrong with him?

* * *

Gavin stifled a sigh as he headed out the doors and climbed into yet another taxi. He tried crossing his arms, but, well, that had no way of working, so he busied his hand by thumbing the metal cap on his stump through his jacket.

Nines sat next to him as he always did, and the taxi drove off. “You’ll activate something if you keep messing with that,” the android said after a few moments.

“Wait, I’ll what?”

“Activate one of the programs.”

Gavin tried to pick his jaw up, but to no avail. “Okay, Jesus _Christ,_ Nines, you gotta tell me this shit.”

Nines hummed and tipped his chin up. “It allows you to monitor the status of your arm. Take off your jacket and I’ll show you how to use it. It’ll pass the time.”

Well, Gavin had no reason to say no. He slipped his jacket off his right shoulder and pulled his shirt sleeve out, then pushed it up to his shoulder so his stump was exposed.

It…. Gavin didn’t like looking at it, he always felt tingles down his back when he did. Sometimes those tingles would become painful, an agony that made him feel like he was getting amputated over and over again.

Gavin averted his gaze to his remaining hand on his lap. “Well?”

Nines let out a soft hum. “Close your left eye.”

“...Okay?” Gavin frowned and looked around the cab with his left eye squeezed shut, but nothing had changed.

“Now swipe toward the left on the plate.”

Gavin’s frown deepened, but he followed Nines’ instructions and—

“Holy fuck!” Gavin closed both his eyes, but the…the blue popup was still there. “What the fuck, how the fuck—?”

A muffled chuckle found its way through the hand over Nines’ mouth. “Swipe toward the right.”

Gavin fumbled to do as he was told, and then the popup was gone. “What the shit was that?”

“Your HUD.”

“My…my HUD.”

Nines nodded. “To check the state of your arm, you can pull a status update into your vision from the plate. It’s different when your prosthetic is attached, but for now, this information should be enough.”

Gavin took a few moments to take all that in. “My brain surgery, the node—?”

“Yes. Your node is both connected to your muscle movement and your vision.”

“Oh.” Gavin pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, then pulled the status update back into his vision.

_RIGHT ARM_

_Connection: 100%_

_Strain: 0%_

_Damage: 0%_

_Remove plate? [Yes/No]_

Gavin furrowed his brow and glanced to Nines. “How do I select…?”

“I believe it’s a mix between you thinking about the selection and performing the action on your plate, much like a touchscreen.” Nines watched Gavin in interest, and Gavin had to wonder how much they actually…talked to each other during this whole mess.

Gavin sighed and pressed on his plate.

 _Remove plate? [Yes/_ **_No_ ** _]_

He found himself giving a crooked smile to his lap, then huffed and swiped the popup away. At least he’d figured that out. With a glance to Nines, he asked, “Anything else I need to know?”

Nines shrugged, the action oh so human. “Other than technical details, I don’t believe so.” He motioned to Gavin’s stump. “Though, generally, you can bring your HUD into view by choosing to do so, for certain stressors, it may pop up without your input to update you on any possible problems.”

“Okay, so, in English, please?”

Nines laughed, carefree and melodic. “Say, for example, your plate was damaged. A popup would appear in your vision to alert you of said damage, though you may not have physically made it do so.”

Gavin nodded and shifted in his seat. “So, what’s the whole deal with me closing my eyes?”

“It allows you to see the popups more clearly, as I’m sure you’ve noticed. Once you get used to them, I’m sure you won’t have to keep one eye closed in order to see them anymore.”

“Right.” Gavin pursed his lips. “I’m like, not…connected to the, uh, Internet, right?”

A bubbly laugh left Nines’ throat, and Gavin felt his face become far too hot. “No, Gavin. You’re not.”

“Y-yeah, of course I’m not.” Gavin’s lips drew into a tight line as he turned to hide his heated face toward the window. He hesitated, then said, “How…can you do that?”

Gavin saw Nines tilt his head in the window’s reflection. “Do what?”

“Er, laugh.”

“When you have a reason to laugh, don’t you do it on reflex?”

Gavin’s eyes widened, and he shook his head and lowered his gaze. “No, I mean, uh….” A sigh. “Before this whole…deviant thing, I…never saw androids smile. You…you don’t act like a deviant a lot, but you do certain things that just….”

“I’m still learning.” When Gavin lifted his gaze, he saw Nines’ soft smile on his reflection. Gavin couldn’t muster the courage to face the real thing. “But it’s easy to be…deviant around you, Gavin.”

Gavin wasn’t sure how to reply. Instead of words, he turned his head and forced himself to meet Nines’ eyes and not look away. The silence screamed at him to break it, but Nines’ face said otherwise.

Nines reached out, the skin on his hand peeling back to reveal the white plastic underneath. He brushed his fingers against the plate over Gavin’s stump, and Gavin yelped and flinched away from the resulting shock.

“W-what the—?” Gavin trembled, eyes wide, heart pounding. Data flashed in his right peripheral, most blue, some red. He lifted his shaking hand to cover his left eye.

_01011001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01101000 01101001 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101000 01101111 01110111 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100110 01100101 01100101 01101100_

Raw binary flooded his vision so much he couldn’t see the seat in front of him. “The fuck d-did you—?”

Nines placed his hand, now with its skin back on, on Gavin’s shoulder. “Sorry, I got…carried away. It’ll pass. Deep breaths.”

Gavin tried to even out his breathing, and sure enough, the binary cleared to a few new lines in the far corner of his vision:

_01011001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01100110 01100101 01100101 01101100 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101001 01110110 01100101_

Those wouldn’t disappear, no matter how long Gavin waited. They gave off a gentle blue glow that, for some reason, made Gavin not want to get rid of it just yet. When he lifted his gaze back to Nines, he noticed a faint blue tint across his cheeks. And, for some reason, Gavin couldn’t look away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow American readers! I won't be writing while I spend time with my family, so I don't think I'm gonna be able to post another chapter until next week. 
> 
> Also, to ease a bit of the workload off my shoulders, from here on out I think I'm gonna try posting chapters once a week! My classes are getting closer to finals and just last night I had a dream where I got an 18% on one of my tests, so XD If I'm not too busy, I'll definitely try to post more than one chapter a week! But for now, I'm gonna try to stick to this schedule so I can also have enough time to edit and make sure the chapters are as high of a quality as I can make them. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! All your comments and kudos make me SO happy and I really can't thank you all enough!!!


	7. Complications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, a cult. Gavin and Nines had stumbled upon a cult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh;;;; hi lol I wrote this in a day,,,,, um my end note from the last chapter still stands though, this chapter is the only exception (for now) lmao I hope you enjoy! I feel like I rushed this but oof—

“We’re here,” Nines murmured, and Gavin felt a rush of…disappointment.

“Oh. Oh, right.” Gavin shook his head and rubbed his eyes, as if that would somehow clear the code from his vision. He felt, more than saw, the taxi slow to a stop, and once it did, Gavin flung open the door and hopped out.

The cold, dead air weighed on Gavin’s lungs as he took a big gulp of it. It hadn’t started to snow yet, but the gray clouds overhead couldn’t mean anything else. He took in the city skyline, all the skyscrapers and bright lights so small at this distance. Then he turned and looked at the giant pit in the earth, the color of dead grass. Piles of metal and plastic littered the area for what seemed like miles, the waste glinting under the little amount of sunlight.

Gavin wet his lips, then looked back toward the cab. “Where do we start?”

Nines stepped to the edge of the incline, his LED spinning a slow blue. “The nearest heat signature is approximately two miles away. I suggest we find the source.”

“Oh my God, you can read fuckin’ heat signatures?” Gavin groaned and lifted his hand to his forehead. “Of course you can, what am I saying…. Whatever. What’s the plan?”

“Be discreet and follow me.” Nines stepped back from the incline’s steep edge and slipped off his jacket, revealing the form-fitting black turtleneck underneath.

Gavin sputtered and turned away. “Th-the fuck are you doing?”

Nines let out a huff of a laugh. “It’s difficult to be discreet when you’re wearing a glowing blue armband and triangle on a bright white jacket, Detective.”

Right. Of course. Gavin nodded and tapped his foot against the gravel of the old road. “Yeah, yeah, right. Hurry up, then.” He stepped off the edge and slid down to the bottom of the landfill, tripping at the end but catching himself right before he could fall face-first onto the dirt. Gavin steadied himself and looked up just as Nines skated down the incline and slowed to a stop with perfect balance. Damn androids.

Nines waved for Gavin to follow him, and then they set off through the walls of old junk. Gavin mimicked Nines’ movements with imperfect precision, some of the garbage piles so close together they had to squeeze through, cold, wet gasoline and who knew what else rubbing onto Gavin’s jacket. He tried not to gag at the smell, sharp beneath his eyes.

What was worse, though, were the hundreds of android parts lying scattered throughout the area. On the ground, within the piles of waste, some still able to twitch and shudder as Nines and Gavin walked past.

Gavin shivered and picked up his pace, but it only grew worse the deeper they went. Now android torsos and even full bodies littered the ground, some embedded in the walls. Gavin gulped. “H-how much longer…?”

“We’re more than halfway there,” Nines whispered back. “It’ll be okay, just don’t—”

A white and gray android torso stuck in the wall powered on as they drew closer, and Gavin let out a shriek before it was cut short by Nines’ hand, firm over his mouth. Nines kept his eyes on the old android and tried to sidestep past it, dragging Gavin along, but the broken android wailed, static cutting through its voice.

“No more,” it cried, and Gavin gripped Nines’ arm hard, his eyes wide, breathing heavy against Nines’ hand. “Please, I h-h-ha-hav—” Its voice powered down, though it still twitched and tried to form words with its cracked lips.

Nines pulled Gavin through the rest of the narrow path and released his hold on Gavin once it opened up to a moderate clearing. But Gavin didn’t move away—he drew closer, fingers grasping the fabric of Nines’ shirt. “Wh-what the _fuck_ was—?”

Nines didn’t reply yet; instead, he lifted his hand and brushed his fingers over Gavin’s hair in slow, soothing motions. Gavin would be lying if he said he didn’t melt into the touch. “It’s alright, Gavin.” He lifted his free hand to Gavin’s stump, and though his jacket covered the metal plate, Gavin still felt a jolt of information, not as sharp as a direct touch.

Blue flooded his vision, and whatever Nines did helped Gavin relax his tense shoulders. There wasn’t any binary this time, just a soft glow that pulsed in time to Nines’ hear….

Gavin’s entire body seemed to be on fire, and he pulled away with trembling fingers. “I-I’m fine, uh, _fuck,_ um, I won’t do that again. Let’s go; it was, uh, this way, right?” He took a few steps in the direction he thought was the right way, and the chuckle he heard from Nines made him want to dig a hole in one of the garbage piles and die.

“Right.” Nines took the lead once more, and Gavin let out a breath when Nines no longer looked at him.

Christ, he was fucked.

Yet, they pushed on, Nines ignoring the handful of moving android bodies they came across, half-dead and pleading for an end. Tremors prickled at Gavin’s back and he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the twitching corpses.

“I-isn’t there something we could…?”

Nines shook his head. “There’s too many. They’ll run out of power eventually; it’s not worth it.”

“How do you know?” Gavin bit his lip and glared at Nines’ back.

“I….” Nines turned around and met Gavin’s gaze. “I don’t.”

Gavin grit his teeth and shoved Nines forward, a strange satisfaction filling him as the android stumbled. “At least you’re honest. Keep going, tin can.”

Nines righted himself a moment after and gave Gavin a strained smile. “Understood. This way. Be quiet now, we could find the heat source at any moment.”

Gavin nodded and forced the underlying fear out of his system. Who knew what type of person they’d meet out here.

Soon, they came upon another clearing, and Nines flinched back and held his arm across Gavin’s chest. Nines raised a finger to his lips, then pointed to the back of a kneeling man at the far side of the clearing.

“What should we do?” Gavin breathed, his words softer than a whisper.

Nines’ LED spun yellow before he reached into his back pocket and took out his handgun. Gavin’s eyes widened, and he started to hiss out a few choice words about how the fuck a gun made anything work, but Nines rammed his shoulder into Gavin, and he fell to the ground of the clearing with a loud grunt.

Gavin wanted to scream out a nice ‘what the fuck’, but he held it back to groan in pain, then tried to lift himself off the ground.

“Who’s there?”

Gavin snapped his gaze up to the man on the other side of the clearing, the man now turned and looking in his direction. Oh, fuck. No turning back now. “Um, I didn’t mean to scare you, I, uh—“ He held up his hand and took a few steps toward the man. “I, um, I think I’m lost.” Fucking great excuse, Gavin.

But the man nodded and said, “Come, no need to be afraid.”

Who said he was the scared one? But Gavin gulped and took a hesitant step forward, then another, until he stood a few feet from the man. And, now that Gavin was close enough, he saw pale cataracts over the man’s eyes, over what looked to be a once-brilliant green.

“Give me your hands, son,” the old man said as he held out his own. “What is your name?”

Oh, God. Gavin gulped and gave the man his hand, then tried to recall the fake name he thought to use for undercover operations. “Um, Cain.” Then the old man’s gray brow furrowed after a moment. “I, uh, I only have one hand. So.”

The man nodded, his confusion disappearing. “Many of us have lost one thing or another here. How did this happen?”

Gavin chewed on his lip and tasted the metallic tang of blood. With the thought of David, he said, “An android did it to me.”

At that, the man smiled. “Fear not, Cain. You’ve stumbled upon a sanctuary for people just like you.” The man squeezed Gavin’s hand, then lifted his bony hand to Gavin’s right shoulder, feeling down until—

“Don’t,” Gavin choked, flinching back. “Don’t touch it.”

With a solemn frown, the man nodded. “I apologize. My hands are my eyes, you see.”

“Yeah.” Gavin wet his lips and glanced back to where Nines hid behind a pile of trash. “What do…what do you mean, ‘sanctuary’? I don’t understand.”

“You said you were lost,” the man said, quiet. He motioned to the mountains of waste surrounding them. “From the ruins of the machines, we’ve created a haven for humans wronged by them. Here, you’ll find a family to help you through your traumas.”

So, a cult. Gavin and Nines had stumbled upon a cult.

Gavin let out a humorless chuckle and made a mental note to shoot Nines in the foot once he got out of this. “Where do I sign up?”

* * *

One day. One day had passed since Gavin fucking joined a cult. Even though it pissed him off, Gavin still found use in his accidental undercover mission. Fifteen—sixteen, now that Gavin had been forced into this—strong, everyone in the group had their own collection of handy information.

Dean, for example—the old man with cataracts that Gavin first met. He was boring and creepy as hell, but the easiest to get information from. Gavin would walk out with him to other areas of the landfill to find android bodies and harvest any last drop of thirium they had. Each time they came across one, Gavin begged to any god out there that the corpse wouldn’t move. But the ‘chore’ let him ask Dean about anything he could think of that, of course, wouldn’t raise any suspicions.

Nines’ guess had been right. Guess that’s what you got from the most advanced model from CyberLife. The group hiding out in this maze of garbage got their income from selling red ice, the main ingredient of thirium one they harvested themselves.

Gavin let out a sigh as he leaned back against the wall of the camp. Right now, all he could hope for was for the DPD to figure something out for him. Nines’ initial plan royally fucked up, so Gavin just had to wait.

He flicked his gaze around the camp, then stuffed his hand down his right sleeve and swiped on his arm plate.

_December 21, 2038_

_12:57:39_

Gavin had to admit, that damn thing sure was handy. He messed around with it a bit more and pulled up the old binary code Nines had shocked him with yesterday. It still glowed that soft blue, easing Gavin’s worries of what the fuck he was supposed to do here, trapped.

He wouldn’t have to worry for much longer anyway, for when Gavin reached the twenty-fifth hour of his impromptu mission, he received an unexpected surprise.

“We got another one, fellas!” Gavin lifted his head to see Tyler—a younger man without a left leg—run through the camp as fast as he could on ancient crutches. Gavin couldn’t see too well at this distance, but Tyler turned around to talk to whoever the newcomer was as a handful of people began to gather around him.

Well, shit. Gavin let out a grunt as he hefted himself up and investigated the commotion.

And he choked.

Nines stood tall with an awkward smile as so many people came up to him. He lifted his hand—his only one, Gavin noticed, the android’s whole left arm removed up to the shoulder—in a small wave, his ring finger missing.

Gavin met Nines’ eyes for half a second, and Nines’ smile became more genuine, relaxed. He turned to address a few other people, his LED missing. For some reason, that caused a strange, sick feeling twist in Gavin’s gut.

Tyler reached his hand out in front of Nines to keep some distance between the android and the others of the camp. “Hey, c’mon now! Give him his space.” He huffed and took a breath, then looked to Nines. “Go on, tell ‘em your name! We’re your family now, no need to be shy or feel out of place.”

Ironic.

Nines nodded and faced the group. “Nice to meet you all,” he said, shy, a tone that reminded Gavin of Connor. “I’m Richard Reed.”

Gavin couldn’t even fucking listen to anything else that fucking android said because he was too busy trying not to combust right then and there. By the time he composed himself, most of the others had dispersed and gone back to their jobs, and Nines stared at him, his expression blank. Tyler then led him to the middle of camp to meet their leader, like they had done with Gavin yesterday.

The leader…. Gavin shuddered just thinking about him. Known as Zeus, the leader was more of a mascot than anything else. Both of his legs were amputated above the knee, and he had no ear on the left side of his head, just a flat scar that carried over to make him half blind in his left eye. Well into his late seventies, Zeus didn’t go out from the small shack his followers made for him unless it was necessary. He didn’t have a wheelchair or anything, so either one of his followers would carry his frail body out, or he’d crawl to lean against the outside of his doorway.

Gavin shook his head and headed back to his spot against the wall, somewhat hidden from the others. He closed his eyes and tried to even out his pounding heartbeat and rapid intake of air. A minute or so passed without much changing, and he tried to hold back a frustrated groan.

“Cain!” Tyler’s voice cut through Gavin’s thoughts, and Gavin opened his eyes to see Tyler coming up to him, Nines in tow. “You meet Richard yet?”

“Not personally,” Gavin said with as much of a monotone as he could muster.

Tyler laughed hard enough to throw him off-balance on his too-tall crutches. “Well, perfect! Mind showing him around for me? I’m starting to shake so much I can barely move my arms.”

Gavin nodded and stood. “Yeah, of course. Go rest up, Ty.”

In the moments when Tyler left, Gavin’s heartbeat pumped loud in his ears. When Tyler was far enough away, Gavin grit his teeth and slapped Nines across his dumbass face. “Nice name,” Gavin muttered. “Dick suits you.”

Nines laughed as he rubbed his cheek, and God, that sound made all of Gavin’s worries float away. “It’s a pleasure to meet you too, Cain.”

“Yeah, yeah. Bitch.” Gavin shot Nines a wry grin. “C’mon, I’ll show you around camp, newbie.”

“Newbie, hmm?” Nines fell into step beside Gavin as they walked around the camp’s perimeter. “How long have you been here?”

Gavin rolled his eyes. “Well, let’s see…. Approximately twenty-five hours and twenty-one minutes.”

Nines let out a soft laugh and nudged Gavin’s side with his elbow. “Hey, you’re still new yourself!” He grew quiet then, his smile fading. In a voice lower than a whisper, he said, “Fowler is prepping a full arrest; we should be back home before Christmas.” At that, Nines’ smile came back. “What information have you been able to gain?”

“Oh, buddy,” Gavin smirked, an evil glint in his eye. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask since you first met me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nines likes Gavin's last name uwu
> 
> also i didn't mean to add christmas into this i swear, spare me lmfao


	8. Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You like it when I touch you,” Nines murmured after a moment, and all of Gavin’s muscles froze up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back again
> 
> ur right it's me
> 
> Uhhhhh so I feel like this is kinda rushed again which is annoying but oops lol. I read this over like four times so I really hope this is at least satisfactory. Also on a totally (totally) unrelated note, I, uh, I think I suck at slow burn

Out of all the information Gavin had been able to get, the reason for this group’s beginnings had been the easiest to learn more about. Cast out by society because of their beliefs, the people that formed this gathering had two things in common: one or more major injuries, and a deep hatred of androids.

Gavin’s gaze flicked about the area, back and forth, his heart pumping at an almost painful rhythm. “This is so fucking suspicious.”

Nines shrugged, face turned straight ahead as he sat beside Gavin. “It’s only as suspicious as you make it, Cain.”

“Oh my god.” Gavin started to roll his eyes, but sucked in a hiss when Nines’ hand sparked over the plate on his stump. Binary crashed into his vision, numbers dancing over his eyes and blurring out everything else. Blinking again and again didn’t clear the code, but Gavin couldn’t stop the reflex as Nines ‘extracted’ data from him.

Then Nines removed his hand and Gavin coughed, trembling, and took a big gulp of air. Gavin clutched the metal bench beneath him and loosened his grip once the lines of binary began to fade away. He’d examine that residual data when—

Wait, what the fuck was he thinking?

“It’s different than usual,” Nines said, thoughtful. “We’ll have to ask about the full extent of your data storage and capabilities when we have the time. You have nothing organized; we’ll have to remedy that.”

Gavin groaned and tipped his head back against the wall. “Did you get what you needed or not, dick?”

Nines tried to hold back a laugh. “Yes. Thank you.”

“Uh, yeah, whatever.” Gavin stood on weak legs and busied himself by smoothing out his clothes, then held out his hand to Nines. “We have to get back, or—”

“Yes.” Nines took Gavin’s hand with a smile. A blanket of warmth settled down Gavin’s back, and he ignored it as he helped Nines stand. “What should I do?”

Gavin gulped and didn’t move when Nines didn’t pull his hand away. “Well, uh, I was gonna head out with Dean again today—you know who I’m talking about, right? Of course you do—and, um…you can come along, if you want.”

Nines let out a hum. “I’ll follow Tyler for now. Spreading out could help us gain more information.”

“Oh, oh right.” Gavin nodded and took a step back, his hand now fiddling with the zipper of his jacket, his warm palm tingling with the sudden cold. “Uh, yeah, sounds good. Have, uh, fun with that.”

Nines frowned, but said nothing. “See you soon.”

“Oh my god you’re annoying, just go.” Gavin pushed Nines’ shoulder, then stepped past him to go find Dean and head out to find more thirium. The thought sent a trickle of ice down his back. Taking apart androids and hoping they weren’t ali…activated was a dangerous job indeed.

Once Gavin found Dean and they headed out of the base camp, the nervous weight on Gavin’s shoulders grew…worse. The quiet clinks of Dean’s walking stick in Gavin’s empty ears drove his thoughts mad. Nines wouldn’t be found out, right? He wasn’t an idiot—too much of one, at least. He’d be fine. He’d be fine.

“...Or am I wrong?”

“Uh, what?” Gavin snapped out of his tunnel vision and turned to Dean. “Sorry, I, um….”

Dean shook his head and tapped his stick against the ground more times than needed. “No, I know you hate them things. Would give me a fright too, if I could see.” He laughed. “Hit ‘em hard on the circle in their chest and they’re down.”

Gavin knew that long before Dean told him. He hummed in response, then asked, “What did you ask, before?”

“Ah, right. You and that new guy, Richard?”

Ice settled in the pit of Gavin’s stomach. “Yeah? What about him?”

“I was talking with some of the others, an’ we’re glad you two are getting along. We know it can be tough out here, but with a buddy, it’s not so bad.” Dean let out a soft chuckle. “I know it’s hard to get to know everyone when you’re always following me at my heel. Still, I’m glad you chose to help out an old man like me.”

Oh. “No, I—” Gavin frowned, then after a moment, put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “You’ve…taught me a lot, Dean. It’s nice talking with you.”

Dean shook his head. “You don’t have to suck up to me, Cain.”

“I’m not,” Gavin said, and he…meant it. “I…. At first I was…I was scared and didn’t know what to do, but you taught me most of what I know now.” It wasn’t a lie, but there was a sincerity in it that Gavin himself couldn’t believe.

“You’re a good kid, Cain.” Dean stepped over a severed android arm and stopped, using his stick to feel around the area. “C’mon, help me find some thirium. Tell me if I miss anything.”

Gavin hummed. Like this, maybe Dean wasn’t as weird as he’d thought.

An hour or so later, they came back to camp with Gavin’s mood lighter than usual and a whole jar full of thirium. None of the android bodies they came across had sprung up like a monster struck by lightning, and even though Gavin had to steal thirium from the bodies, at least none of them had talked to him while he did it.

Dean had left to deliver the jar to the 100% illegal red ice lab while Gavin headed off to find Nines and Tyler. Snowflakes floated down from the sky and settled in Gavin’s hair as he peered around a wall of one of the many shacks in the camp. There, sitting around a crackling fire in the sliced top of an upturned oil drum, were Nines and Tyler.

“And it sliced my leg right off,” Tyler was saying, eyes wide in the drama. “I swear, I didn’t even know it. Scared the shit outta me, though. What about you?”

Gavin came up to them as Nines replied. “I was a security guard of an android store,” he began, his gaze flicking toward Gavin as he took a seat on the ground across from him. “I worked the night androids raided the store to ‘free’ them, or whatever. One of them got too rough when trying to get past me, and it chopped my finger right off.” Nines lifted his hand to examine it. “I still kept getting in their way, though, so they broke off a huge piece of glass from the windows and—” He chopped over his missing arm with his hand. “—sliced it clean.”

“Shit, man.” Tyler, jaw agape, nodded along with Nines’ bullshit story. “You sure as hell look like a security guard.” He waved to Gavin. “Cain! You heard all that?”

Gavin nodded. “I’ve been here for the whole story, Ty.”

Tyler snorted and brushed him off. “Well, then how’d you lose _your_ arm?”

Gavin lowered his gaze, his fingertips brushing over his right sleeve. “Car accident,” he muttered.

“Oh, come on, give us more details!” Tyler grinned and rested his head in the palms of his hands. “We’re family, it’s okay. There’s nothing you have to be nervous about!”

Nines shook his head and nudged Tyler, then turned to Gavin. “It’s new, isn’t it.” Not a question.

Gavin nodded, relief removing the tension in his shoulders. “I— Yeah. I don’t like thinking about it.”

“Oh, I’m…sorry.” Tyler’s thin lips pulled downward into a frown. “Can I ask how long ago?”

“Feels like a week and a half,” Gavin said, quiet. “But, uh, I was in a coma for a while, so longer.”

Tyler’s eyes widened. “Shit, man. The fuck did you hit?”

Gavin grit his teeth and curled his fingers into a fist. “I really don’t wanna talk about this anymore.”

“Oh, yeah, um, I’m sorry.” Tyler looked away, downcast, then put his arms behind him and leaned back. “Uh, well….”

Nines smiled. “Do either of you like cats?”

At that, Gavin gave Nines a broad grin. “You bet your ass I do.”

And even when the sun had long set and the wind picked up with thick gray clouds across the sky, the three of them stayed huddled around that fire in an oil drum. Snow now came down in thick sheets to scatter across Gavin’s hair and shoulders, and while the fire soothed his trembling body, an icy breeze kept up a steady rush against his back.

That was the only reason Gavin huddled close to Nines, of course. Because he would freeze to death otherwise.

Gavin hissed out a, “Shit,” as a strong gust blew more snow onto his shoulders and almost blew out the fire. Nines wrapped his arm around Gavin’s waist and pulled him flush to his side. If Gavin hadn’t been so cold, he would’ve hated how fast his body heated up at the contact.

Nines himself, Gavin knew, couldn’t quite feel the cold, but his shoulders trembled anyhow. At least the inner workings of his biocomponents gave off some heat for Gavin to steal. “Where do you sleep?” Nines said after a moment, eyes trained on Gavin’s blue-tipped fingers. “We should get out of this wind and into one of the shacks. I doubt this weather will let up.”

“Yeah, y-yeah, here, this way.” Gavin shuddered and exhaled a hot breath over his hand, then waved to a sleepy Tyler and turned to head to one of the many metal shacks in the camp.

Built against the wall of waste, Gavin’s shack had enough room for him to lie down without curling up into a ball. With how cold it was and having to accommodate Nines as well, though, Gavin laid down on the tattered blanket over the ground and curled into his jacket, his gaze focused on Nines standing in the doorway. “C-c’mon, I feel like I-I’m gonna freeze t’ death,” he said, teeth chattering no matter how hard he tried to keep his jaw still.

Nines stepped into the shack and pulled the large sheet of metal that acted like a door over the doorway. The breeze that had annoyed Gavin before the sun had set had now become an incessant gale, and though the shack had its share of drafts, the metal ‘door’ was better than nothing.

Nines laid beside Gavin and wrapped his arm around Gavin’s torso, then pulled the man flush to his body, his hand rising to play with strands of Gavin’s hair. Gavin shuddered and buried his face in Nines’ chest, Nines’ strange, yet familiar scent flooding his nose. A mix of new metal, cats, and something warm and smoky, Nines’ smell lulled Gavin into a calm daze and one thought: home.

“You like it when I touch you,” Nines murmured after a moment, and all of Gavin’s muscles froze up.

“I-I—”

“Your body temperature rises by at least two degrees whenever I touch you.” Nines tightened his grip in Gavin’s hair and pulled Gavin’s head back to meet his gaze with an innocent smile. Gavin couldn’t hold back the whine that left him, his eyes wide. “As per the current weather, I suggest I touch you as much as possible in order to ensure you don’t freeze.”

Gavin couldn’t breathe, his inhale a sharp squeak. “I-I swear to _fucking_ God—”

Nines released his grip on Gavin’s hair and pulled away from him, Gavin breathing out a distressed whimper. Nines sat up and looked down at Gavin with a serene smile, his fingers brushing against Gavin’s jaw. “My sole mission is to keep you warm, Gavin. Should I discard that mission?”

Gavin gulped, his hand tight over his mouth. A long moment passed before he shivered and squeezed his eyes shut, then shook his head.

Nines lifted himself up and settled his knees on either side of Gavin’s legs, and Gavin didn’t have the courage to open his eyes when Nines’ elbow rested on the ground next to his head.

“Open your eyes, Gavin,” Nines whispered, and Gavin forced his eyes open, only to gasp and turn his head at how close Nines’ face was. “What do you want me to do?”

“Why?” Gavin croaked, his body shivering from both the cold and the overwhelming heat.

Nines furrowed his brow. “Hm?”

Gavin set his jaw and looked up at Nines. “Why are you doing this to me?”

Nines’ eyes widened, and he remained silent for a few moments. Gavin couldn’t tell if the blue on his cheeks was from the cold or something else. “What’s wrong?”

“Answer my fucking question first, piece of shit.” Gavin’s words had more bite than his actions, and he lifted his hand to run his fingers over the spot where Nines’ LED once was. “You don’t wanna do this.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth.” Nines leaned into the touch and Gavin hated how a new rush of heat settled over his chest. “You’re precious to me, Gavin.”

“No, I’m not.”

Nines smiled and turned his head to press a kiss to Gavin’s palm. The warmth in Gavin’s chest grew into a fire that rose to his head and fried his brain. “I wanted to do that.”

“N-no, you didn’t.”

Nines hummed, then kissed each of Gavin’s fingers, the action slow and gentle. Why hadn’t Gavin pulled his hand away? “You remind me that I don’t have to follow the remnants of my programming anymore.”

“I-I’ve done nothing,” Gavin croaked, and the tears running down his cheeks prickled as the cold breeze blew against them. “I’ve just been a fucking burden.”

“You’re not a—”

“Don’t say anything,” Gavin snapped. “Don’t. It’s all fucking— You don’t mean any of it. You can’t mean any of it.”

Nines frowned. “Gavin—”

“Stop. Get off me.”

Nines did as he was told and laid beside Gavin, the two of them on their backs facing the ceiling. The wind whistled against the outside of the shack, its metal walls shifting and moving with the gusts. In the silence between each gale, Nines murmured, “I am deviant.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.” Gavin wiped the tears from his cheeks and let out a huff. “No normal person would say I’m anything other than a burden.”

“Tina Chen.”

“She’s not normal.”

Nines sighed and rolled to his side to face Gavin. “I wanted to touch you,” he said. Gavin tensed. “I wanted to take care of you. I wanted to see you feel better.” He shifted closer and laid his arm across Gavin’s torso and buried his face against Gavin’s shoulder. “I wanted to hold you. I wanted to kiss—”

“No, shut up, oh my God.” Gavin covered his burning face with his hand and shuddered, then turned and curled up against Nines’ chest. “I’m warm, so just let me fucking sleep, damn it.”

Nines’ chuckle reverberated through Gavin’s head. “Goodnight, Gavin.”

“Shut up.” But Gavin felt something flutter in his chest at Nines’ words, and he fell asleep to the sound of Nines’ thirium pump beating loud against his ear. He’d worry about the consequences of all this in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, relentlessly pounding on my keyboard and crying: is this slow burn? iS tHis sLoW buRn????


	9. Recognition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now Gavin strained to hear Nines’ voice, softer than a whisper. “Stay away from the others and we’ll be fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god school's kicking me in the ass
> 
> On another note, this chapter is all over the place, a wild ride. So many emotions, oh my god. Have fun with this one; I sure did.
> 
> Also, quick tip for those who read on their phones: if you can't select the binary because it thinks it's a phone number, try selecting the word before the binary begins, and then widening your selection so it goes over the numbers. Hopefully that makes any sense at all lol!
> 
> Enjoy! Haha I'm not okay!

Gavin woke to a chill that settled deep in his bones, his limbs heavy and sluggish. He groaned and stretched himself out only to notice Nines and his warmth missing.

A long-buried memory rose up from the soil of his subconscious. Gavin beat it back by getting up and surrendering himself to the cold outside. The pale light of dawn glinted off the thick layer of snow on the ground and scraps of metal and plastic, the camp quiet. _December 22, 2038. 5:34:58._ God, it was too early for this shit. Gavin yawned, then followed the old footprints in the snow to their source.

“Morning, Cain.” Nines smiled up at him from where he sat around a small fire. He turned his attention back to the…meat kebab that cooked over the flames without another word.

Gavin grit his teeth, but plopped onto the ground next to Nines and hunched over, scowling at the fire. “Mornin’,” he muttered.

At that, Nines’ smile grew. “Are you hungry?”

“It’s literally five thirty in the morning.” Gavin yawned and rubbed his eyes. “Fuck, I need some coffee….” But he let out a wistful sigh and tapped his foot on the ground to the steady beat of his headache. Soon. Soon he’d be reunited with that bitter and sweet goodness.

Nines pulled the kebab off the fire and turned to Gavin, and…was Nines actually sitting cross-legged? “I apologize for my behavior last night—“

“Holy fuck, shut up.” Gavin’s hand covered his face, red-hot at the memory. “Uh— We’ll talk about whatever the fuck that was after I finally get some caffeine.” He wasn’t sure he could handle that conversation right now. It would need a mental stability that Gavin just didn’t have at the moment.

Nines nodded, and Gavin could almost imagine seeing his LED spin yellow for a moment before it returned to blue. “Understood.” He glanced down at his kebab, then put one of the pieces of meat between his teeth.

“What the _fuck—?_ ” Gavin snatched the meat stick from Nines’ hand. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You _know_ you can’t—” His lips twitched downward into a deeper scowl. “You’re a, uh, vegan, dipshit!”

Nines laughed and covered his mouth with his hand. He leaned forward, eyes hooded, and supported most of his weight on his arm to tilt his chin forward and offer Gavin the cube of meat between his lips.

Gavin squeaked—actually fucking _squeaked_ —and shoved the side of the kebab in his mouth to shut himself up. He gave Nines a quick shrug and bit off a large chunk of meat, his mouth too full to speak.

Nines hummed and pulled the meat cube into his mouth. “It’s interesting,” he said, not chewing. “That’s all I have to say.”

“You’re a fucking dumbass,” Gavin muttered, almost choking on the amount of food in his mouth.

“Ironic how you say that to me.” Nines let out a soft laugh, then put his fingers in his mouth and took out the meat.

Gavin gagged. “Oh my God, you’re disgusting.” Nines rolled his eyes before tossing the…dripping meat into the fire and wiping his lips. “Ew, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“I salivate a lot,” Nines said, exasperated. “Like my brother.”

“Brother? Who the hell—?” Gavin stopped. Okay, he wasn’t a total dumbass. ‘Brother’ had to mean Connor, and Connor…he did that stupid analyzing thing. So, cool. Okay. Androids were weird as shit.

Nines sighed at Gavin’s revelation, the confusion in Gavin’s expression replaced with a knowing disgust. “At least you can figure that out.”

“Is that an insult?”

“I’m only stating a fact.”

Gavin laughed then, soft and swift, but a laugh nonetheless. One that held a sense of happiness that he hadn’t felt in a long, long time. “You’re an idiot.”

Nines shrugged and turned away, his ears tipped with blue and a small smile on his face. “Are those your last words?”

“What the hell does that even—?” Gavin shrieked when his face met a ball of snow, and he toppled backward onto the ground. At Nines’ string of laughter, Gavin shot up and threw a chunk of snow back at Nines, his fingers burning from the cold, but his face warm all the same. “Oh my _God,_ you fucking dick!”

Gavin scrambled to his feet and tried to gain some distance from Nines, then scooped up some snow and tried to form a snowball with one hand. Nines, with one finger less than what Gavin had, beat him to it, and Gavin pitched forward when the snowball hit his shoulder. “Jesus Christ! You trying to kill me?”

Nines laughed. “And if I am?”

“Fuck you!” Gavin let out a bark of a laugh and tossed his shitty snowball at Nines, the android letting it hit him in the arm. Gavin knew his victory had been handed to him, but he grinned anyhow, his hand wrist-deep in more snow.

Before Gavin could chuck another snowball, Nines appeared at his side and snatched his wrist, then pushed him back onto the ground.

“Ah, hey, the hell?”

Nines smiled down at him. “You know about snow angels?”

Gavin furrowed his brow, but his confusion morphed into something like glee. “You’re super fucking childish, you know that?”

Nines let out a laugh and fell back into the snow beside Gavin. “First experiences can be like that.”

At that, a shock struck through Gavin. Nines had…never had fun before.

Gavin looked up at the sky, then stretched out his limbs and swept them over the ground, embedding a print into the snow. “Ah….” He stood from the ‘finished’ angel and looked down on it, its right wing missing.

“Wait,” Nines said, and gave Gavin a dumbass smile as he made his own snow angel, this one’s left wing nonexistent. Once he stood, he nudged Gavin’s side. “Complete it for me.”

“W-what?” Heat bloomed over Gavin’s face.

Nines nodded. “Like so.” He stepped to the bottom of Gavin’s angel, turned, and fell back onto the incomplete print to sweep his arm over the undisturbed snow. After he got back up, the angel complete, Nines examined it for a moment, then turned to Gavin with a soft sort of amusement in his eyes, his perfect hair now sticking up at odd angles and full of snow. “Angel complete.”

Before Gavin realized what he was doing, his fingers had already tangled into Nines’ hair, soft and damp with melting frost, and brushed out the snow. And, before Gavin could pull away, Nines’ fingers wrapped around his wrist and locked him in place.

_01011001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100001 01100100 01101111 01110010 01100001 01100010 01101100 01100101_

The jolt shot through Gavin’s chest and his vision spun, electric static sending tingles through his stump. “W-whatever you’re doing,” Gavin gasped, the raw code sending tremors through his legs, “I-I don’t— I can’t understand it.”

Nines hummed, almost…pleased, and squeezed Gavin’s wrist. “That’s fine.”

_01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110011 01100101 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01101111 01100110 01110100 01100101 01101110_

Gavin hissed as another jolt sent a wave of unsteadiness throughout his body, and he collapsed to his knees, his head spinning and his eyes glazed over with binary. With a sharp groan, Gavin lifted his hand to his head and tried to force the code away. “H-how are you…?”

Nines knelt in front of Gavin with a smile that held both satisfaction and a hint of regret. “Don’t make this more suspicious than it already is, Detective.”

“Oh, fuck off.” Gavin shuddered, and after a few moments the binary let up. He let out a slow breath. “What…what time is it? I still can’t see.”

“6:07:13.” Nines’ eyes scanned the surrounding area, the others beginning to stir from their slumber from the commotion he and Gavin had made. “Nine more hours until we can go home.”

Until they could go home. The words rang in Gavin’s head until one echoed over and over: home. Their home.

“Finally,” Gavin decided to say as he ignored the heat rising up his throat. “When did they tell you, or whatever?”

“This morning.” Now Gavin strained to hear Nines’ voice, softer than a whisper. “Stay away from the others and we’ll be fine.”

Gavin nodded, then got to his feet and wobbled before finding his balance. “Let’s, uh, let’s see if Tyler’s up. I’ve got—“

“Cain?” Gavin turned toward the voice, his heart stalling in his chest. Zeus, his small body puny in the arms of his massive caretaker, came up to him, Zeus’ eye somewhat glazed over, lost in thought. Gavin gulped and forced the anxiety from his mind.

“Yes, sir?” Strange how such words came easy in this situation.

Zeus reached his arm out toward Gavin, but his gaze didn’t follow, just stayed locked on the sky above. “Walk with me.”

A thrum of fear shot through Gavin’s lungs, but he nodded and spared a glance at Zeus’ caretaker. He had no name—at least, from what Gavin knew—and it wasn’t like he could tell anyone, his tongue cut off near the back of his throat. Long and dark matted hair framed his face, devoid of so much emotion that it reminded Gavin of the androids back at the DPD.

Gavin shuddered. “Yes, sir.” He didn’t look back at Nines as he followed Zeus’ caretaker out of the camp. He led Gavin through twists and turns that muddled his sense of direction and spiked the tightness in his chest, his heart pounding loud in his ears.

They came to a narrow opening deep into this maze and Zeus motioned to the crack in the wall of garbage. “Go.”

Gavin’s heart beat louder than he’d like it to as he stepped forward and sidestepped through the opening. The sun cast threads of light into the near-blackness of the path, the waste above Gavin’s head creaking as he tried to make room for himself between the tight walls that dug into his chest and back.

For a moment, Gavin entertained the idea that Zeus was leading him to some quiet, secluded place to kill him. If not by falling garbage, then by Zeus’ caretaker.

And, for a moment, Gavin felt the anxiety in his chest squeeze until he couldn’t breathe.

Zeus and his caretaker sidled into the crack in the wall soon after, and the garbage roof above them groaned and shifted at the caretaker tried to shuffle through with his giant stature. Gavin tried not to think too hard about anything, the twinkle of sunlight his one solace. It danced on the uneven surfaces of metal and plastic, the little snow that had been able to fall through the cracks in the roof above glowing with the yellow light.

Through the artificial waste and his internal terror, Gavin closed his eyes and forced himself to focus on nothing except the crush of snow and metal beneath his feet and the creak of plastic bending to accommodate him.

Gavin stumbled as the path opened up, and he heaved for breath, his throat burning from the cold air. At the end of the tunnel was a small room, a roof made from a large metal grate above Gavin’s head.

Zeus and his caretaker stepped into the room, and the caretaker set Zeus down onto the ground and leaned him against the wall. Zeus heaved a sigh and closed his eyes, and Gavin fiddled with the hem of his shirt as he flicked his gaze around the room.

“What is this—?”

Zeus scowled. “Quiet.”

Gavin flinched and lifted his hand to run his fingers through his hair. He gulped and glanced at Zeus’ caretaker, then looked anywhere except those two. There didn’t seem to be anything in the room save for a flat metal block on the ground that seemed like a rectangular bench, or some type of…medical table.

“I have to ask,” Zeus said, startling Gavin out of his thoughts. “How did you find us?”

“I—” Ice crystallized around Gavin’s heart. “I heard your protests,” he breathed, throat dry, “and I was desperate. I couldn’t stay in my old life after I knew the truth.”

An emotion Gavin couldn’t recognize flitted across Zeus’ face. “I like you, Cain.” Zeus raised his hand to the scar over his head. “But….” He sighed and waved to his caretaker, who took a few steps toward Gavin, Gavin sucking in a breath through his teeth and stepping back. “I don’t believe you.”

Zeus’ caretaker pulled out a handgun from his thick coat and Gavin tripped and fell to the ground, his eyes wide, adrenaline sending tremors through his fingers. “I-I—” He stopped breathing when Zeus’ caretaker pressed the barrel of the gun to his forehead.

“David hasn’t come back home,” Zeus called, his voice loud over Gavin’s pounding heart. “I think you have something to do with that, Gavin.”

Gavin let out a shuddering gasp, icy sweat rolling down his spine. This wasn’t the first time a gun had been pressed to his head, but he could never get used to it. His eyes stayed locked on the barrel of the gun and, of course, Zeus’ caretaker’s finger on the trigger. “W-what makes you—?”

“Quiet.” Zeus crossed his arms. “I want you to give me information on your mission.”

Gavin fumbled for words, but none came out of his burning throat save for broken remnants of noise.

Zeus nodded to his caretaker, and Gavin didn’t have time to scream before a bullet exploded from the gun and whizzed past his ear, a high-pitched ringing left in the aftermath. In the distance of his hearing, Gavin heard his words, far too loud. “Okay, okay!” He pressed his hand to his ear, his limbs twitching and shaking, overwhelmed with heat. “Eleven hours,” he gasped, pleading gaze focused on the caretaker as he moved the gun back to Gavin’s head. “The DPD will surround the place. That’s all I know, I swear.”

“You’re staying with me until then.” Zeus’ voice sounded muffled, like Gavin was underwater. He waved to his caretaker, and the gun lowered from Gavin’s head. “If you’re lying again, I won’t have him miss.”

Gavin nodded as he sucked in air, each breath catching on his throat. “I swear.”

Zeus hummed, then jerked his chin to his caretaker. “Shoot him.”

“Woah! Woah woah woah!” Gavin jerked back and scrambled away until his back hit the wall. “I-I’m telling the truth! All I was told to do was go undercover, and they gave me a date and time they’d be ready for the arrest!” Gavin shrieked, going still as the caretaker pointed the gun to him again. Oh fuck, he didn’t want to die.

Zeus’ caretaker aimed the gun and pulled the trigger. Gavin bit his tongue to stifle his cry, the passing bullet igniting a wildfire in his left shoulder. It…it had scraped him. Zeus’ caretaker had such precise aim that the bullet hadn’t embedded in his flesh, only made a deep cut.

Eyes wide, Gavin looked up at Zeus’ caretaker and choked out a grunt of pain.

“Let’s get back,” Zeus said, casual and pleased. “I’m sure the others are wondering where we’ve gone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and he said that's all he knew, you know, like a liar


	10. Burden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Let the ones who wish to see us wiped from existence decide his fate.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the fuckign last few paragraphs took me like an hour and a half in itself to write oh my g od
> 
> Also I've been an idiot and completely forgot to mention— There's more fanart for this fic!! Huge thanks to @marcarella.pizza on Instagram for drawing it, go check it out!! Sorry it took me so long to mention it!!!
> 
> https://www.instagram.com/marcarella.pizza/
> 
> And as always, I hope y'all enjoy reading!

The barrel of the gun dug into Gavin’s back. With each breath he drew in, the gun’s hard edges pressed deeper against his spine, a reminder, a warning.

They stepped into camp and Gavin twitched, a single line of binary running across his vision:

_01010011 01101111 01110010 01110010 01111001_

_[S] 01101111 [rr] 01111001_

Zeus’ caretaker rammed the butt of the gun against the open wound in Gavin’s left shoulder and ripped a cry from his throat. “Pay attention,” Zeus murmured from his caretaker’s arm. “You’re quite stupid, zoning out in this situation.”

Gavin grit his teeth, but said nothing as his shoulder throbbed with pain. At least now he could start to understand and decode the binary, the numbers more familiar and less…shocking when Nines didn’t touch him directly.

Gavin held back a sigh, staring straight ahead to ignore the looks from the others in the camp. Zeus’ caretaker pushed Gavin into Zeus’ shack, then stepped inside the modest room himself and laid Zeus down on his cot in the corner. He then went to Gavin’s side and crossed his hands over his abdomen, the gun in his hand glinting with the sunlight from the doorway.

A low sigh fell from Zeus’ lips before he reached for a thin rope that fell through a hole in the ceiling. With a sharp tug, the low knell of a bell rang throughout the camp, each toll resounding through Gavin’s chest, each thrum stalling the beat of his heart.

Soon, voices gathered around the outside of Zeus’ shack, bodies blocking the light from outside. Zeus crawled on the floor, arms straining with the effort, and propped himself up against his doorframe.

“My brothers,” he called, and Gavin’s throat swelled up. “We must prepare for a dark night. In less than eleven hours, the police will be upon us.”

At the resulting cries of protest, Zeus held up his hand, and the voices quelled. “I understand your confusion, your betrayal.”

Within the shack, Gavin bit back a hiss as Zeus’ caretaker grabbed his hair and shoved him toward the doorway, his grip like a vice. Though Gavin struggled, Zeus’ caretaker didn’t budge.

“But, my brothers,” Zeus continued, sweeping his arm toward Gavin, “we have our spy and our promise of safety. The police may be upon us, but we have one of their own.”

The crowd hurled insults—fear laced in their tone—and even trash from the ground at Gavin. He covered his face and yelped as a broad, thin sheet of metal crashed against his head, then clattered and embedded into the snow below.

“Your anger is justifiable,” Zeus called, voice loud over the masses. “But do not harm him.” He faced Gavin, his expression filled with a poisonous satisfaction. “Let the ones who wish to see us wiped from existence decide his fate.”

Zeus waved to the mass of people, urging them away. “Don’t waste any time, go! We must be prepared!”

As the crowd scattered, noise filled Gavin’s ringing ears and throbbed against his skull. A jolt shot through his stump and he wobbled, fingernails digging into the skin of Zeus’ caretaker’s wrist, the wound on his shoulder searing with agony. “F-fuck, I get it, let go of me—” His breath hitched when Zeus’ caretaker pulled harder on his hair, Gavin struggling to stand on tiptoe to ease the pain.

“Release him,” Zeus said with a sigh. His caretaker let Gavin go seconds after the command.

Gavin rubbed his scalp and shied away from Zeus’ caretaker, though still made sure he saw the dark glare Gavin shot him when Gavin was out of arm’s reach. Goosebumps prickled down Gavin’s neck now that the strain on his hair was gone. He shivered, remembering Nines’ own fingers in his hair just last night.

He destroyed that train of thought as quickly as it had come.

“So I’m a hostage?” Gavin’s body shook with his exhale, cold fear slipping past the hem of his coat like a breeze. “I’m a hostage.” He leaned against the doorframe and slid down, giving a blank stare to the ground.

He didn’t listen for Zeus’ answer before he busied himself with the binary lingering in the corner of his eye.

_[S] 01101111 [rr] 01111001_

_[S] 01101111 [rry]_

Oh. ‘Sorry’. Gavin frowned, something warm lodging itself in his chest even through the terror and pain. Nines was okay. At least _his_ cover hadn’t been blown. He could keep getting info that Gavin wasn’t able to get himself, and that was all that mattered.

As two hours came and passed, however, Gavin found his thoughts becoming far too toxic, a poison that rotted his brain. What would happen when the DPD _did_ come? Would Zeus’ caretaker shoot him the second he had the chance?

Maybe he was just…dizzy. The bullet wound in his arm had clotted somewhat from him not moving, his blood damp in his sleeve. Still, it was deep, a long line across the meat of his shoulder. Without being able to put pressure on the wound himself, it was a wonder he hadn’t passed out yet.

“Bandages,” he murmured, transfixed on the dark rust-brown stain on his coat. “I need….”

Zeus’ caretaker pushed off from the wall he’d been leaning against and placed his gun near Zeus’ hand from where he relaxed on his cot, then turned and left the shack. Gavin sighed, the sound a low hiss as he drew it from his throat. For a moment, the edges of Gavin’s vision spun with black, but then he jerked his head up and drew the shack’s interior into focus once more. How much blood had he lost?

It seemed like seconds had passed, movement a blur when Zeus’ caretaker returned with someone else.

A wave of déjà vu crashed against Gavin’s chest as Nines knelt at his side and slipped off the coat from Gavin’s shoulders. Gavin’s heart leapt in his chest and he struggled to push down the frigid fear that took hold throughout his body. “W-what are you…?”

“I once worked part-time as an EMT,” Nines said to ease the panic in Gavin’s voice, as if Gavin’s worry came from Nines’ possible lack of experience and not how fucking idiotic he was for trying to help Gavin when Zeus was _right_ fucking there—

Gavin hissed when Nines peeled the sleeve of his shirt away from his skin, the dried blood over the wound pulling at the edges of his scab. “Fuck!” Gavin grit his teeth, unable to stop himself from throwing his head back, ramming it against the wall and causing black dots to speckle his vision.

“Sit still, traitor,” Nines straight-out _snarled,_ and Gavin shut up fast, a wildfire erupting in his gut. Gavin gulped hard, gaze trained on the ceiling and not on Nines’ gentle touches, his bark worse than his bite, an act for the others.

Right. An act. Gavin’s heart beat loud in his chest, too loud, his skin prickling with the cold, yet far too hot all the same. The draft from outside drove tremors into his fingers while the heat in his head made him see stars, everything too slow yet too fast at the same time. Everything was far too…too anything, Nines’ touch setting fire to his skin, the cold air cooling him down, the terror of Zeus not even five feet away squeezing his heart until he could no longer breathe, Nines’ presence giving him a sense of _something_ safe, something familiar, and…and….

Gavin’s eyes fluttered shut, and he whimpered as Nines tied a ripped part of his shirt around Gavin’s arm. How, Gavin didn’t know. Maybe with his teeth.

Gavin’s arm throbbed when his heart skipped a beat.

_[S] 01110100 [ay a] 01110111 [ake]_

The jolt struck Gavin like a punch to the gut. He gasped, wide-eyed at the ceiling. Stay awake. Stay awake.

“He’s lost a lot of blood.” Nines voice sounded muffled, and Gavin strained to focus on the familiarity, the safety that voice brought with it. “It doesn’t look like the bullet hit an artery…. He needs some water, at least. If he passes out, I doubt he’d be able to be a useful hostage.”

A huff of a laugh left Zeus. “I see you’re an expert on that, too, eh?”

Nines had the gall to laugh, carefree, as though Gavin wasn’t bleeding out right in front of him. “I’ve had an…interesting cycle of jobs.” He nudged Gavin to lie on his side, keeping his injured shoulder elevated. His fingers brushed over the cloth covering Gavin’s stump, and clear-cut information sent another shock down his spine.

 _[I’m sorry,]_ were the first words that Gavin could comprehend, and he drew in a shuddering gasp as his mind raced to translate the code. _[You’ve lost a little more than a fifth of your blood volume. I’m uncertain how long I can help you, but I’ll do the best I can.]_

A low, keening whine rushed past Gavin’s clenched jaw, a vague feeling of wetness rolling down his cheeks. Stay awake.

A foreign weight pressed over his torso and Gavin curled into it, Nines’ coat warm and soft and…. Thoughts muddled together, Gavin drew comfort from each inhale of Nines’ scent, snow and warmth and a hint of thirium.

 _[You…confuse me,]_ Nines sent, and Gavin couldn’t hold back his quiet sob. _[I’m not sure what to feel when I see you like this, but…I like taking care of you, Gavin. Though I wish I didn't have to.]_

Gavin shuddered, burying his face into Nines’ coat to hide his burning cheeks. A tremor shot down his spine when Nines’ fingers brushed over his hair, but then Nines shifted and stood.

“Gifting your warmth to another, eh?” Zeus’ voice filled the silent shack.

Nines chuckled. “He has to be warm. I’ll be sure to do more of the heavy work to keep myself warm enough.” A sigh. “This is all I can do for now. I’ll get him some water and then get back to work.”

Gavin couldn’t see the face Zeus made, but Gavin didn’t hear suspicion in his tone. “Then get to it.” A laugh, frail and tired. “We must be prepared.”

“Yes, sir.” Nines’ footsteps started to fade away, but just as Nines exited the shack, he sent another jolt of code through Gavin.

_[I’ll] [pro] 01110100 [ec] 01110100 [you]_

_[I’ll protect you]_

Gavin didn’t have much else to hope for.

More hours ticked by, Gavin coming out of his shock with the help of Nines’ coat, the water he’d been given, and the occasional jolts of binary Nines sent him from across camp, questions asking him if he was still awake, if he was okay. Each line of code Gavin translated made him warmer, and though this situation was complete shit, at least he wasn’t out of his goddamn mind.

But as Gavin’s internal clock struck eleven, it sure felt like he was. Zeus didn’t make conversation unless he had to, though Gavin was sure that he’d been asleep for most of this time anyway. Yet his caretaker never took his eyes off Gavin.

And, when all was quiet save for the muffled noise from outside, Gavin talked to him. About anything, really: the people at the DPD, his cat, the hobbies he didn’t have, even his accident and coma. Even if Zeus’ caretaker wasn’t listening, at least talking kept Gavin sane, keeping him awake and focused on the details of whatever topic he talked about and not so much the emotions that came with it.

Maybe that recorder had been a good idea.

Another hour passed in that way until Zeus’ caretaker knelt beside Gavin, his eyes sharp with annoyance, and raised his hand over his lips and closed his fingers against his thumb. A moment passed, Gavin’s brow furrowed in deep concentration.

“Oh!” Gavin grunted as he tried to sit up, his eyes wide. “That’s— You know sign language?” He backtracked. “Well, of course you do, you need to talk somehow— Woah.” Though he sat, Gavin still swayed, vertigo sending nausea straight to his gut.

Zeus’ caretaker grabbed Gavin’s right shoulder and forced Gavin to look at him, then did his last sign again.

Now, Gavin didn’t know conversational sign language. All he knew came from knowing specific signs for when he was out in the field and couldn’t talk because it wasn’t safe. Even so, this one couldn’t be more obvious.

“No,” Gavin said with a small grin. “I’m bored as fuck, shutting up is my last priority.”

Zeus’ caretaker grit his teeth and placed his gun on the ground, pointed to it, and signed something too fast for Gavin to comprehend. All he could figure out was something like, _“I’ll kill you,”_ but then again, he hadn’t practiced in a while.

“Jesus, slow down, uh.” Gavin frowned, gaze on Zeus’ caretaker’s hands, then looked up to his face. “Why don’t you have a name?”

Shock flitted across Zeus’ caretaker’s face before it faded to annoyance. He went through his answer with slow motions. _“I don’t need it.”_

“Well, fuck, if you know sign language you can give people your name.”

 _“No,”_ Zeus’ caretaker signed, frustrated. _“I wasn’t given a name.”_ He’d said more, but Gavin didn’t recognize the signs, his hands on top of each other in fists as he twisted them.

Something like pity settled in Gavin’s chest. Though he tried to push it away, it stayed rooted around his heart. “Do you, like, _want_ a name?”

 _“I’m not—”_ Supposed? Meant? _“—to have one.”_

Gavin gave Zeus’ caretaker a withering look. “The hell’s that supposed to mean? Jesus Christ.” He sighed and shook his head. “You know, it’s annoying trying to, like, keep talking about you like you belong to Zeus.”

A strange emotion flitted across Zeus’ caretaker’s face. _“You’re_ —” Gavin didn’t understand this sign, though assumed the c-shaped hand he swiped across and down his face was an insult.

Gavin huffed. “ _You’re_ whatever that was.” He mimicked the sign with extra emphasis, then cracked a smile when he got Zeus’ caretaker to do the same. “Y'know,” he murmured, pulling Nines’ coat tighter around himself, “you're not too bad when you aren't pointing a fuckin' gun in my face.” He thought for a moment. “How about Peter?”

Zeus’ caretaker lifted his hands to sign, brow furrowed, but then he let out a sigh through his nose. _“I don’t mind.”_

“Well, cool! Peter it is then.” Gavin chuckled. “God, I’ve been naming too many people recently. I can’t handle all this pressure!”

Peter shrugged, stiff from where he knelt. _“It’s fine.”_ He glanced to the gun on the ground, then back to Gavin. _“Why?”_

Gavin cocked his head. “Uh, why what?”

 _“Why give me a name? Why give me that—”_ Like? Favor? _“—after I shot you?”_

“Oh, uh—” A deep frown tugged at the corners of Gavin’s lips. It took him a moment before he could reply. “I…don’t know.” He glanced at his lap and buried his nose against Nines’ coat. “I guess…I’ve been through so much hell and…denial, that I don’t have the energy to be who I used to.” As he drew in another breath full of the smell of Nines, Gavin smiled, melancholic. “But I dunno. In some fucked-up way, I kinda wanna see where all this takes me.”

But when the time would come for the police to start their raid, Gavin didn’t know if he’d even survive through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my boy Peter's using ASL but I didn't write it in ASL grammar, my bad,
> 
> also my finals are over soon so i'll be able to write even more once they're done ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


	11. Raid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y’know, Gavin has had some rough days. Some shitty days. But this? This had knocked down all the other shitty days he’d had and beat them up, then drained the blood from their bodies and made red ice from it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who finished all her exams uwu

When the clock struck three, Peter didn’t show Gavin mercy.

Peter caught him by the throat and rammed him back against the shack’s wall. _“You lied,”_ he signed, expression devoid of any emotion other than exhausted disappointment.

“W-what’d you expect me to do?” Gavin rasped around a broken chuckle, fingers clawing at Peter’s wrist. “C-c’mon, man, I— _grk!_ ” Peter squeezed, blood rushing to Gavin’s head, his heart pounding in his throat and against Peter’s palm while the edges of his vision pulsed to the beat of his heart.

 _“Follow quietly.”_ Peter lowered his free hand to grab his gun in his belt while his other eased some of the pressure on Gavin’s throat.

Gavin gasped, coughing as tears and dark specks formed at the edges of his eyes. “Y-yeah, yeah yeah, I g-got it. Or you’ll shoot me again.”

Peter nodded. He pulled Gavin away from the wall and shoved him toward the door, catching Gavin’s hood in his grasp before Gavin could trip face-first to the ground. It wasn’t hard to guess the next sign Peter used, though it was with one hand: _“Walk.”_

Without much choice, Gavin stepped out of the doorway, the barrel of Peter’s gun cold against the nape of his neck.

“Don’t move,” called a voice from the top of the mountains of waste around the camp. “Let him go and we won’t shoot.” From what Gavin could see, the officer and a handful or so of others backed her up.

Peter let out a huff against Gavin’s ear, then lowered his gun and fired a bullet into Gavin’s thigh. Gavin _screamed,_ choking on his shirt as Peter tugged him back and kept him upright, a shield between Peter and the officers.

Gavin swayed, though tried not to move too much as his leg throbbed, his blood splattered across the snow. It could’ve been beautiful, red staining what had once been pure white. Transfixed, Gavin hung limp in Peter’s hold, his ears ringing from the gunshot’s aftermath.

“Leave us alone and we won’t kill him,” he heard Tyler snap, tremors in his voice as he held a rifle across his chest.

Gavin couldn’t help but laugh at that. What an idiotic thought. Even if the police left now, they’d come back in greater numbers, find these people again and again whenever they’d keep trying to hide away. The blunt edge of something cold clocked his jaw, but Gavin couldn’t feel it, his head spinning as he lolled back and stared up at the sky above.

They were at a stalemate for a long while. Gavin’s consciousness faded in and out, though he was pretty sure he never passed out. Then again, what did he know?

“He’ll bleed out, you know,” came that soothing, oh-so-familiar voice to Gavin’s left. Gavin whined, the frigid air biting at his numb limbs, as he tried to face the sound.

“Hel—“ A cry ripped from Gavin’s throat as Peter rammed the butt of the gun against the bullet wound in Gavin’s leg. “I get it, I get it,” Gavin croaked, breathless, wide awake. “Oh, _fuck._ ”

The tears rolling down Gavin’s cheeks felt like icy needles down his face, his body far too cold, his leg on fire.

As Gavin’s vision spun with black, someone came through the officers on the waste mountain. Black jacket, blue armband, blue triangle. Connor. Negotiator.

Slack in Peter’s grip, Gavin closed his eyes and couldn’t open them again.

After an amount of time that both felt like years and only a handful of seconds, Gavin woke on the ground in an enclosed space inside one of the mountains of garbage, facedown in a mound of snow.

Covered in blue.

Limbs sluggish, Gavin forced himself to his knees anyhow, adrenaline and fear pumping energy through his veins. He swayed as blood rushed to his head, but a hand caught him by the arm before he could collapse back to the ground.

“You’re oka-a-ay,” Nines forced out from where he sat against the wall, blue blood dripping in rivulets from his lips, his voice surrounded in static. “This didn’t g-go as planned.”

Eyes wide, Gavin found his hand on Nines’ face, wiping his blood away as Gavin started to search for whatever wound that made him look so fucking weak—

Nines wrapped his arm around Gavin’s back and pulled him closer, letting out a broken sigh against his neck. Nines’ blood spilled from his lips, warm against Gavin’s skin. “Ca-alm down,” Nines said, grip tight on the back of Gavin’s neck. “They lost u-us in the confusio-o-o—” He kept trying to finish the word, voice a broken record, each sound sending a spike through Gavin’s heart.

“Shut up,” Gavin croaked, fingers grasping a clump of Nines’ shirt, damp with thirium. “Where are you hurt?”

Nines pulled back, somber, and pulled down the slashed, tattered remnants of his turtleneck’s collar. With most of his glaring white chassis bare, a long, dark blue cut sliced down Nines’ collarbone and further down past his shirt. The wound rose up high on Nines’ throat, thirium dripping from the intricate and delicate wiring exposed to the air.

“I-I don’t know what to do,” Gavin said around a gulp, fingers reaching out but drawing back. “How did…? No, don’t answer that—”

Nines drew Gavin close once more and buried his face against Gavin’s shoulder. His fingers brushed over Gavin’s stump. _[The second Connor got Zeus’ android to drop you—]_

Gavin shuddered, brow furrowed. “Zeus’…android?”

Nines nodded. _[The one who shot you.]_

“Oh.” Gavin frowned. “He…was an android?”

 _[Yes.]_ Nines didn’t let him dwell on that for long. _[His deviation set off the others in the camp, and they opened fire on the officers while a few turned on you and Zeus’ android.]_

 _[Peter,]_ Gavin thought, bitter.

Nines flinched and lifted his head. Surprise looked good on his face, even if Gavin had no clue what the fuck he did to cause such a reaction. _[I apologize, you’re right.]_ Then Nines smiled and rested his head back on Gavin’s shoulder, his hand rubbing circles over Gavin’s back. _[I did my best to ensure you did not receive any new wounds. I….]_ Gavin didn’t know if this weird…mental transfer could pause just like a voice, but it did, and dread coiled in Gavin’s stomach. _[As I am now is the result.]_

“Shit.” Gavin gulped and reached up to brush his fingers over the hard plastic, different from the gentle fingers over his back.

A shudder rolled down Nines’ body. _[Don’t,]_ filled Gavin’s head, red instead of the usual blue. Nines didn’t push him away, didn’t move. _[Don’t.]_

Gavin snapped his hand down, fingers cold and trembling. “Sorry. I, uh….” He gulped. “Does it hurt?”

 _[No.]_ Nines let out an exhale against his shoulder, the breath catching on the way out. _[I’ll be fine.]_ He motioned to Gavin’s leg, wrapped up with the torn fabric of Nines’ shirt. _[What about you?]_

“Uh, I’m….” Gavin frowned. “I’m okay. Th…thank you, Nines.”

For a moment, Nines’ smile seemed brighter than the light filtering down through the grate above their heads. _[You’re welcome. I will always do whatever is in my power to save you, Gavin.]_

“Oh my God, shut up.” Gavin buried his face against the unwounded side of Nines’ chest. “How long do we have to wait here?”

 _[Until Connor contacts me.]_ Nines lifted his hand from Gavin’s back and threaded his fingers through Gavin’s hair. _[It should be soon. This place is hidden deep in the landfill.]_

Gavin turned his head, warmth prickling at the nape of his neck, to examine the strange room. Warmth turned to ice.

“This is where…this is where Zeus took me,” Gavin murmured, throat tight. “The first time, this morning.” They were leaning against the strange table at the back of the room, and though the angle wasn’t the same, Gavin remembered where he had been when Peter first shot him. Gavin pushed himself up to better see the wall, the old bullet’s entry hole embedded deep into the trash.

 _[Then this place is unsafe,]_ Nines sent, the urgency in his message popping up errors all across Gavin’s vision. Nines struggled to stand, his voice box letting out a low, mechanical whine.

Gavin fumbled to his feet, hand on Nines’ chest. “Woah, woah! Hey, Nines, c’mon, be careful—” He stumbled through the vertigo, static ringing in his ears, and Nines pulled him close and held him steady. “Careful,” Gavin repeated, panting against Nines’ chest, the thirium that once soaked Nines’ shirt and Gavin’s hand now faded away. But Gavin still felt it over his palm liked a thin coating of dried glue.

 _[We’ll find the others. Come on, Gavin.]_ Nines cupped Gavin’s face and swiped his thumb across Gavin’s cheek, gave him a small smile, then turned his gaze up to the ceiling grate. He backed himself up against the wall, then grabbed one of the grate’s bars and shoved, the squeal of bending metal echoing in Gavin’s ears. Gavin couldn’t lift his slack jaw as Nines knelt, one knee up. _[Come, this way.]_

Gavin nodded and shook the useless, bashful thoughts from his head, taking clumsy steps over to climb onto Nines’ knee. “Christ,” he muttered as Nines helped lift him through the opening, Gavin hissing in pain at the strain put on his wounds. He rolled away from the opening and laid on his back as Nines crawled through.

Now without much to block sound, the crack of gunshots filled Gavin’s ears and ice settled around his spine. “Do you know what’s going on?” was all he could think to ask as Nines helped him to his feet.

Nines coughed, a new trickle of thirium flowing down his chin, and stared at Gavin for a moment, something vulnerable flashing in his expression before it disappeared. “Yes.” He didn’t elaborate. “This wa-ay.” They headed off across the plateau and slid down into one of the pathways between the piles of garbage. Nines led Gavin through the twists and turns, Gavin dizzy from trying to figure out where they were, but trusted Nines to bring him to safety all the same.

And, after what felt like hours, when the path opened up to the highway, Gavin couldn’t hold back a sob. He stumbled and Nines caught him in his arm, helping him to the line of police cars on the road’s shoulder.

“We’re sa-a-afe,” Nines coughed out to the backup officers, another thread of thirium falling down his chin, his voice laden with broken static. “Ho-ospital.”

Gavin grimaced, but couldn’t protest when two officers took him and led him to one of their cars.

Not even two steps to the cars, something large and heavy crashed onto the ground behind them.

“Nines!” Gavin turned, wrenching his arm from the officer holding it. Nines had crumpled to the ground, thirium leaking into a puddle around his body, skin patchy and glitching out in multiple areas across his chassis. “Nines? Nines, holy fuck!”

One of the officers tugged Gavin along, the other running to help Nines up. “We need to get you to a hospital,” Gavin’s officer said as he opened the passenger’s door of one of the cars. “We’ll get your android to CyberLife—”

“Well, hurry the fuck up with it!” Gavin couldn’t take his eyes off Nines’ limp form, the second officer slinging Nines’ arm across her shoulders and lugging him over to another car. Gavin’s officer forced Gavin into the car, Gavin unable to tear his eyes away from Nines even after they drove away, even when a building obscured his view.

 _[Stay awake,]_ Gavin thought for himself, for Nines, and Nines answered back.

 _[I’m n] 01101111 [t g] 01101111 [ing anyw] 01101000 [ere, Gavin.]_ Sharp static cut into Gavin’s ears and he couldn’t hold back a cry at the sound, curling up on himself, his hand pressed flat to the side of his head.

“What’s wrong?” The officer driving him reached over, clasped him on the shoulder, and cast nervous glances toward him. “We’ll get there soon,” the officer said, strained.

Gavin couldn’t hear him. All there was was dull static, like a phone still on a call that had been hung up on long ago.

* * *

Gavin would spend the night at the hospital. It was late, he had two bullet injuries that hadn’t been properly treated, and so he would stay.

Blue walls, blue gown. Blue blood.

Gavin curled onto his side and squeezed his eyes shut as a wave of nausea rolled over his gut. A little less than two weeks ago, he’d been in a room like this one. God, that…felt like forever ago.

Gavin clenched his hand. He could still feel warm thirium dripping from his fingers, could remember how it felt when his palm pressed against Nines’ soaked shirt. Gavin wiped his hand on his bedsheets, though it wouldn’t change anything.

 _[Are you okay?]_ Gavin repeated in his head, over and over. Monotone static was his response.

Gavin’s consciousness faded in and out as the hours passed, the clock on his HUD never faltering. _December 22, 19:02:11._

Y’know, Gavin has had some rough days. Some shitty days. But this? This had knocked down all the other shitty days he’d had and beat them up, then drained the blood from their bodies and made red ice from it. For the first time in his life, Gavin wished he’d never wanted to be on the fucking police force. He’d started this shit day by waking up without Nines, and he supposed he’d end it that way, too.

Though, he had to bring himself to think _why._ Why did he care? Why did he think this day started out so shitty when Nines shouldn’t have been…obligated to wait until he woke up in the first place? _God,_ why did he _care_ so much?

A long, low sigh fell from Gavin’s lips. He wished he had his recorder. He wished he had a lot of things, but….

Gavin raised his hand and threaded his fingers through his hair. If he imagined Nines here, safe and sound, his fingers in Gavin’s hair, Gavin might just be able to sleep through the night—

One final time. _[Are you okay?]_ Gavin bit his lip, listening for anything, nothing. The static in the back of Gavin’s mind went silent. Then, an answer.

_[I’m here.]_

Gavin shot up in his bed and turned, about to leap out of it, but the door to his room flung open before his feet touched the tile floor.

Nines’ arms wrapped around Gavin’s waist and Nines lowered to his knees, his face buried against Gavin’s stomach. “I’m here,” he repeated, soft, gentle, relieved, everything that Gavin felt and everything that caused hot tears to flow down his cheeks.

Gavin gripped the back of Nines’ jacket and pulled him closer, then gave into temptation and carded his fingers through Nines’ hair, just as soft as when he'd brushed snow from Nines' head. “Fuck you,” Gavin rasped. “This is all your fault.”

“I know,” Nines murmured, his fingers rubbing circles into Gavin’s back. “I know, Gavin. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I apologize.”

Gavin gripped Nines shoulder and tugged up, Nines lifting his head from Gavin’s stomach and— And tears covered Nines’ cheeks. Gavin let himself stare, Nines’ face perfect even crying, eyes not red or puffy, only…only beautiful.

“Never do that again.” Gavin’s voice cracked and he coughed to clear it, Nines’ hands wrapping around his own. “You scared the fucking shit outta me, asshole.”

Nines smiled. “I know.” He kissed the back of Gavin’s hand, and for some reason, Gavin didn’t pull away. “I…was so scared,” he whispered against Gavin’s hand, his lips soft on Gavin’s skin. “I’ve never felt such deep fear before. You…. If I made even one mistake, I could’ve lost you.” Nines lifted his gaze to meet Gavin’s. “I think I’ll be fine working at our desks for a while.”  
  
At that, Gavin couldn’t help but laugh. “You are such a dipshit.” He turned his head to wipe his face on his shoulder, then asked, “What…happened to you?”

“CyberLife repaired me. I’d preserved many of my biocomponents by shutting them down before they could become damaged, which allowed me to not have to replace this body. It also helped that my removed arm and finger were in CyberLife’s storage.” Nines ran his thumb over Gavin’s knuckles, sending a shiver down Gavin’s spine. “Someone precious once told me that humans have one life, and they can’t pick or change their ‘parts’.” He squeezed Gavin’s hand. “I wanted to adopt that same mindset, if only for a while. To better understand his point of view.”  
  
Gavin shifted, face heated. “You really gotta stop that,” he muttered, wishing to cover his face, but his hand felt too nice in Nines’ hold. “Can I…can I see it?”

Nines nodded and drew one of his hands to the collar of his turtleneck, then pulled it down. The…scar, Gavin supposed, over Nines’ neck was somewhat blue at the edges where the wound had been cauterized, but other than that, looked just like a human’s scar would. A lighter color than Nines’ pseudo-skin, the scar curled around the left side of Nines’ neck and far down beneath his shirt, where Gavin couldn’t see.

“I was so fuckin’ worried,” Gavin said, quieter than a whisper. “You had blue blood spurting outta you everywhere, and I just— I was so worried you wouldn’t come back.”

Nines stood and sat on the bed beside Gavin, his hand still holding Gavin’s, his other now resting on Gavin’s knee. “You’re the one who got shot twice.” He leaned against Gavin’s side, their body heat mingling together in familiar comfort. “I’m proud of you, Gavin.”

Gavin nodded, gulping. He found his gaze focused on the more delicate details of Nines’ face, his spattering of freckles, his bright, warm gray eyes, the smoothness of his lips—

Gavin didn’t know who leaned in first, but, well— He didn’t know. It was probably him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what a fuckin' roller coaster ride am i right fellas


	12. Together Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin almost purred at the sight. Nines looked good, messed up like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here there be porn. finally, am i right lol?

Heat. Heat simmered through every vein in Gavin’s body, set fire to his skin, coiled between his legs. Gavin couldn’t remember how they got here; all he focused on was the present sensations, each new second better than the last. Nines’ hands cupped his face, Nines’ palms warm on his cheeks, while Gavin tugged at Nines’ hair, kept him close while Gavin’s parted thighs kept him closer. 

Nines lowered one of his hands, stoking the fire under Gavin’s skin as Nines lowered, lowered, slipped his hand around Gavin’s bare back, his fingers toying with the thin bow keeping Gavin’s hospital gown together. Gasping between kisses, Gavin hated to admit how he arched closer to Nines, letting out a pathetic whine when Nines held him up, their bodies flush together.

“You haven’t touched yourself since you woke from your coma,” Nines murmured against Gavin’s lips, words monotone, stating the facts, his reinstalled LED spinning a constant yellow. 

Gavin groaned and tipped his head back against his pillow, more exasperated than anything else. His face a heated red, Gavin tugged down on Nines’ hair with a scowl. “Can you shut the fuck up for once?”

“Sorry, Detective.” Nines didn’t sound sorry. “ I merely cannot comprehend that this situation is real.”

“What,” Gavin scoffed as he pressed his forehead to Nines’, “were  you hoping for this to happen?”

He’d meant it as a joke, but Nines nodded, LED a brilliant red. “Yes. Very much so.” Before Gavin could reply, Nines closed the gap between them, his lips warm and soft, his breath hot on Gavin’s face. 

Nines’ hands roamed over Gavin’s back and chest, each touch sending sparks through Gavin’s skin. Gavin held back his whimpers and moans, his bottom lip throbbing with how hard he bit it to stay quiet. With another kiss, Nines took that lip between his teeth, and a deep groan fell from Gavin’s mouth. 

So did a moan of, “Nines,” and Gavin’s breath caught in his throat, a shudder flying down his spine when Nines let out a moan himself. 

“Say that again,” Nines whispered, his hot exhale fluttering over Gavin’s swollen lips.

“Shut the fuck up, toaster.” Gavin buried his burning face against Nines’ shoulder. “Agh, fuck….” He let out a wheeze, gasping for air, but a low moan ripped itself from his throat when Nines turned his head to suck on Gavin’s throat. “Oh, oh, Nines—” Gavin hissed in a breath through his teeth, his fingers grasping Nines’ hair like a lifeline. 

Nines nipped down Gavin’s collarbone while his hands ran down Gavin’s chest, a gasp escaping Gavin’s throat when Nines pinched his nipples through the fabric of his gown. Nines dragged his teeth across Gavin’s throat, then bit hard on Gavin’s collarbone. 

“Shit!” Gavin grit his teeth, his legs trembling as they tightened around Nines’ waist. Gavin let out a soft groan when Nines lapped at his bite mark. “Nines, Nines, oh God….”

Nines pressed one final kiss to the bite mark, then lifted his head. “I wish to continue,” he said, hair a tousled mess, his eyes blown black, his cheeks flushed with blue. Gavin almost purred at the sight. Nines looked good, messed up like that. “I want you.”

Common sense crashed into Gavin’s system, though he’d much rather it hadn’t. “Fuck,” he hissed out, regret in his tone. “I…. Christ, not here.” Gavin released his grip on Nines’ hair and leaned back against his pillow, covering his face with his arm. “Ahh,  _ shit, _ Nines.”

The bed squeaked as Nines sat back, not yet removing himself from between Gavin’s thighs. “You are hard.”   
  
“Jesus Christ, no shit.” Gavin let out a whimper of a sigh. “Just— Ugh.” 

The slide of Nines’ jacket over his thighs sent a shiver down Gavin’s spine. Oh, God. “It is impractical to leave you like this, Gavin.” Gavin whined and bit his lip, peeking out from under his arm. 

That was a mistake.

Nines pressed kisses to the inside of Gavin’s thigh, his gaze zeroed in on Gavin’s face. When Gavin fucking  _ squeaked _ at the eye contact and hid his face in the crook of his arm, Nines let out a low rumble from his throat. “Look at me, Gavin.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ.” Gavin shuddered, eyes squeezed shut as he lowered his arm to his side. “Nines, I swear to God—” He yelped, eyes wide when Nines sunk his teeth into the soft flesh of his inner thigh. “Fuck you!”

Nines laughed and kissed the light mark. “You’re beautiful, Gavin.” He pressed a kiss higher on Gavin’s thigh. “You’re so special to me.” Higher. Gavin trembled, unable to resist the urge to roll his hips. Nines shot him a small smirk and held down his hips, Nines’ fingers digging a delicious pressure into Gavin’s flesh. “Do you want this, Detective?”

Gavin let out a breathless moan, desperation causing it to catch in his throat. “You’re—” He exhaled hard from his nose. “Yeah. Yeah, Nines, please. Fuckin’—” 

“I’ll be quick.” Higher. Nines lifted the fabric from Gavin’s crotch, not allowing Gavin to comprehend the moment for too long before that damned tongue of his licked up the bulge of Gavin’s cock through the cloth of his boxers. 

Gavin wouldn’t call himself weak. He wouldn’t call himself a bitch, in most circumstances. But  _ God, _ Nines’ tongue, Nines’ mouth— Gavin wanted more, soft pleas slipping past his lips with every inhale he forced himself to take. “ _ Nines, _ ” he cried, begging at this point, knowing it, yet unable to stop all the same. “Nines, oh fuck,  _ please. _ You goddamn  _ ass— _ ”

Nines shifted his hand at Gavin’s hip to the hem of Gavin’s boxers. “Here?” he had the gall to ask, those breathtaking gunmetal eyes of his half-lidded and clouded with what Gavin could only identify as desire. Nines chuckled when Gavin bucked his hips and gave a desperate whine in response. “Yes or no, Gavin?”

“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Gavin hissed, panting through clenched teeth. “Of fucking  _ course  _ yes!”

“Understood.” As Nines pulled down his boxers, Gavin breathed a heavy sigh of relief, his hand jerking up to cover his mouth. 

Before Nines could do much else, Gavin snapped, “I swear to God if you fucking analyze me I’m going to shoot you.”

Nines’ LED spun yellow, then blue. “Analysis complete.” And, before Gavin could snap at him, Nines took Gavin’s cock into his mouth.

Gavin bit back a scream. His hand flew to tangle in Nines’ hair, his chest heaving for air. “ _ Fuck— _ ” Tremors shook through every inch of his body, Nines’ tongue heavy at the underside of his dick. “Nines, oh my God, I—” He couldn’t finish a sentence, each broken by a lewd moan. Too far into the pleasure, Gavin gave up on trying. 

Nines never needed to breathe, Gavin knew that, so it’d make sense for him to be able to take all of Gavin in his mouth like it was nothing. Gavin choked on his low whine, his heart pounding in his chest, sure Nines could feel it, too. 

“Nines,  _ Nines, _ I—” 

Nines groaned around Gavin’s cock, and fuck, that did it. Gavin gasped, broken and breathless, his fingers locked in place around strands of Nines’ hair. Nines swallowed around his cock with ease and Gavin hissed at the feeling, forcing himself to release Nines’ head. 

“M-my bad,” Gavin rasped, chest heaving for air, a rapid rise and fall to ease his heart as Nines pulled his lips off Gavin’s dick. 

Nines swiped his thumb over his lips. “I have more than enough strength to overpower you.” He smiled when Gavin trembled at that and licked his thumb. “I enjoyed that very much.” 

Gavin huffed and tilted his head back, drawing in a deep inhale. “Well, that makes both of us.” He stared at the ceiling for a moment as an array of emotions washed over him, but he ignored them in favor of basking in the afterglow. 

Nines fixed Gavin’s boxers and gown, then sat at the edge of the bed, his hand drawing gentle circles against Gavin’s chest. “Sleep. I’ll be here when you wake.” 

“Yeah, you…you’d better.” Gavin curled onto his side and closed his eyes. A moment passed. “Nines?”

“Yes?”

Gavin smirked. “You  like it when I say your name.” 

Nines’ hand paused. “...Yes.”

“As per the current….” Gavin trailed off, thoughtful. “Situation, I suggest I say your name as much as possible, to see you…disheveled more often.”

The tremor that shot through Nines’ body was so strong Gavin could feel it through his palm. “Understood, Detective.”  

* * *

Gavin could say everything went back to normal, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Most had been for the better, more or less, but, well, after all that happened in that fucking hospital, nothing could go back to its usual normal. 

Though, this brought a familiarity to Gavin’s job that he’d honestly missed these past few days. 

“ _ Never _ fucking do that again, Reed,” Fowler seethed, jabbing a finger into Gavin’s chest. “Do you know just how fucking idiotic you were, starting that damn mission without so much as a heads-up to us?”

Gavin frowned. “Hey, I got us whole cells stuffed with drug dealers. All’s well that ends well, Fowler.” 

Fowler drew in a deep breath. “Gavin,” he said, quiet, calm. Ice shot down Gavin’s spine. “You had barely recovered from your first injury,” a pointed glare at Gavin’s stump, “and then you go ahead and get yourself shot— _ twice, _ no less—and end up in the hospital. Again.” 

Gavin opened his mouth to reply, but Nines cut in from beside him. “It is my fault, Captain. I initiated Detective Reed’s undercover mission by wrongly forcing him to interact with the suspects.” Nines wet his lips, an action Gavin had noticed him doing ever since Gavin had been released from the hospital. “Instead of aiding him, I fell back. I am solely responsible for Detective Reed’s injuries, traumas, and expenses.”

Fowler’s wrath simmered down into something akin to pity. “Nines—”

“The hell is wrong with you?” Gavin snatched the collar of Nines’ shirt and shoved him back. “You literally— Christ! How the fuck do you think any of that was your fault? You can’t control  _ everything,  _ dipshit!” 

“I—”

Gavin shook Nines hard, the two stumbling, Nines an immovable wall, Gavin an unstoppable force. “No! Shut up. Don’t even  _ think  _ of saying anything.” He released Nines with a glare, then turned back to Fowler. “So, what? Do I get a suspension? Some trips to a therapist? I can handle desk work, Fowler, I’m going to go batshit crazy if I have to wallow in my apartment alone while Nines gets to buddy up with someone else.” 

Fowler held up his hand, a vein popping in his forehead. “Shut up, Gavin.” He sighed and folded his hands over his lap. “ _ Only _ desk work. If you  _ dare  _ go into the field, I’m taking your badge.” 

Gavin frowned. “Yes, sir.”

“And Nines—”

Nines stood even more at attention, his expression hard. “Yes, sir?”

“If something like this  _ ever  _ happens again—” Here Fowler leaned forward, brow furrowed in thinly-veiled rage, “—I’m transferring you to another detective. Another precinct, even.”

Something flashed across Nines’ face—complete, utter  _ terror. _ It disappeared as fast as it had come. “Yes…sir.”

Fowler leaned back in his chair with a nod. “Glad you two understand.” He turned to his terminal. “Get out.”

Gavin led their exit, holding the glass door open for Nines, but glanced back when he hadn’t followed. Nines stood, frozen as he stared at Fowler. “Nines!” Gavin called, and Nines flinched, then turned and left the office. 

They headed to the break room. Gavin slumped against the wall near the coffee machines, Nines standing stiff at his side. “Well, that fuckin’ sucked.”

“Gavin….” Nines frowned, glancing down for a moment. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, what’d I say? It’s not your fault.” Gavin sighed and shook his head. “Look, you couldn’t control what Peter did to me, you couldn’t control Zeus knowing who I was. Not everything can be—be preconstructed and executed perfectly.” He pressed a few buttons on the coffee machine a tad too hard, his shoulders tense and shaking. “You—you did good, Nines.”

Nines reached out and placed his hand on Gavin’s shoulder. “What makes you say that?”

“God, uh.” Gavin picked up his coffee cup and downed half of it in one go, it scalding hot against his throat. “You got us outta there, for one. And even with you half dying.” He coughed. “You gave me info when I was in the dark. Since you’re connected to the Internet and shit.” 

“Still,” Nines murmured, his hand trailing lower, over the hidden bite mark on Gavin’s collarbone. He didn’t say anything for a moment. “Are you satisfied with your caffeine intake?”

Gavin furrowed his brow and snorted into his cup. “Uh, I mean, I guess. Why do you ask?”

Nines stepped closer. “December 22, in the morning. You told me we would talk about my behavior once you,” he paused, and his next words came out in Gavin’s voice, “finally got some caffeine.”

Gavin sputtered, coffee dripping down his chin. “Well, damn. Uh.” He glanced around, no one else in the break room. He sighed. “Shoot, I guess.” 

“I apologize if I overstepped any boundaries,” Nines began. “I understand you were uncomfortable with my advances, at the time. I still find it hard to believe you accepted me in the hospital.” 

Gavin hissed, elbowing Nines in the chest. “Shut the fuck up, will you? Christ.” He furrowed his brow and placed his cup on the counter to rub his fingers against his forehead. “Look, I— I don’t fuckin’ know, I….” God, he couldn’t say it. “Just don’t think too much about that, got it? I dunno how you…you got so good at sucking dick, but uh, I’d be down for that again.” Gavin shrugged off his embarrassment. “I mean, uh, it’s whatever. I’m fine, so, um, you could do whatever.”

Nines cocked his head. “Understood.” He frowned, then, LED flashing red for a second before it cycled yellow. “Again, I’d like to apologize for your wounds.”

“What’d I say about that? It’s not your fault.” 

Nines stepped forward, and Gavin stepped back. “Are you certain?” 

Gavin scoffed. “Yeah, you haven’t pointed a gun at me, as far as I know. That makes me pretty fucking certain.” 

Another step. Another step back. “Gavin,” Nines whispered, Gavin’s name rolling off his tongue, sweet like chocolate with a bitter aftertaste. “If I hadn’t pushed you, none of this would have ever occurred.” 

Gavin pressed his palm against Nines’ chest as if to push him back, but Nines still backed him against a wall anyhow. “ _ Nines, _ it’s not—”

“My sole task,” Nines rasped, resting his head on Gavin’s shoulder. “My sole task is to keep you safe, Detective Gavin Reed.” Nines wrapped his arms around Gavin’s shoulders and inhaled, slow and long. “My life, as fake as others say it is, wasn’t meant to be lived without orders, missions. I have access to thousands of missions, objectives, tasks. And yet, I stay with you.” He turned, his lips brushing against Gavin’s ear, the flashing red of his LED in Gavin’s peripheral. “You are precious to me. I must keep you safe.” One of his hands lowered and brushed against Gavin’s stump.

_ 01001001 01100110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100011 01100001 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00101100 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01100001 01101101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00111111 _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhhh yeah i'm on fire now, oof


	13. Respite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before Gavin fucked up his arm, he looked forward to spending his nights alone in his quiet apartment. Yet, now Gavin couldn’t imagine going back to such silence, those memories more like a bad dream than anything real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote this like twice before I was happy with it and here we are uwu

“I’m heading out,” Gavin said, reaching over to Nines’ desk and tapping the tabletop. “Don’t let everything go to shit while I’m off.”

Nines nodded, though cocked his head and furrowed his brow. “You’re leaving early?”

“Yeah, Fowler said it’d be ‘good for me’, or whatever.” Gavin let out a sigh and shrugged. “You know him.”

“Too well.” Nines smiled. “I’ll see you at home, Detective. I’ll be sure to update you on anything new with the case.”

Gavin coughed, standing from his desk and waving Nines off. “Yeah, whatever. Uh, see you.” He hesitated for a moment, but huffed and snagged his jacket from the back of his chair, then headed out.

Icy wind nipped at Gavin’s flushed cheeks as he walked down the street. He passed leafless trees wrapped up tight in ropes of lights and lampposts laden with green wreaths, snow dusting the tops of each.

Now, Gavin never celebrated Christmas. It was just another day to him, as overhyped as it was. Yet, after work on December 23, 2038, Gavin found himself walking down the road toward a shopping district for…no reason. Well, he could think of a reason, but he’d rather not admit it.

As Gavin window shopped, he thought back to Nines’ words earlier that day, even last night. Warmth pooled in his gut at the thought of Nines’ lips wrapped tight around his cock, those same lips that told him he was precious. Sure, a hint of guilt panged in Gavin’s chest— After all, he hadn’t even suggested repaying the favor, but then again, what the fuck was in an android’s pants? Maybe he’d ask Nines later. Could be a good start to the night.

Then again, when the hell had Nines become so…integrated in Gavin’s life? Before Gavin fucked up his arm, he looked forward to spending his nights alone in his quiet apartment, the silence broken by his gentle words to his cat, her meows back at him, or the ringing in his ears when he thought too hard about his life. Sometimes Tina, too, if it was a good day. Yet, now Gavin couldn’t imagine going back to such silence, those memories more like a bad dream than anything real.

But Gavin had to admit, Nines brought something more than significant companionship to his life. Guess those were the benefits of an android that wanted to learn more about being human. Why Nines chose Gavin to teach him all this, Gavin had no clue, but Gavin couldn’t complain. At the moment, his situation looked bright.

Now, what the fuck did androids even like? Backup parts? Thirium? Gavin sighed and rubbed his heated face, his cold hand slowing his rushing thoughts. He…. Wow, Gavin couldn’t think of anything else.

With a quick glance around the area, he noticed a CyberLife store across the street, now stocked with spare parts and upgrades instead of androids themselves. Upgrades…. Did Nines need any upgrades? Did he _want_ any? Gavin frowned, hesitant, before he crossed the street and headed into the store.

An android operated the cash register, looking up when Gavin walked in. Confusion flitted across her face as she processed he was a human. “Oh! Hello, how can I help you?”

Gavin stepped up to the desk and took in his surroundings, gaze flitting about the store’s stocked shelves. “Uh, yeah, um.” He chewed his lip. “Do you, uh, do you know what, um, a stuck-up android might like?”

The cashier furrowed her brow. “Ah, I see. Hmm.” She raised a finger to tap against her lips in thought. “What model?”

“Uh…. RK900.” Gavin gulped and twisted his fingers around the hem of his shirt.

At that, the cashier’s friendly smile faded to a slight frown. “It’s okay if you don’t know the model, sir.”

“Uh—” Gavin furrowed his brow. “That… _is_ his model number.”

The cashier sighed with a shrug. “Well, I’ve never heard of it. We don’t sell that model’s parts.” She motioned to the back wall. “But our upgrades work for most models, prototype, unique, or mass-produced. The general upgrades are along that wall. If you need any extra help, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Gavin nodded and stuffed his hand in his pocket. “Yeah, uh, thanks.” He shuffled to the back wall and scanned the shelves for anything interesting. Most things were along the lines of physical touch and sensation, like full feeling sensors and more simple ones like temperature, while a few other upgrades were senses like taste or smell. An upgrade at the bottom of the shelves was for something akin to a stomach, and even though the thought of Nines being able to eat with him sent something warm through his chest, the insane price ripped a wheeze from Gavin’s lungs.

With a sigh, Gavin tapped his foot against the ground, short and rapid. Did Nines already have any of these? That thought sowed further doubt in Gavin’s mind. Maybe he’d try something else, something safer. He turned to leave, murmuring his thanks to the cashier for her earlier help, and then walked out into the snowfall.

What did Nines even like? Well, other than— Gavin shook that selfish thought from his head. Of course Nines wouldn’t show much interest in anything; he’d been too busy babysitting Gavin to do anything for himself.

Gavin shook his head once more and pressed his palm to his forehead. God, maybe that was something he could do, too. Take Nines out somewhere, show him something fun that didn’t involve babysitting an armless detective. Ease the workload from his shoulders, or something.

Gavin gulped, then drew in a deep breath. Cats. He’d try cat things.

A little out of the way, Gavin stepped into the first pet accessory store he could find, the bell on the door jingling as he entered. The scent of treats filled his nose as he headed further in, the cat section in the back. It sent a pang of betrayal through Gavin’s chest. Sure, dogs were great and all, but the fuck? Why couldn’t cats get the same treatment?

Ooh. Gavin stopped and examined a little keychain of a curled-up Siamese cat. Cute. Gavin smiled, then frowned. Did Nines even have something to put this on? Still, Gavin picked it up and browsed for more. If anything, he could, like, keep it for himself. The black and white face of the Siamese cat reminded Gavin of Nines’ dumb jacket and— Wait.

Heat rushed to Gavin’s face, but he kept the keychain in his hand anyhow. It was cute, goddamnit. He’d be damned if embarrassment kept him from a cute-ass cat accessory. He snatched up something else—a mug that looked like a brown tabby—and headed to the register. Once his gifts had been wrapped in paper and placed into a bag, Gavin called a cab and started the trek back home.

When Gavin burst through the door to his apartment building, he took a moment to catch his breath. He placed his bag on the ground to run his hand through his hair and brush out the snow that had piled onto his head, then picked his bag back up before climbing the stairs to the second floor.

Gavin’s heart leapt into his throat and he swallowed a yelp at the sight of Nines standing at the door to his apartment, frozen in place with a blank expression, his LED spinning a steady blue glow with a hint of yellow. “Nines!”

The yellow in Nines’ LED turned to blue as he turned and faced Gavin. “Ah,” he started with a smile, “there you are. I was beginning to worry.”

“You were—?” Gavin coughed, unable to meet Nines’ gaze. “Yeah, uh, whatever.” His heart skipped a beat in realization, and he did his best to hide his bag behind his back. “Uh, what the fuck were you doing?” He stuffed his hand in his pocket and fished for his keys, a cold sweat running down his spine.

Nines was warm at Gavin’s side. “Paperwork,” came the simple answer. “I also debated on calling you, but I didn’t go through with it because I was glad you had gone out on your own.”

Gavin choked on air. “Oh.” His voice cracked, and he tried to hide it by shoving his key in the doorknob and pushing the door open. “Uh, well, you— How long were you just fuckin’ standing there?”

“Approximately one hour and fifty-three minutes.”

“Why the _fuck_ were you standing out here for almost _two_ goddamn hours?” Gavin couldn’t close his gaping jaw, even when Nines stepped into the apartment and took Gavin’s forearm to bring him inside as well.

“I had no means of entering your home that did not require violence.” Nines closed the door and glanced at Gavin’s bag. “Do you need help with that?”

Gavin drew in a squeak of an inhale. “No! No, no, I’m good.” He held his arm behind his back and shuffled further into the room. “Uh, sorry for forcing you to wait for so long.” A pause. “Thanks for, like, not breaking my door.”

Nines nodded. “What’s wrong, Gavin?”

“Ah, shit, uh—” Gavin let out a nervous chuckle. “I mean, it’s nothing! Nothing, uh, _wrong,_ I mean.”

At Nines’ furrowed brow, Gavin gulped as each individual muscle in his body grew taut. “What has you so worked up, Gavin?” Was that…a hint of lust in Nines tone?

Gavin wiped his sweaty palm on the back of his pants. “Uh.” His gaze flicked about the room. “Hold that thought.” He took a step back, then turned and beelined to his bedroom. Gavin hid his bag underneath his bed and made sure it was far enough under there to not be seen, then backed out from under his bed frame. He knocked his head on the metal and hissed out a curse, but jumped to his feet as fast as he could and ran back out to the main room.

“You’re awfully suspicious,” Nines said to him from the kitchen. “Should I be concerned?”

With a deep breath, Gavin went to Nines’ side and peered at the ingredients he’d taken out. “No. It’s just…I just….” Gavin let out a frustrated groan. “Please just don’t talk about it, Nines.”

Nines gave Gavin a small, curious smile. “As you wish.” Once he gathered his ingredients onto a cutting board, Nines turned to Gavin and leaned over to give him a soft kiss on the head. “Could you get me the vegetable oil, please?”

Gavin squeaked, heat rushing to his cheeks. “Y-yeah.” He took slow, stiff steps to the cabinets to grab the oil, then turned and placed it on the counter next to the rest of Nines’ ingredients. “Um, what…what are you making?”

“Pork tenderloin,” Nines said, distracted, almost, as he poured oil into the heated frying pan on the stovetop, it sizzling at the contact. “I asked Officer Chen if she’d like to come over for dinner tonight.”

Something warm and soft pooled in Gavin’s chest. “Well, and? What’d she say?”

“‘Yes’, of course.” Nines chuckled and placed the seasoned tenderloin in the pan, the kitchen filled with the hiss of cooking meat. “You haven’t been able to spend much time with her. I hope it’s fine that I invited her.”

Gavin held up his hand. “No, it’s great! Awesome!” He grinned and nudged Nines’ side with his elbow. “Thanks, Nines.”

Nines smiled, gentle and bright, his cheeks blue. “It wasn’t a problem.”

Oh fuck. Gavin wanted to…. He glanced at Nines’ lips, then flinched back and faced the stove. “Uh, need any help?”

“It’s alright, I’m almost done.” Nines turned off the frying pan, then stuck the pork in the oven. As he set the oven’s timer, Gavin reached out, slow, cautious, and gripped onto Nines’ sleeve.

“You’re not my…my servant,” Gavin murmured, a thoughtful nervousness thrumming through his blood. “You know that, right?”

Nines nodded, turning to bring Gavin into his arms. Gavin didn’t resist the contact; instead, he craved it. Nines ran his fingers through Gavin’s hair, his other hand rubbing small circles against Gavin’s back. “You still need to get used to one arm,” Nines said with a soft tap to Gavin’s head. “If you had tried to prepare this meal by yourself, there was a 74% chance of you burning yourself, an 86% chance of you burning the food, a—“

“Okay, I get it, Christ.” Gavin sighed against Nines’ chest, and he curled his fingers around the fabric on Nines’ back. “When’s, uh, Tina coming over?”

“According to the tracker I put in her purse—“

“You put a fucking _what_ in her purse?” Gavin pushed away from Nines’ chest, his mouth hanging open. “What the _fuck—?_ ”

Nines burst into laughter, the melody of his joy a song Gavin couldn’t hear enough of. “I’m not serious, Detective.” Nines cupped Gavin’s face and rubbed his thumb against Gavin’s cheek. “You’re cute when you’re annoyed.”

Gavin choked and turned his head to the side. “Well, fuck you!” He shivered when Nines pressed a kiss to his temple. Another shiver ran down his back when Nines lingered near his ear.

“She should be here any moment,” Nines whispered, breath hot on Gavin’s ear. “I’ll clean this up, and you could do the rest of the dishes. How’s that sound?”

With a hard gulp, Gavin gave a small nod. “Fine, that’s fine.”

Nines chuckled from deep in his throat, and _fuck,_ Gavin’s heart skipped a few beats. “May I kiss you, Gavin?”

“Y-yeah,” Gavin croaked. “Sure, whatever.”

Nines turned to catch Gavin’s lips in his, and Gavin clutched Nines’ shirt, pulling him closer and parting his lips with a whine. Nines didn’t take the invitation and drew away, wrenching a desperate whimper from Gavin’s throat. “So greedy.”

“S-shut the fuck up.”

That caused a soft laugh to spill from Nines’ lips. “Patience, Gavin. I’ll give you more later.”

Gavin’s spine went ramrod straight and he gave Nines swift, wide-eyed nods. “Yeah yeah, right, of course.”

Another laugh bubbled up from Nines’ throat as he pulled Gavin flush to his body, his head finding its place on Gavin’s shoulder. “Thank you,” Nines whispered. “Thank you for letting me take care of you, Gavin.”

“Well, I mean—” A knock at the door destroyed the remnants of whatever sentence Gavin had tried to form. He gulped and stepped out of Nines’ comforting embrace. “I, uh….” Cheeks a heated red, Gavin brushed past Nines and headed to open the door.

“Hey, bitch baby!” Tina tackled him, the two stumbling back into Gavin’s apartment. “God, you’re such a dumbass.”

Gavin let a small laugh leave his throat. “I missed you too, Tina.” He wrapped his arm around Tina and let out a sigh against her shoulder. “I think I’m ready to sleep again for another month.”

Tina gasped, overdramatic and playful. “I don’t think I could handle that again. I mean, _two_ whole months with the coffee machine to myself? I think I’d cry!”

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” Gavin found his laughter fade to something bitter, relief simmering in the tight mess of his chest. “How…how come you didn’t stop by sooner?”

“We both know how you are, Gav.” Tina untangled herself from their hug, a bouquet of flowers in her hand, a too-bright balloon in the other. Then she winked, and Gavin’s blue mood turned sour. “I mean, I can’t interrupt some super-special ‘partner bonding’—”

“Tina!” Gavin hissed, grabbing her arm. “Shut up, shut up!”

Nines came up to them, his head tilted in curious observation. “I don’t understand your embarrassment, Detective. After all, she’s right. I _did_ suck—”

Gavin screeched and slapped his hand over Nines’ mouth. “You’re fucking _evil_. The _both_ of you!”

Tina let out a laugh that could be described as nothing less than maniacal. “Oho, I like what you’ve done with him. His sense of humor sucked before he started living with you.”

With a quick glance back at Nines, Gavin lowered his hand and asked Tina, “Have I really…changed him, that much?”

“Of course you have.” Nines placed his palm on Gavin’s shoulder. “Rest, relax. After all that’s happened, we deserve it.” He smiled at Tina. “Don’t you think?”

From within her bouquet, Tina pulled out a bottle of wine, a huge smirk on her face. Before Gavin could ask how the _fuck_ she hid that in there, Tina held up the bottle in triumph. “Hell yeah! We’re alive, bitches!”

Alive. Yeah, alive. Gavin turned to Nines with a giddy grin. They were alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these boys deserve to be happy, I'm not a total monster lmfao. don't get used to it tho


	14. We're Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still, Gavin couldn’t believe Nines—stoic, giggly, bad-with-emotions Nines—was sending him on a goddamn scavenger hunt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh I couldn't help myself and this turned out to be way longer than intended, uhhh happy holidays? I also didn't mean to make this a Christmas fic either lmao but here we are

On December 24, 2038, at around 8 am, Gavin had a hangover. He also had an android detective hot on his trail.

“Tina,” Gavin hissed below a whisper, sweat rolling down his chest and back. “I swear to God, when are you getting here? I dunno how much longer I can stay here before he figures out where I am.”

_“Gav, holy fuck. What did you do?”_ Tina’s voice crackled from their bad connection. Or maybe Gavin needed a new phone. _“I’m, like, two minutes away—”_

“That’s so far away!” Gavin drew his knees closer to his chest, his gaze flicking back and forth down the ends of the aisle. Space heaters blew warm air around him, his coat long discarded, his sleeve rolled up as far as it could go.

_“Oh my God. I can literally see the damn Walmart down the road. I fucking know what you’re thinking, and no, I’m not turning on my sirens just to get the light.”_

Gavin chewed on his lip. “Please?”

_“Oh, I see Nines taught you some manners, too. I wonder how he did that.”_

Gavin could see Tina’s fucking smug expression in his mind’s eye, and he grit his teeth. “Shut the fuck up, shut up!”

Tina’s laughter echoed over the crackle of the phone. _“I dunno, Gav, Fowler hasn’t written you up for your behavior in a while. Pretty out of character, don’t you think? It had to have happened somehow. Hmm….”_

“Tina, holy shit. You’d better be in here.”

_"Yeah, Christ. I see Nines; he’s by the milk. I’m hanging up. You owe me, Gavin.”_

Gavin breathed a heavy sigh of relief. “Yeah, thanks so much, bye!” He ended the call, stuffed his phone in his pocket, then snatched his jacket and ran out of the store to call a cab.

How did he get in this situation? _Why_ did he put himself in this situation? Both questions raised more questions than answers, questions Gavin found he didn’t have the courage to answer yet.

The ride to the little shop made Gavin’s heart pound high in his throat, loud in his ears. It didn’t mean anything, really. It was practical! Just because Gavin would end up giving it to Nines on Christmas Eve didn’t mean a fucking thing at all. It was a coincidence.

Yet, Gavin swallowed, his thumb running across the flat side of his apartment key. Even that lie was hard to believe.

At 8:49 am, Gavin walked into work for the first time since waking from his coma without Nines. There wasn’t anything different, or unique, about it. In fact, a strange giddiness bubbled in Gavin’s chest and throat, keeping his mood light and his excitement lighter.

An hour and a half or so into his shift, Hank passed Gavin’s desk and asked, “What’s got you in such a good mood? It’s grossing me the fuck out. Stop it.”

Gavin let out a mocking laugh. “Good mood? Me? No way.” But he perked up when Nines— No, that was Connor. Gavin’s bright grin withered into a disappointed scowl.

Hank tried holding back a bark of a laugh. “Christ, your fuckin’ _face._ ” He shook his head and turned to his partner, and Gavin tuned out their conversation, sighing in relief when they walked back to their desks.

Gavin glanced across his desk to Nines’ empty chair. Where was that prick? And, now that he thought about it, where the hell was Tina? Gavin spun in his chair and looked out across the bullpen to try and spot Tina at her desk, but nothing. Break room? Ugh, Gavin didn’t feel like getting up. He pulled out his phone and sent a quick text: _‘where are u lol’_

There was an immediate reply: _‘totally not uhhhh helping nines with stuff lol’_

Suspicion tugged down the corners of Gavin’s lips. _‘wtf does that even mean’_

_‘uhhhhhhhhhhh’_ A moment passed before Tina sent another text, this one with more detail. _‘U really like cats right’_

_‘Ya but wtf why are you asking’_

_‘and u like physical contact?’_

Gavin squeaked and buried himself within his jacket as much as he could. “What the fuck, Tina,” he whispered to himself, then sent, _‘what the actual fuck is wrong with you. What are you doing?????’_

Tina’s reply was a simple: _‘nothing lmao……. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)’_

God, what the fuck. Gavin stuffed his phone in his pocket and dragged his hand down his face. The steady, rapid beat of his heart pounded against his chest as he tried to get back to work. Closing this dumb case that he fought tooth and nail to get through was his top priority.

“Detective?”

Gavin’s heart skipped a beat, then his scowl darkened. “What, Connor?” Now he heard it: Nines’ voice was at a slightly lower octave than Connor’s. An obvious difference, if Gavin was honest with himself.

Connor stepped up to the side of Gavin’s desk with a furrowed brow. “It would be good to question some of the people from your undercover arrest. The Lieutenant and I have already talked to a few of them, and a man named Dean told us he wished to speak with you specifically.” Connor cocked his head, and Gavin had to look away. “You’re not busy, are you?”

“Well, I guess not.” Gavin heaved a sigh and got up from his chair. “How many of those guys did you question?”

“Six,” Connor said as they made their way to the interrogation room. “All of them didn’t enjoy talking to an android, so Lieutenant Anderson did most of the questioning.”

Gavin nodded and rested his hand on his hip. “Makes sense. Those fucks all got screwed over by androids, so of course they would hate answering to one.”

“The Lieutenant was at least able to get some information from them.” Connor frowned and lowered his gaze. “I apologize for my uselessness with this case.”

“Fucking hell, hey—” Gavin exhaled a hot burst of air. “You fuckin’— You, I, uh, we—”

Connor stopped at the door to the observation room and turned to Gavin with a smile. “Yes, Detective Reed?”

Gavin ran his hand through his hair. “Uh, well, you know….” God, why was this so damn hard? “You, uh, you kinda— Ugh!” He growled and pointed at Connor. “I owe you! Got that? Anything you want me to do, I’ll do it.” He gulped, lowering his hand to stuff it in his pocket, his gaze downturned. “It’s, uh, it’s the least I could do. After, y’know, what you did.”

“Understood, Detective.” Connor smiled, then held out his left hand for Gavin to take. “I accept your thanks.”

“Fuckin’ android—” Gavin reached to take Connor’s hand anyhow, but instead of his hand, Connor grasped Gavin’s forearm, the skin on Connor’s fingertips and palm peeling away. “W-what are you—?”

“I understand you tend to not take Christmas Day off?” Connor gave an innocent smile, though his words held a sly tone to them.

Gavin tried to pull his arm back, but Connor didn’t let him budge. “Um, well, yeah.” He frowned and furrowed his brow, wrenching his arm back again, but Connor’s hand held strong. “Let go of me, asshole!”

Instead of listening, Connor leaned forward, his smile dripping with venom. “I know how you can pay me back, Detective.”

Gavin stopped struggling, his eyes wide. “I-I….” Oh, fuck. “What do you want, plastic prick?”

“Take tomorrow off, for one.” Connor straightened, satisfied. “Second, follow these instructions.” He released Gavin’s forearm, then showed Gavin a holographic image over his palm. Nines’ pixelated face took up most of the photo, but a holographic note on Nines’ hand took up the other half. Written in pristine CyberLife sans were the words: _Put on your prosthetic as soon as you can, then go to your favorite coffee shop._

“I-I….” Gavin felt like something within him short-circuited, his face a heated mess. Was this what Tina had been talking about? “I, uh, I need to talk with Dean.”

Connor shrugged and lowered his hand. “He’ll still be here later today. Have some fun, Detective.” This time, Connor’s smile radiated warmth and gentle amusement. “You’ve earned it.”

Gavin drew his lips into a thin line. “Is this some—some sort of trick to get back at me for punching you that one time?”

“I may still hold a semblance of a grudge for that, but….” Connor sighed. “It’s in the past, and you’re not the same person you used to be. Whether that be a result from your accident or your growing relationships is yet to be determined.” He let out a soft huff of a laugh. “In short: no. Nines did his best in the brief time he took to set this up. I think you should follow his instructions.”

Still, Gavin couldn’t believe Nines—stoic, giggly, bad-with-emotions Nines—was sending him on a goddamn scavenger hunt. “If Fowler yells at me for this, I’m…I’m gonna pour mud in your wires.”

Connor laughed. “Go and try, Detective. See what Hank or Nines say about that.”

Gavin hissed in a breath. Goddamn asshole was right. Those two would _definitely_ kill him. “Either way? Fuck you.”

He stalked out of the building to call a cab, then threw himself into it, on course to his apartment complex. Gavin walked into his apartment and stepped in front of the cabinet holding his prosthetic’s case.

Gavin hesitated. He knelt in front of the cabinet and drew it open, his eyes on the smooth, glinting white case within the darkness. After a slow inhale, Gavin reached out and pulled the case out from within the cabinet, then popped open the latches. He didn’t give himself time to think, just took the prosthetic out from its casing, placed the case back inside the cabinet, then carried the prosthetic outside and into the cab waiting for him on the curb.

While Gavin waited for the car to drive him to his ‘favorite’ coffee shop, he examined the prosthetic. Nines hadn’t specified that he had to put it on, or anything. But, still, he was a dumbass if he thought Nines didn’t want him to wear it. With a heavy, heavy sigh, Gavin slipped his coat off his right shoulder, pulled up his sleeve, and then grabbed his prosthetic and clicked it into place.

_RIGHT ARM - Prosthetic_

_Connection: LOADING. . .25%_

_Strain: 0%_

_Damage: 0%_

_Connection: LOADING. . .50%_

Gavin blinked away the HUD popup, unsure the technicalities of it now that he couldn’t swipe on his plate. Still, Gavin gulped, the strange sensation of a right arm after so long without one almost too good to be true. He slipped his prosthetic in his sleeve and coat, the plastic and metal fingers a dead weight at his side. It wasn’t because they weren’t working—oh, were they working, Gavin able to feel the pressure of the car’s fabric seats under those plastic fingertips, the brush of his coat on the back of that hand—but Gavin’s…reluctance to rely too much on the prosthetic when he’d already lost his real arm made him…. He was scared. Scared of becoming obsolete to the machines, scared of relying on something that could be taken away faster than his biological arm had been.

_Connection: LOADING. . .100%_

_Plate Sync Complete__

Gavin let his right fingers twitch and curl into his palm. Now, how did he activate the prosthetic’s pseudo-skin? At that thought, Gavin frowned and looked down at the white and gray of his prosthetic. Maybe…he could wait on that, for a while longer.

The cab slowed to a stop in front of the coffee shop, a classic corner store that did the job when Gavin felt like he deserved something better than break room coffee, which, truthfully, wasn’t often. Gavin walked up to Magnolia Café’s doors and stepped into the shop, his nose assaulted with the scent of coffee and pastries.

Gavin glanced around, the chairs and tables filled with a handful of people, the morning rush long gone. What was he supposed to look for? Was he just, what, supposed to hang out here waiting for Nines? Gavin slid his hand into his pocket—then did the same with his prosthetic, once he remembered he wore it.

“Are you Gavin Reed?” A red-haired barista came up to Gavin, her smile gentle, curious. “You look a little lost.”

“Uh, I guess.” Gavin frowned. “Er, and, um, yeah, that’s me. Who…?”

The barista held out her hand spotted with freckles, the skin on her fingers peeling back. “Nines told me to give you some important information.”

Gavin perked up at that, then started to take the woman’s hand—nope, he had to use his prosthetic. With a hard gulp, Gavin took his prosthetic hand out of his coat pocket and held it out to the woman. His heartbeat pounded loud in his ears. His first ‘true’ interface with an android…. Even the little ones with Nines made him unsteady, what would happen with—?

The barista took Gavin’s arm and sent a short burst of information to him, any shock from the transaction absorbed by his prosthetic. When they pulled apart, Gavin looked at his right arm in awe. No strange binary. No decoding, no unsteadiness. Maybe this wasn’t as bad as he’d thought.

“Um.” Gavin lifted his left hand to his head, then turned to the barista. “Thank you, uh…Ashe.”

“No problem!” Ashe waved, her skin reforming over her palm. “Good luck on your hunt!”

Gavin nodded and gave Ashe a small smile. “Yeah. Yeah, thanks.” He exited the shop and looked down at the holographic photo over his right palm. Nines didn’t seem like the type to take selfies, but either way, warmth fluttered in Gavin’s chest at the sight of Nines’ soft smile. Gavin turned his attention to the holographic note on Nines’ raised palm. _The DPD receptionist has something special for you._

Oh? The heat in Gavin’s chest erupted up his throat and set fire to his cheeks. Special? What the hell could that be?

Gavin hopped back in his cab and directed it back to the DPD. The ride took a few minutes, and Gavin lept from the cab and strode into the department’s lobby. The android receptionist, Mia, waved him over. “Detective Reed!” She clasped her hands together, her dark brown eyes full of excitement. “It is an honor to assist you, Detective.”

“Ugh, don’t call it that.” Gavin shuffled on his feet, hesitating. “Um, I heard you had something for me?”

Mia nodded. “Yes, yes. One moment!” She reached below the counter, then straightened to place a small box wrapped in colorful paper on the countertop. “Here. Open it!”

“Right now?” But Gavin took the box, its wrapping pristine and perfect. He tore the paper off the box, then took out a black knitted hat from within. It took a moment, but then he realized the hat had small, knitted cat ears on it.

Fuck. That was cute as shit.

“Th-thanks.” Gavin ran his thumb across the soft knitting, a smile unable to part from his face. “This is—this is mine?”

“Yes, yes!” Mia drummed her fingers on the counter. “But don’t thank me! I’m just the messenger, after all.”

With a nod, Gavin pulled the hat over his head. “Still. You’re still, um, really nice for helping Nines out like this.”

Mia swayed to the quiet, happy hum she made. “It’s my pleasure, Detective. If I did something like this for Tina…. Ah, it’s such a good idea. Maybe I should do something similar for her….”

“Woah, wait. You and Tina?” Gavin furrowed his brow. “What the fuck, I’m out for a month or so and she doesn’t even tell me she’s started dating someone?”

Mia let out a laugh. “Perhaps it slipped her mind. She does worry about you! But, that’s a story for another time.” She held out her hand, its plastic base exposed. “Here’s your last clue.”

Gavin took Mia’s hand, her transfer of information as smooth as the last one. “Thank you,” Gavin murmured once they parted. “Um, good luck with Tina.”

“And you with yours,” Mia replied, mischief in her eyes.

“I— We’re not—” Gavin broke off, then turned and walked out the door, succumbing to the cold wind outside to hide his flushed cheeks. This wasn’t—it wasn’t what Mia had implied. It couldn’t be.

Gavin shook those thoughts from his head and looked at the next clue on his plastic palm. This time, a smiling Nines pointed up to a giant pine tree behind him, the photo on his palm somewhat obscured by his curled fingers. _Come to Campus Martius Park._

With a deep inhale, Gavin jumped into his cab and gave it directions as fast as he could. Fucking Nines. That goddamn asshole. Gavin fidgeted in his seat as the streets passed by, his fingers, both of flesh and plastic, tugging his knitted hat down further on his head. Adrenaline thrummed through Gavin’s veins while excitement kept his heart beating a steady, brisk rhythm. If all Christmases were like this, maybe celebrating them wouldn’t be too bad.

Gavin could see the massive tree even from the far roadside curb. He stepped out into the chill, hopefully for the last time, and began the walk to the tree’s base. Few people came to walk by the tree at noon, so finding Nines staring up at the tree was an easy task. Gavin came up to Nines’ side and, with nothing witty to say, settled on, “How long have you been waiting here?”

“Approximately one hour and twenty-seven minutes,” came Nines’ quiet reply. He turned to Gavin with a warm smile. “Do you like your hat?”

“Um, yeah, it’s, uh, adorable.” Gavin tugged the hat down, trying to use the fabric to hide his burning cheeks. “Thank you.”

Nines reached out and took Gavin’s left hand, intertwining their fingers. “You’re welcome, Gavin. It looks cute on you.” He breathed out a laugh. “How do you feel? Did you have fun?”

Gavin shrugged. “I-I mean, I….” He shifted his weight from one foot to the other and stared at the snow-speckled concrete path. “It was…new. But, um, yeah. It was fun.”

“I’m glad.” Nines squeezed Gavin’s hand, then pulled away and stepped in front of Gavin. “You have one last clue to take.”

Gavin furrowed his brow and glanced between Nines and the giant tree behind him. “But I—I found you. Wasn’t that, like, the whole point of this?”

“Was it?” Nines tipped his head to the side, his hands running down Gavin’s arms to take his hands. Nines smiled down at Gavin’s prosthetic, but kept the skin over his hand intact, for now. “It helps with interfacing,” Nines murmured, running his thumb across the prosthetic’s knuckles. “You’ve noticed? Information can be decoded faster within your prosthetic, while when you just had your plate, you had to decode information yourself.” Nines lifted Gavin’s prosthetic to his lips, his gaze on Gavin as he kissed the back of the prosthetic’s hand. “Efficient, but less…amusing.”

_01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101011 01101001 01110011 01110011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101111 01110101 01100011 01101000 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01101100 01111001 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101_

A shock ran up Gavin’s spine and he gasped, eyes wide, his hands shaking as he held onto Nines. “W-what are you…?”

Nines gave Gavin a small, sly smile. “Let’s get back to work, Sparky.”

“ _Spa—?_ ” Heat flared throughout Gavin’s body, his jaw hanging open while Nines laughed and pulled Gavin along to the road. Once they got into the waiting cab, away from the public eye, Gavin tugged Nines close, their breath hot on each others’ lips. “You’re a fuckin’ prick.”

Nines chuckled and lifted his hand to cup Gavin’s cheek. “I want to kiss you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shoutout to connorssock on tumblr for saying Nines would call Gavin his 'Little Spark' or 'Sparky' because I'm weAK, thanks


	15. Reward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now, this was a dilemma. Gavin grit his teeth and shot Peter a glare. “I don’t trust you.”
> 
> Peter drew his hand back to sign, “Do you have any other choice?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, happy new year everyone lol! I wanted to get this out before the new year but, well, here we are. Good news: there's more porn! That's your gift for the new year, you're welcome

Nines wanted more than a kiss. But, then again, so did Gavin.

Nines licked a wet stripe over his palm, and Gavin let out a gasp when Nines’ fingers slipped beneath his waistband. “Nines,” he breathed, his hand clutching Nines’ arm. “What the fuck, why can we never do this at my apartment?”

“Shh,” Nines breathed hot against Gavin’s ear, then lowered, his mouth too busy sucking on Gavin’s neck to form words. His slick palm rose and fell around Gavin’s cock, a slow, torturous rhythm that drew a whimper from Gavin’s lips.

Gavin’s inhale caught in his throat, his low moan bouncing off the walls of the small cab. “Nines, Nines, y-you— Fuck!” He jerked his head back, resisting the need to buck his hips, his teeth grinding together to hold back another moan. Any coherent sentence shattered before it could slip from Gavin’s lips, Nines’ hand hot and tight around his cock. Gavin turned and curled against Nines’ chest, his fingers grasping onto the front of Nines’ shirt. Through the rapid gasps that left his lungs, Gavin wailed, “You, you, what about you?”

“Me?” Nines hummed his interest as his wrist snapped down, Gavin biting hard on his lip to stifle his cry. “Is that what you want?”

With a frustrated snarl, Gavin lifted his gaze, the dark haze of lust clouding his eyes. “I would enjoy nothing more—” He wet his lips and squeezed his eyes shut to catch his breath. “—than to repay you.”

“What I'm doing is not about payment or reward.” Nines kissed Gavin’s temple with a soft laugh, his finger rubbing along the slit of Gavin’s cock. “I’m doing this because I want to. I’m doing this because I enjoy seeing you writhe and moan beneath me, calling my name in your broken voice.” He caught Gavin’s whimpering mouth in a deep kiss, that mouth begging for more between the few moments they parted.

As Nines helped Gavin slide out of his pants, Gavin pulled back and choked on air, his cheek pressed against the cold glass of the window. It soothed the wildfire in his body, the difference between hot and cold causing a shiver to wrack down his spine. Nines exhaled a puff of warm air over Gavin’s exposed collarbone, his hand working open the zipper of Gavin’s jacket to kiss lower and lower, make dark marks lower and lower. Words caught in Gavin’s throat, a broken, “Nines,” and a plea of, “Hurry.”

Nines tugged down on the collar of Gavin’s t-shirt and sucked hard on a spot above Gavin’s heart. Through a hiss, Gavin wrapped his arms around Nines’ head, his fingers gripped tight around strands of Nines’ hair. “Ow, _fuck,_ how big you want this one to be?”

A rumble was Nines’ response, his teeth tugging on Gavin’s bruising flesh. Gavin yelped, but the pain flooded into pleasure when Nines’ right hand sped up, his palm dripping with his strange saliva and Gavin’s precum. More or less satisfied with his work, Nines pulled away, his left hand brushing over the hickey before lowering to entwine his fingers with Gavin’s prosthetic. “Is it good?” Nines leaned forward and kissed Gavin’s forehead, holding his prosthetic back against the seat. “Gavin,” Nines murmured, trailing down to kiss Gavin’s jaw. “Are you okay?”

“I am _so_ fuckin’ okay,” Gavin gasped as he bucked his hips up into Nines’ hand. “C’mon Nines, _please,_ I—” His words broke away into low, rolling groans. They sounded strange in his ears, almost like they couldn’t belong to _him,_ of all people. He didn’t deserve this pleasure, especially if he did nothing in return. Yet, even then, Gavin’s thoughts became a muddled mass of heat, everything heat. Nines squeezed Gavin’s hand—his prosthetic—and in his peripheral Gavin saw a soft blue glow from Nines’ hand, his unfocused eyes unable to take in anything other than Nines’ face.

The rush of utter, _raw_ feeling ripped a cry from Gavin’s throat, one that Nines silenced with a wet kiss. _[I w] 01100001 [nt y] 01101111 [u mo] 01110010 [e th] 01100001 [n yo] 01110101 [re] 01100001 [lize]_

 _[I don’t, I don’t understand.]_ Gavin wanted to scream, desperate sobs escaping him between the pull of Nines’ teeth on his lips and the feeling of Nines’ tongue in his mouth. Their—their connection, whatever the fuck it was, their interface— It left nothing to question: desire, want, need— All of it crashed against Gavin’s being, sent waves of pleasure down his spine. All of it was from Nines. “Ni-ines,” he choked out, his left hand shaky as it clutched the front of Nines’ shirt, a desperate plea in his eyes, “ _ple-ease._ ”

“Oh, Gavin….” Nines squeezed Gavin’s prosthetic, his plastic thumb running over the side of it. “I’d wanted to prevent making a mess here, but, well…. Just look at you.” He rested his forehead against Gavin’s, his breathing slow, steady. Gavin’s complete opposite. “You’re gorgeous, Gavin.”

“Shut up, sh-shut up—” Gavin trembled, lips tingling from Nines’ kisses. “Nines, _Nines,_ please—“

Nines exhaled, patient, holding the most self-control Gavin had ever seen on someone. With a gentle, chaste kiss, Nines watched Gavin squirm and moan beneath him and whispered, “You’re the most amazing human I’ve ever met.”

“Mmn! Fuck you, I’m not—”

“Aren’t you?” Nines kissed Gavin’s cheek and turned to murmur in his ear, “You’re brave to the point of reckless. You’re thoughtful, in your own way.” He tugged on Gavin’s cock and Gavin bit back a gasp, his hand clawing at Nines’ chest, his prosthetic squeezing Nines’ hand tight. Nines chuckled, husky in Gavin’s ear. “And you’re all mine.”

A moan spilled from Gavin’s lips before he could stop himself. “Clo—close, I’m—”

“I’m yours,” Nines finished. He buried his face against Gavin’s neck, then bit hard on the skin where Gavin’s shoulder met his throat. _[You’re everything to me, Gavin.]_

Gavin tipped his head back with a pained gasp. “Y-you can’t just fuckin’ say that shit, assho—” He broke off in a silent cry, curling against Nines’ chest, every single one of his muscles growing taut before warm, gentle bliss settled into every cell of Gavin's body. He slumped against Nines, the fingertips of his prosthetic twitching, almost sparking, from aftershocks.

“Tired, Sparky?” Nines kissed the top of Gavin’s head and drew his sticky right palm away, then started to do the same with his left.

“Wait,” Gavin rasped. His prosthetic clung to Nines’ hand, Nines’ skin now reformed, Gavin’s clouded gaze struggling to focus on Nines’ face. “K…keep this one?”

Nines nodded, his smile bright, even though Gavin couldn’t see the finer details. “Anything for you.” He kept his left hand intertwined with Gavin’s prosthetic and did what he could to clean up with his right. Gavin didn’t have the energy to yell at Nines for licking the cum off his hand, only somewhat grossed out when Nines then used that hand to help him back into his pants.

Sometime along the way, the cab had stopped in the back parking lot of the DPD. After one final check to be sure Nines had cleaned everything up as much as he could, the two exited the cab, its windows a dark black. Oh. Gavin glanced at Nines, his brow furrowed, a silent question.

“I hacked into the cab’s program and altered its windows’ opacity.” Nines smiled and pressed a soft kiss to Gavin’s head. “No need to worry, Gavin.”

“Good, um, good.” Gavin shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “So you just…hacked into it.”

Nines nodded. “Yes.”

Gavin let out a huff, unable to feel too much annoyance, all things considered. “Jeez. You’re— You can’t do that shit.”

“Would you have preferred the alternative?”

At that, Gavin frowned and pulled his hat down. “I-I mean, no. Just…don’t _do_ that. Unless you, uh, have to, I guess.”

Nines let out a soft chuckle. “I know, Gavin. I’m joking with you.” He squeezed Gavin’s prosthetic, then led him into the DPD through the back door.

The lingering tingles in Gavin’s system faded as they walked toward the bustle of the bullpen, and Gavin pulled his hand away from Nines. “I gotta, uh, go talk to Dean.”

Nines cocked his head. “Alone?”

“Uh, yeah; I’ll be fine. He’s the one guy in there who wasn’t a complete asshat, so I’ll be fine.” Even so, Gavin shrugged and continued with, “Send in someone free if you have to. Connor, Chris, Hank. I don’t really care.” Gavin started to step back toward the holding cells, but tipped over, righting himself with a jerk before he could fall to the ground. “Uh. Shut the fuck up, you didn’t see that.”

Nines raised his palm to cover his affectionate grin. “Yes, Detective. Remember, get used to your prosthetic’s added weight.”

Gavin scowled as he jabbed a finger in Nines’ direction. “You’re an asshole. Catch up on our paperwork.”

With a smile, Nines nodded. “Understood, Detective. Call if you need me.” He raised his hand to tap near his LED, then headed to the bullpen.

Alright. Now Gavin just had to deal with Dean. After a deep breath, Gavin went to set up the interrogation room. He notified one of the guards to bring Dean to the room, then waited for them to arrive.

Dean settled in the metal chair across from Gavin, his hands resting on his lap, tied together by cuffs. “Cain?”

“You don’t have to call me that anymore,” Gavin said, regret seeping through his skin. “I…I’m sorry.”

Dean shook his head and twirled his thumbs. “Thank you.” He let out a huff alongside a melancholic smile. “I know the law, and I don’t expect you to be able to forgive me for what I’ve done. But that’s not why I wanted to talk to you.” He drew in a deep breath and closed his eyes, the eyes that so effortlessly seemed to bore into Gavin’s soul through the film that otherwise kept Dean from seeing. “I don’t expect you to believe me, either, but…. Zeus has a second location where he organizes his protests. The two areas communicate through the androids planted there.”

“Using androids even though they hate them?” Though, Gavin supposed that was a dumb question, given the reason for the whole android revolution in the first place.

_You’re precious to me, Gavin._

Gavin slammed his fist on the table, both him and Dean flinching at the harsh sound. Gavin coughed, heated embarrassment creeping up his throat while a warm shudder ran down his spine. Why did he have to think about that now? “S-sorry, I, uh— It’s nothing, not because of you. Um.” He changed the subject. “Why are you telling me this?”

Dean frowned, some of the blood returning to his pale face. Gavin tried not to let the guilt seep through his gut. “Well, I…I know what we were doing was wrong. I don’t…I don’t hate androids. I’m kinda on the fence on this whole revolution thing, but, well…they never did anything bad to me.” He shrugged and blew out a sigh. “I can’t imagine what they looked like when I drained them of their blue blood. I know I can’t take away the trauma of you having to see that, but still, that’s…. I just don’t share Zeus’ beliefs.”

“I…. Thank you.” Gavin searched for words, anything to express the complete, utter gratitude blooming in his chest. “Dean, you’re really…you’re a really good man.”

Dean shook his head. “No, I don’t deserve those words from you, Gavin.” With a sigh, he leaned back in his chair. “The second location…. It’s at the dump west of the city. I’m not sure of its exact location, but it’s somewhere around there. You’d have to ask Zeus and his bodyguard for more detailed info, but I guess it’s easier to get it from me.” Dean laughed, dry and weak. “I’m not sure what else to say. I don’t know much from only hearing Zeus talk about the other camp.”

“No, no, this is amazing!” Gavin lifted his hands toward Dean, a broad grin on his face. “Thank you so much, Dean. Really.”

“Oh, stop it. I just confirmed a location.” Still, Dean mirrored Gavin’s smile, though he had no means of seeing it upon Gavin’s face. “Thank you, Gavin. For listening to me.”

Gavin tipped his chin down, a shy sort of pride creeping over his face. “God, I’m…so sorry.” He gathered up the hem of his shirt in his hand, then released it and played with the fingers of his prosthetic. “Thank _you._ Alright? That’s final.” He stood from his chair and helped Dean up. “Are you, uh, doing okay in the holding cells?”

Dean nodded. “Don’t worry about me. I’m not _that_ fragile.” He laughed, more carefree. “I’ll be fine.”

“Yeah.” Gavin led Dean out the door and let a guard take him back to his cell while Gavin followed behind. Most of the cells had been emptied of some of Zeus’ followers, but a few still lingered, the few who knew more than they’d care to admit.

Gavin stepped up to the thick glass and raised his prosthetic. _“Peter,”_ he fingerspelled, his gaze trained on Peter’s dark scowl. He beckoned Peter forward, a smug grin on his face as the guard brought him out of the cell and led him to the interrogation room.

They settled in their chairs. “Thanks, Mike,” Gavin called to the guard, then turned to Peter and leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed. “Got anything to tell me, tin can?”

 _“Nice hat,”_ Peter signed as well as he could with his hands in cuffs, his face blank, deadpan.

Gavin held back a squeak and gripped the sides of his hat, tugging them down. “Don’t use that tone of sign with me, fucker! This hat is…is….”

_It looks cute on you._

Gavin growled and turned his burning face away from Peter. Why now, why _now?_ “It’s none of your fuckin’ business! Talk to me about your fuckin’ system, your other camp.”

Without making a move to sign, Peter reached out his hand over the table. Gavin furrowed his brow, but before he could make a sound, the skin over Peter’s hand peeled back to show his chassis.

Now, this was a dilemma. Gavin grit his teeth and shot Peter a glare. “I don’t trust you.”

Peter drew his hand back to sign,  _“Do you have any other choice?”_

...Fuck. Gavin’s bullet wounds stung from the memories of lead tearing through his flesh, and he resisted the urge to scratch at the incessant itch beneath his bandages. “Um, I do actually, fuck you.”

 _“You don’t.”_ Peter rolled his eyes. _“You are an idiot if you think so.”_

Through grit teeth, Gavin drew in a hiss of an inhale. “You can show me the location on a map, can’t you?”

Peter trailed his gaze to Gavin’s prosthetic and tapped his plastic fingers against the metal table.

Gavin flinched as static shot through his prosthetic’s fingertips, and he jerked his prosthetic off the table. “ _F_ _uck_ you.”

 _“You talk as though I’m willing to tell you these things.”_ Peter didn’t break his gaze away from Gavin’s, the resolve in his dark brown gaze as hard as stone. _“I don’t want to show you my information on a map. I want to—"_ Gavin was pretty sure that was the sign for ‘interface’.

“I’m _not_ fucking doing that,” Gavin snapped.

With a shrug, Peter signed, _“Then you’re not getting my information.”_

Gavin set his jaw, his fingers wrapped tight around the wrist of his prosthetic. “Why are you doing this, huh? Do you get off on torturing me?”

_“You really want me to answer that?”_

“Oh, fuck you!” Gavin jumped up from his chair and wrapped his arms around himself, taking slow steps around the table. Peter was deviant, he was supposed to be on their side—why still help Zeus?

Peter held out his hands on the table, the right’s plastic base exposed, the left holding a hologram map of Detroit in his palm. He tracked Gavin’s movements, his eyes blank, patient, willing to wait forever until Gavin made a choice.

A moment passed before Gavin reached out and—

 _“Gavin,”_ came Hank’s voice over the speakers, almost frantic. _“Do_ not _do that. You’re done, get the hell out.”_

“But—“

_“It’s a location, we’ll search for it until we find it. Get the fuck out of the room.”_

Peter held up his hologram, hand at an angle so it wasn’t facing the one-way glass. Words ran across his palm. _“They’ll move before you ever find them. I can tell them they’re in danger at any moment, and they’ll move. You have your choices, now make them.”_

Gavin wanted to ask why, ask how scared and helpless he must feel to keep helping those who’d just throw him away when they had no use for him anymore. Instead, Gavin reached out and closed the gap between their plastic fingers.

What Gavin saw wasn’t a map. Wasn’t a location, wasn’t code, wasn’t binary. It was a video, dated December 22, from Peter’s point of view.

A video of Nines, broken and bleeding blue, bright blue, as Peter brought down the blunt edge of a shovel over Nines’ glitching pseudo-skin and ripped a scar gushing blood from Nines’ neck all the way down his torso.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man December 22 was really just a shit day for Gavin lmao, I almost feel bad


	16. Bittersweet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nines didn’t mention anything, but Gavin knew he noticed. He always noticed, every emotion, every plea or want on Gavin’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to edit all this on my phone so if it’s initially formatted weird then that’s the reason lmfao

Gavin couldn’t remember how he’d ended up slumped on the floor of the interrogation room, his mind spinning with data and glitched-out feedback, looping again and again—the descent of a shovel, the gush of thirium. Someone was talking to him, but Gavin couldn’t hear them, his ears filled with the crunch of metal bending plastic.

A single touch cleared the code from his head. “Are you okay?” Nines gasped out, eyes wide with frantic concern. “Gavin, talk to me, please.”

“Good,” Gavin breathed, weak, unsure himself if it was a lie or not. “I’m fine.”

Nines nodded, worry keeping down the crease of his brow. “You’re safe.” He ran his thumb over the knuckles of Gavin’s prosthetic. “Okay? You’re fine.”

Gavin found his gaze drifted down Nines’ jawline, down to his throat, where the barest traces of his scar peeked out from beneath his turtleneck. “Nines, I—I saw—”

“I know.” Nines squeezed Gavin’s prosthetic. “Calm down for a moment. I’m right here, I’m okay.”

“You’re okay,” Gavin echoed. He tipped his head back against the wall, drawing in a deep breath that tightened his throat, each new inhale doing the same, until—

“Gavin.” Nines reached out and cupped Gavin’s cheek, his gunmetal eyes filled to the brim with concern. “Look at me. I am right here. Okay?”

“Mmn-hmm.” Gavin drew in another gulp of air, and this time his throat relaxed, the tightness in his chest releasing its cold grip on his insides. “Your—your hands, they’re sticky?”

Nines nodded, expression twisted into something akin to remorse. “I…may have gone too far. But it’s okay now.”

“Yeah. Yeah, okay.” Though the reek of thirium assaulted his nose, Gavin leaned against the wall, using both that and Nines to help himself to his feet. As Gavin’s vision swam with black specks, he stumbled against Nines’ chest with a pained groan. Then his vision cleared.

Hank and Connor watched him, the two unmoving from the opposite side of the room. Connor, lips in a tight line, would glance at the thirium pump regulator in his stiff hands between the moments he looked from Nines to Gavin. Peter was crumpled onto the table, his spine contorted too far to one side compared to the rest of his body, a hole in his chest dripping a steady stream of thirium into a puddle. Connor’s LED spun a frantic yellow. Peter’s LED was dim.

“What…what the fuck…?” Gavin lifted his hand to his head, distress throbbing hard against his skull. “What the fuck happened?”

Hank stepped forward, hands up as if to try and soothe a cornered animal. “That android—”

“His name’s _Peter,_ ” Gavin snapped, hands shaking as they clutched onto Nines’ jacket, the white splattered with blue.

“Peter.” Hank gulped. “Peter, he connected with you or something. You…you were in so much pain.” He motioned to Nines, his movements slow. “I started to do something, but Nines rushed in, and, well….” Hank shrugged and took another step forward. “Even when you and Peter weren’t touching, you were still freaking out. Nines solved the problem the only way he could think of.”

From the corner of his eye, Gavin saw Nines and Connor share a glance. Thick and heavy, the tension that blanketed the room condensed right on Gavin’s chest. “Lemme out,” he gasped, hand clawing at his shirt’s collar. “Fuck, I….”

Nines released him, the weight in the air lifting, if only somewhat. “Lieutenant Anderson, please take Gavin to some fresh air.” He closed his eyes and exhaled a breath, Gavin only able to imagine how hot the puff of air would be. “I think I need a moment as well.”

“Nines—” Connor began, but broke off. He placed Peter’s thirium pump regulator on the corner of the table, then met Nines’ eyes with a harsh glare. Gavin couldn’t see Connor’s, but Nines’ LED dipped into red from the yellow it had cycled in, the two androids’ eyelids fluttering from their connection.

A frown tugged down the edges of Connor’s lips while Nines’ LED returned to yellow, not much else changing in his expression. “We’ll remain here, Lieutenant,” Connor said. “Nines needs my company to clean up the mess he’s made.”

_I’d wanted to prevent making a mess here, but, well…. Just look at you._

Gavin flinched, fire licking up his throat. He gulped and didn’t say a word as he led the way out of the interrogation room, Hank a step behind. He didn’t stop until a gust of wind assaulted him as he stepped through the DPD’s front doors.

Hank placed his hand on Gavin’s shoulder and led him to one of the street benches by the skeleton of a rusted newsstand. Hank sat on the bench and motioned for Gavin to do the same. “C’mon, Reed, sitting down isn’t gonna kill you.”

“Fuck off.” But Gavin sat anyway, sliding down in the seat until the back of the bench pressed against his skull. With a deep, heavy sigh, Gavin crossed his arms and closed his eyes.

Blue blood. The terror on Nines’ face as the shovel ripped through his chassis, the shovel that looked like it was in Gavin’s hands. Blue blood blue blood blue blood—

“How’s Jo doing?”

Gavin wheezed and flicked his eyes open, giving Hank an incredulous look. Even so, the barest traces of relief soothed the tense knot in his shoulders. “Good, I guess. She still keeps coming back.” He sighed and looked up at the sky, the sun glinting off the windows of the surrounding buildings. “How’s Connor?”

“Don’t start that with me after how you came into work with Nines, Reed.” Hank scoffed and rested his arms on the back of the bench as he smirked down at Gavin, who hid his heated cheeks by tugging down the black knit cloth on his head.

“Uhh, you’re out of your fuckin’ mind, old man.”

Hank laughed, something melancholic in the way the sound hit Gavin’s ears. Connor had been good for him. “My partner can scan _your_ partner’s hand—”

“Okay, this conversation? Over.” Gavin hefted himself into a proper sitting position and shot Hank a glare. “I know you know about what happened. I know Connor was the one who….” The word caught in Gavin’s throat, the finality of it something Gavin didn’t want to commit to. He forced it out all the same. “Saved me. So I know he’d have to have told you something about all this stuff.”

At that, Hank cast Gavin a sly glance. “Bold of you to assume I wasn’t there myself.”

“Oh, shut the fuck up, millennial.” But Gavin set his jaw, a tightness to his throat he’d become all too familiar with, his eyes burning as they held back the wetness threatening to spill from them. “I…. Thanks. Asshole.”

Hank frowned and leaned forward, clasping his hands together. “Didn’t burst a blood vessel, did you?”

Not a blood vessel, but Gavin did burst into tears. He sobbed into his hands, his salty tears mixing with the sticky residue of the thirium that had been on Nines’ own palms. Hank, taken aback, sat silent amongst his guilt. Gavin didn’t care. His shoulders shook with the weight of all the bullshit, the total, utter _bullshit_ of everything that had happened to him. The fucking undercover mission that had gotten far too close to failing, the looks on the trashed androids that screamed, cried at him when he’d helped Dean extract their blue blood, the emptiness of his own apartment in the aftermath of him waking from his coma, the light Nines brought to that dark emptiness, the light that Gavin didn’t deserve, didn’t understand—

Gavin let his jacket swallow him up, let himself hide within what little cover he had. His body ached from its wounds, ached on the outside and from within. His breath caught in his throat as he tried to silence himself, unsure how loud he really was, but he found that, for once, he didn’t quite care.

He deserved this. He deserved to cry. No matter what anyone else said—that he deserved a break, a rest, some help—he didn’t deserve that. What a burden he’d become, the detective that couldn’t get off his own fucking desk to do his job, couldn’t even pick up a handgun to defend himself with. Sure, he could walk now, but he hadn’t gotten back his old strength. Not yet.

And then, like the receding tide, Gavin’s tears came to a stop. He sniffed and wiped the tear tracks from his cheeks with his sleeve, the faux leather not the best at cleaning up his utter mess of a face.

Hank held out a crumpled napkin. “Here,” he murmured, as if he’d break some fragile bubble around them if he spoke any louder.

Gavin took the napkin and did his best to clean up his disgusting face. He wadded up the damp cloth and tossed it toward a nearby trash can, but missed. More tears threatened to drip down Gavin’s cheeks.

“Hey, hey.” Hank held out his hand, then got up and helped the dirty napkin finish its journey to the trash. “There. You won’t get fined for littering.”

“Oh my god, you are such a goddamn assbag,” Gavin hissed out, covering his face with his arm.

Hank settled back onto the bench and exhaled slow. “Yeah, I’m the assbag.” He let them sit in silence for a moment. “You wanna head back inside?”

Without moving his arm from his face, Gavin nodded. He took one last deep breath and wiped his face with his sleeve one final time before standing and letting Hank lead him back into the bullpen. Eerie silence rang in Gavin’s ears as he and Hank made their way back to the interrogation room.

Connor, alone, came up to them in the hallway. “Lieutenant, Detec—” Connor stalled for a moment, blue LED shifting into a flash of yellow. “—tive. Everything alright?”

“Yeah, Con, we’re good now. More or less.” Hank glanced back at Gavin but didn’t mention anything else. “How’s the and—Peter?”

Connor settled into a professional recitation of the incident with ease. “His spinal cord is severely damaged, but it’s nothing we have to worry about. The androids here are capable of repairing the damage, so once his spine is realigned, we’ll be able to reinsert his thirium pump regulator and reactivate him.”

Hank nodded along and patted Connor’s shoulder. “That’s good, at least, that it’s not too serious.” He glanced around, scanning the area in his own way. “Where’s Nines?”

“He said he wanted some time to himself.” Connor frowned. “I think….” He turned to Gavin. “I think you and Nines should go home early today. I’ll talk with Captain Fowler to get the clearance— Nines is in the bathroom, so leave Peter and the others to us, okay, Detective Reed?”

Gavin frowned, but nodded anyhow. “Yeah…. Yeah, alright. That sounds good.” He hated the weakness in his voice, wetness still lingering in his throat. “I’ll go, uh, find Nines.”

Without much else from Connor or Hank, Gavin turned and headed for the bathroom. The hiss of one of the sinks met his ears as he pushed through the door, and Nines stood next to the running sink, holding his jacket under the water.

Nines flicked his gaze up to see Gavin’s reflection, but otherwise didn’t lift his head. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Gavin stepped up to Nines’ side. A moment passed as Gavin watched Nines clean the thirium from his jacket, long since faded away from his vision. “I think…I would’ve done the same.” Once the words left his mouth, heat crept up Gavin’s neck and down his arm.

“What?” Nines turned to him, his eyes wide, his LED flickering a steady yellow in the mirror’s reflection.

Gavin’s fingertips, both flesh and plastic, twitched as he thought of Peter’s video, Nines’ face contorted in shock and terror as thirium spilled from his body. He gulped. “I dunno what I looked like, but…I think if I saw you scared and…horrified, I would’ve given that jackass what he deserved, too.”

Silence met Gavin’s confession. Then, Nines drew Gavin into a tight hug, his hands trembling where they pressed against Gavin’s back. In a quiet, vulnerable voice, Nines said, “I…I hope we never see each other like that again.”

“Me too.” Gavin wet his lips and raised his arms to wrap around Nines’ shoulders, then exhaled a shaky breath as he tipped his head up and urged Nines to look at him. “Can, um, c-can I…? Kiss?”

A tiny, bubbly laugh fell from Nines lips. “Yes,” he said, then closed the gap between them in a sweet kiss. He pulled back with a satisfied sigh, the tenseness of his body relaxing in Gavin’s hold. “I….” He shook his head, then gave Gavin an almost…pained smile. “Let’s head home.”

With a nod, Gavin drew away from Nines’ embrace. Nines took his jacket from the sink and held it under the hand dryer for a few seconds before folding it over his arm and following Gavin out of the bathroom.

They said their goodbyes to Hank and Connor as they passed the break room, the two wishing Nines and Gavin a merry Christmas. “Shut up,” Gavin said. Though, he did mutter a, “Happy holidays,” as he brushed past them and headed out the front doors.

The cab ride was a quiet one. Gavin leaned back in his seat with a sigh, his fingers tapping against his knee. Each minute passed by with a tick in his HUD, each second sending more sweat down his back.

Nines didn’t mention anything, but Gavin knew he noticed. He always noticed, every emotion, every plea or want on Gavin’s face. Nines could read Gavin like a children’s book, all easy words and choppy sentences, desperate to get to an end that didn’t exist. Nines read him all the same, again and again, for no reason other than…entertainment? Boredom?

Gavin frowned. While he was a children’s book, Nines almost seemed like…one of Tina’s old, marked-up psychology textbooks. Interesting, enthralling, but hard to interpret all the same. Imperfect because of the will of its…owner.

Gavin lifted his hand to his head, his muscles going taut, taut—blue blood, metal, plastic, horror, shock, blue, blue, so much blue—

He forced himself away from the memory. “Did it hurt?”

“What?” Nines asked, voice quiet, almost weak. Gavin was a children’s book.

“When Peter nearly killed you.”

A few moments passed as Nines took Gavin’s prosthetic in both his hands. “Yes,” he breathed. “It hurt to think that, if I fell there, I’d leave us both to die.”

Gavin wet his lips. “Oh. Yeah, right. Um.” He leaned toward Nines and squeezed one of his hands with the prosthetic. “Nines?” he murmured, fear laced in the word.

“Yes, Gavin?” Nines voice sounded the same.

“I don’t…own you.”

Nines shook his head. “You don’t.”

“I…I _don’t._ Okay?” Gavin gave another squeeze to Nines’ hand. “You could…you could leave me, disappear from the DPD, never even live in Detroit for the rest of your immortal life, and I couldn’t….” _[stop you.]_

“Hypothetically, yes.” Nines shifted closer, resting his lips against Gavin’s temple. His LED spun yellow in Gavin’s peripheral. “But, realistically, I couldn’t imagine a more fulfilling life than one with you, Gavin. And…of course, Connor, Lieutenant Anderson, Officer Chen. You and all the others have opened my world more than you realize.”

Gavin nodded, slow, his throat choked up. “How? How did I— How did _we_ do that for you?”

Nines just shook his head with a soft laugh. “That’s too long of a story to tell right now.” He tipped his head toward his door, the cab sitting in front of Gavin’s apartment complex. “Let’s head inside.”

“Yeah. Right.” Gavin opened his door and stepped out, then rounded the cab to head into the apartment building, Nines following close behind. They took the stairs to the second floor and stood in front of Gavin’s door as Gavin fumbled for his key.

God, his hands were sweaty.

“Um, here, you do it,” Gavin said, tripping over his words as he held out his closed fist to Nines, his hand trembling.

Nines furrowed his brow but took the key anyway. Instead of the usual scratched and scuffed key of Gavin’s apartment, Nines opened his palm to a shiny silver key with a Siamese cat keychain connected to it.

At Nines’ broad, adorable smile, Gavin realized the worry churning in his gut had swelled into something warm, something terrifying.

If Gavin didn’t know any better, he’d call it bittersweet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof am I right fellas


	17. Take Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did you choose your every action and response just so I could whisper in your ear with my hand on your cock?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh I have no excuse my bad basically this whole thing is porn

“Stop looking at the damn thing,” Gavin muttered, unable to tear his gaze from Nines.

Nines only laughed and drew Gavin closer to his side from where they sat on the couch, his thumb running over the flat of his new key, over the bumps of the cat keychain. “No.” But he did tilt his head and glance to Gavin, their faces far too close. “Or, are you saying you’d rather have my attention on you?”

Gavin’s breath caught in his throat. “W-what? Fuck no!” But he didn’t pull away, didn’t give Nines a reason to turn his attention to something else.

Nines pressed gentle kisses to Gavin’s temple, down his cheek. “I love it, you know.” He chuckled and squeezed Gavin’s shoulder, letting out a content sigh. “I didn’t realize me not having access to your home meant so much to you.”

“I-I mean, we come home at about the same time anyway, it’s no big deal. Just for emergencies.” Gavin didn’t need Nines to identify that lie, didn’t need to be out of denial to spot his bullshit. “You have nowhere else to go.”

Nines shrugged, his breath warm on Gavin’s cheek. “I have plenty of places I could go, but nowhere else I’d like to be.”

A thrum of warmth shot down Gavin’s chest and he nodded, burying his face against Nines’ collarbone. Nothing he could say could express his embarrassment, his gratitude, his relief. When Nines squeezed his prosthetic, Nines’ fingers a smooth silver, Gavin realized he didn’t have to say a word.

To anyone else, Gavin’s apartment was silent save for the background noise of the TV and the impatient mewls of Jo as she bumped her head against Gavin’s legs. But, to Gavin and Nines, they couldn’t hear those other things at all.

Gavin could say he knew the basics of what an interface was. After all, he’d done that before, and not just with Nines. But…this. Gavin knew this was different. This was phantom feeling, phantom touch, a thought as conversation, a rush of feeling met with understanding deeper than words could convey. Gavin wasn’t sure how much he showed to Nines, how much Nines showed to him, but when they broke the connection, Gavin felt as though a part of himself had broken off with him and a piece of Nines had come to replace it.

“I’ve wanted to do this for a long time,” Nines whispered, his voice soft amongst the background noise. “I’ve wanted to show you the world you’ve opened yourself up to ever since I first connected with you.”

“I don’t wanna….” Gavin trailed off with a frown and curled up further against Nines’ side.

Nines nodded and kissed the top of Gavin’s head. “Rely too much on your prosthetic,” he finished. “Which I don’t quite understand.”

Gavin drew in a slow breath, then focused his feelings out through his prosthetic, to Nines. Still, he was more used to words. “It’s easier to take it away than my arm, I guess. Easier to break it, tear it off….” He sighed. “You know I’m only using it right now because of…you. Other than that, I should at least learn to be ambidextrous.”

“You know what ambidextrous means?” Nines burst out a laugh when Gavin rammed his fist against Nines’ gut. “Alright, alright, I’m joking. I understand, more or less.” He rested his head back against the couch and let his fingertips wander through Gavin’s hair. “You’re thinking practice range? Perhaps we could visit there once we get off our break.”

With a nod, Gavin said, “Sounds good,” against Nines’ chest. “I haven’t written much, either. D’ya think that’d help?”

“Anything would.” Nines tapped the prosthetic’s fingertips and sent a trickle of pride through the connection. “Now shh, this episode’s almost over.”

With a nod, Gavin went quiet, his gaze going to the screen of his TV, though he focused on hearing Nines’ steady heartbeat from where his ear pressed against Nines’ chest. Gavin ran his prosthetic’s thumb over the back Nines’ hand, the slow thump of Nines’ thirium pump almost like the low lull of a lullaby. His eyes slid shut, heavy, and Gavin didn’t fight it.

Gavin’s eyes flew open and he jerked with a start, his breath catching in his throat. His HUD glowed a gentle blue: _18:00:43._ A four-hour nap that felt like a second. Gavin groaned and rubbed his drowsy face, then sat up in his…bed? “Nines?”

 _[Welcome back,]_ came Nines’ message. _[Did you sleep well?]_

Gavin flopped back onto his mattress with a groan, humming his affirmation. _[Sorta. Feels like I didn’t sleep at all.]_ He paused. _[Where are you?]_

_[Kitchen. I wasn’t sure if you’d be hungry after you woke, but I started dinner just in case.]_

At that, Gavin curled up on his side and covered his burning cheeks with his hands. Nines was…Nines was so sweet? _[I’m comin’ in a second.]_ He hefted himself up and stretched his arms above his head with a yawn, then slid out of bed and lumbered out of the room.

Nines stood at the stove, frying up some vegetables and chicken. Gavin came up behind him and reached out, hesitating, before he wrapped his arms around Nines’ chest and rested his cheek against Nines’ back. The beat of Nines’ thirium pump stuttered against Gavin’s palms.

“Still sleepy?” Nines asked, voice level.

Gavin nodded against his back, his hands trailing down Nines’ stomach, down, down— Gavin snapped his hands up and gripped the fabric of Nines’ shirt. “Smells good,” he said around the crack in his voice, his face on fire.

With a soft laugh, Nines brought one of his hands to hold the back of Gavin’s, intertwining their fingers and squeezing before bringing his hand back to the pan’s handle. “Is that all you’d like to say to me?”

Gavin shuddered. “I….” The fingers of his prosthetic slipped beneath the hem of Nines’ shirt, the pressure sensors running over the hard bump of Nines’ scar, ending at his right hip. Nines exhaled a slow puff of air, it catching in his throat. A warm shiver rolled down Gavin’s spine.

“I have a question for you, Gavin,” Nines breathed, the slow rise and fall of his chest unable to hide his increasing heart rate. “Would we have ended up here, at this one moment, if you had not gotten into your accident?”

Gavin’s breath hitched, but Nines continued anyway, “I had come to the DPD to be your partner. I had no other purpose.” Nines turned off the burner and moved the pan off the heat, then drew his hands to Gavin’s. “I know you hate your situation. I understand the trauma of what happened to you, how much you’ve had to overcome to get back a semblance of your old self.” He sighed, then, the sound he let out almost pained. “Yet, I….”

“Yeah,” Gavin cut in, hugging Nines close. “We’d still end up here, Nines.”

Gavin felt Nines’ smile more than saw it, Nines’ plastic fingers curled around Gavin’s prosthetic. “What makes you so sure?”

Gavin frowned, his thoughts and emotions spinning in his head, a dizzying array of incomprehensible sensation. “I…dunno. I just…. It’s a gut feeling type of thing.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Nines moved Gavin’s hands up his stomach, letting his shirt ride up his torso. “You’re okay with knowing you went through such hardship and pain to get to a result that would’ve been the same, regardless of what it took to get there?”

“I know you think in preconstructions and reconstructions and shit, but—” Gavin sighed and rested his chin on Nines’ shoulder. “Look, Nines, _getting_ to the ‘result’ doesn’t matter. Just…live in the present for once, and not in possibilities of the past or future.”

Nines’ LED flashed red. “I…think I understand.” They fell into silence, Nines slow in lifting his arm up, letting his hand cup the back of Gavin’s head, keeping Gavin close. “I have one last question for you.”

“Y-yeah?”

“You want to touch me, don’t you?”

Gavin couldn’t lie, not when the cool plastic of Nines’ palm pressed against the nape of his neck, not when Nines gripped Gavin’s prosthetic with almost trembling fingers. Gavin buried his face against Nines’ shoulder blade. “Yes,” he rasped. “Please, Nines.”

At Nines’ shudder, heat dripped down Gavin’s torso and pooled in his gut. Nines pushed Gavin’s prosthetic against the hem of his pants, his breath spilling from his lips with each tremble of his shoulders. “I have a phallus,” he gasped out. “Is that what you were hoping for?”

Gavin curled his hands into fists for a moment and exhaled a soft, exasperated groan. “Never fucking call it that again.” Even so, at least now he knew what the hell he was getting himself into.

“I’ve yet to make use of it, it’s….” Nines gulped and wet his lips for no reason other than to send more fire through Gavin’s system, Nines’ LED cycling yellow. “Just the thought seems to be more enjoyable than I’d anticipated. I merely thought you sensitive.”

“Oh, fuck off.” Gavin brushed away his hesitation and unbuckled Nines’ belt, then dipped his prosthetic below Nines’ pants. “Holy shit,” he hissed, breathing hot and heavy at Nines’ neck. “You…you can feel this?”

Nines nodded with a sharp gasp. “Yes.” He tipped his head back against Gavin’s shoulder, lips parted to breath out quiet moans, Gavin only able to look on at the erotic scene with wide eyes.

Gavin dragged his hand’s nails up Nines’ torso in a burst of impulsiveness, his reward Nines’ gasp that he tried to bite back. Gavin gulped hard and swiped his prosthetic’s thumb over the head of Nines’ cock, each tremble Nines made felt against Gavin’s chest. And with another impulsive thrum, Gavin parted his lips and kissed down Nines’ cheek, nipping at the pseudo-skin of his jawline.

“Gavin,” Nines moaned, his hand at Gavin’s neck clenching around strands of Gavin’s hair and _pulling,_ his other tugging down the collar of his turtleneck to expose the skin of his throat. “You can do better than that, can’t you?”

“I have your dick in my hand, shut the fuck up.” Gavin growled, unable to make the sound as aggressive as he would have liked. He thought of the mark Nines had made on his collarbone, the bite marks and hickeys, and Gavin clawed down Nines’ chest and sank his teeth onto Nines’ neck as he curled his fingers around Nines’ cock and stroked slow, teasing, almost, Nines burning hot in his palm.

It ripped a shameless cry from Nines’ throat, his LED a glaring red. And Gavin thought _he_ was loud. “Gavin, Gavin,” Nines gasped, his voice box stuttering as it filled with static. He rocked his hips forward, the joints of his legs faltering in the movement. “I-I—”

Gavin kissed the mark he’d left, glowing blue and silver where his teeth had broken through pseudo-skin. He pulled his prosthetic out from Nines’ pants, the huff of a whimper Nines let out shaking his entire body. “Shh,” Gavin muttered, lifting his prosthetic to Nines’ lips. “I need you to, um, y’know….”

Nines met Gavin’s gaze with a storm in his eyes: clouded but sparking with energy all the same. Gavin couldn’t look away as Nines parted his lips and lapped at Gavin’s fingers and palm, his saliva thick as it dripped down his chin and neck. For a moment, Gavin was sure his heart stopped in his chest.

Gavin pulled his prosthetic away, shoving it back into Nines’ pants and taking its place around Nines’ cock. His palm slid over the length of Nines’ dick, wet and surely dripping with whatever android precum was. As Nines let out another moan, Gavin caught Nines’ lips in his, the sound ending muffled and broken, Gavin unable to hold back a ragged groan as Nines tugged hard on his hair.

They parted with a rough gasp, Gavin unsure who it belonged to, sure it was a mixture of them both. He gasped for air, resting his forehead on Nines’ shoulder, thoughts running wild as Nines bucked his hips against his hand. “You’re a mess,” Gavin breathed with a chuckle, his shoulders trembling at Nines’ sounds, Nines’ heat. More words spilled from his lips before he could stop them. “Did your program predict this would happen?” He flicked his wrist up, then snapped down, again and again, shivering at Nines’ breathless gasp. “Did you choose your every action and response just so I could whisper in your ear with my hand on your cock?”

A desperate moan, almost a sob, ripped out of Nines’ throat. “Gav, Gavin,” he said, words breaking and spiraling off into static, his cheeks a flaming cerulean, LED blinking a frantic red. “ _Please,_ more, Gavin your _voice,_  your voice is—“

“My voice?” Gavin teased a chuckle near Nines’ ear, Nines’ shiver strong against his chest. “I knew you liked me saying your name, Nines, but it’s my whole voice, huh?” Watching Nines unravel in his hold, becoming a wreck of composure, a writhing mass of heat and pleasure— Now Gavin knew why Nines had wanted so badly to do this, to take Gavin’s cock into his mouth, to watch Gavin cry and beg and _beg_ and beg—

Gavin couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this satisfied, this confident in himself. He trailed his fingers up Nines’ chest, hiking up his shirt further, and caught one of Nines’ nipples between his thumb and forefinger, tugging on the flesh, his reward a low moan from Nines. “I can feel how close you are,” Gavin said, quieter than a whisper, his hands trembling with each movement, his prosthetic twitching from each shock Nines sent to it. Gavin didn’t know where his words came from, didn’t know most of what he was saying, but Nines’ moans urged him on. “Did you ever think about what it would feel like, Nines? Not just my hand on your cock, but….” Gavin drew in a deep breath, it hitching in his throat at just the thought. “You’re so big,” he ended up saying, words slurred in awe, in desire. “I…. God, Nines,” he breathed, nipping at Nines’ ear, his exhale shaky and hot. “I bet you’d _love_ fucking me, wouldn’t you?”

Nines nodded with an agonized sob. He grit his teeth and set his jaw, arching his back with a sharp, wet hiss before slumping against Gavin, his legs trembling to keep himself standing.

Damn, Gavin loved it all.

Gavin took a deep breath to even out the rapid rise and fall of his chest, taking care in drawing his prosthetic out from Nines’ now-damp pants. Nines’…android cum coated his palm, the liquid a translucent bluish-white. Gavin wet his lips. “Fuck.”

Nines forced himself forward, catching himself on the edge of the counter and heaving for air. A gentle whirring came from his chest, almost like the purr of a cat. Gavin let him have a few moments to cool down or whatever, Nines’ hands trembling where they gripped the counter.

“You lasted longer than I thought you would, for your first time,” Gavin said, playful, going to Nines’ side to catch a glimpse of his face.

“Stop,” Nines bit back, raising one hand to hide his blue face from Gavin’s gaze. But Gavin saw Nines’ small smile between his fingers, no real aggression in Nines’ words. He fixed his clothing and wiped his saliva from his face, then leaned against Gavin, his chin resting atop Gavin’s head. The whirring slowed, though Gavin still felt Nines’ internal fans through his side. “Where’d that come from?”

Gavin gulped, and all of a sudden remembered the heat coiling, unchecked, within his own body. “W-what do you mean?”

“What made you so bold?” Nines curled his fingers against Gavin’s cheek.

“Oh, uh….” Gavin shrugged and averted his eyes. “I, um….”

Nines drew back to meet Gavin’s gaze with a small frown. “It was repayment.” Not a guess.

Gavin shrugged with a strained grin, his prosthetic twitching as he thought of wiping it on his pants. “I-I mean, uh, Merry Christmas?”

Still, Nines looked at him with that frown, disapproval lingering in his gaze. “Like I said this morning, Gavin,” Nines said, soft, nonchalant as he cupped Gavin’s cheek and ran his thumb over Gavin’s heated skin. “I don’t pleasure you with ulterior motives. I just….” He smiled, something softer than lust flashing behind his eyes. “I like seeing you relaxed and happy. Pleasuring you is just a bonus.”

Gavin wet his lips and gulped. Of course. Nines was…Nines was too much, too perfect. “Still, I-I—“

“Shh.” Nines drew Gavin close to press a soft kiss between his eyes. “Thank you, Gavin. It was an experience I’ll never forget. But….” He took Gavin’s prosthetic and intertwined their fingers, not listening to Gavin’s protests of not letting his cum smear onto his hand. “If what we did was a present, that means it can only be done on special occasions, correct?”

Gavin furrowed his brow. “What do you…? Oh.” He gulped, eyes wide.

“You understand?” Nines laughed and kissed Gavin’s cheek. “I’d like to do that more often than a special occasion would allow.”

Gavin nodded with an affirmative hum, exhaling hard and fast. “Yeah yeah, good, wasn’t a present, I don’t celebrate Christmas, right—“ He clutched Nines’ shirt, his prior cockiness long forgotten.

Nines silenced him with a finger on his lips. “Would you like me to help you?” He nodded toward Gavin’s dick, hard and straining in his pants.

It was tempting, Gavin had to admit that. “I….” He wet his lips, then relaxed his grip on Nines’ shirt and shook his head. “I’ll go, uh, shower this off. This was about you.”

With a nod, Nines pulled away to the sink, turning on the faucet to wash his hands. “I am quite glad for that.”

“Shut up, Nines.” Gavin looked to his prosthetic, lost. “Is this, uh, waterproof?”

Nines flicked the water off his hands and wiped them off with a small towel. “Yes, but it would be good to make sure nothing slipped through the plates.” He placed the towel on the counter and brushed his fingers over Gavin’s bicep, where plastic and flesh met. “I can clean it for you while you shower. Is that okay?”

Gavin nodded and let his plate disengage the connection, the prosthetic clicking off and falling limp into Nines’ waiting hands. Gavin shifted his weight, so much lighter on his right side. “Thank you.”

“It’s no problem.” Nines leaned forward and kissed Gavin’s cheek. “I’ll heat your dinner back up as well. Don’t take too long, now.”

“Y-yeah.” Gavin furrowed his brow, guilt seeping into his expression. “Sorry about your, uh, pants.”

Nines let out a soft laugh. “It’s not uncomfortable. Besides, I can always take them off later, right?”

Gavin gulped and nodded. “Yeah, of course, right.” He bit his lip, then caught Nines’ chin and pressed a soft kiss to the bite mark on Nines’ neck. “That looks good on you, y’know.” Before Nines could reply, Gavin turned, cheeks a flaming red, and disappeared into the bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nines had big bottom energy in this one and I honestly can’t complain


	18. Little Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin gulped, eyes burning, and reached back with his prosthetic, catching Nines’ hand. “...Please don’t go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> college is kicking my ass already and I'm only a week in, my bad, updates will be slower from here on out :') I'm just as sad

Gavin sat back against the arm of his couch, the prongs of a fork wedged between his lips. Something felt…off about this whole scene, Gavin knew, but what? He pulled his fork from his mouth and tapped it, slow, against his lips, his gaze toward his kitchen.

Nines looked…good. He wore an old pair of Gavin’s fraying boxers, the fabric stretched low and tight on his hips, as he took out the bag of Jo’s kibble and scooped an exact amount into her bowl. Jo curled around Nines’ calves with an aggressive meow, and Nines let out a gentle laugh as he placed the bowl on the floor.

“So impatient,” Nines said, running his fingers down Jo’s back. “Learned from your roommate, I suppose.”

Gavin turned back to his food and muffled his embarrassed huff with another forkful of fried vegetables. Something pleasant bloomed within his chest. Something like…contentment. Belonging. A feeling Gavin hadn’t felt in…. Well. Maybe ever.

He shoveled more food into his mouth, turning his attention to his TV and the gunfight on the screen. Soon, the tenseness lingering within his muscles relaxed—or, as much as they could as he watched the fight with bated breath.

“What’d I miss?” Nines said, stepping up to the couch.

Gavin moved his legs as Nines sat down and leaned back against the couch, then stretched his legs back out over Nines’ lap. “Kate’s been a fuckin’ badass,” Gavin said through a mouthful of food. “She shot down two of the suspects, then fucking _tackled_ that one guy— The one in the gross bloody jacket.”

Nines hummed, the darkness around his forehead tinted yellow. “And Wyatt?”

“He’s unconscious—”

With a scoff, Nines leaned more toward Gavin. “You don’t tell me this crucial information first?”

Gavin kicked at Nines’ lap and stretched to place his empty plate on the coffee table, his arm bearing his weight on the floor, cleaned prosthetic pushing the plate onto the table. “Wyatt’s a bitch, Nines, and you know it. He’s only the love interest because he’s hot and all they got.”

Nines pulled Gavin up and into his arms, his hands exploring Gavin’s back. “Oh? I find him…familiar, you could say, to someone I know far too well.”

“Oh, yeah? Who?” Gavin furrowed his brow in confusion, complacent in Nines’ embrace.

“You’d become aggressive if I told you.” But Nines chuckled and kissed Gavin’s head, one of his hands slipping beneath the hem of Gavin’s shirt. That yellow glow hadn’t changed. Yet, after a few moments of Gavin shifting, shuddering, as Nines ran his warm fingers over Gavin’s torso, the yellow glow dulled to a deep crimson. “I have to ask you another question, Gavin.”

“What now?” Gavin whimpered, as much as he’d like to not admit it, and breathed a slow exhale, eyes heavy and lidded. “Can’t you just, uh….” He broke off to bury his face against Nines’ shoulder.

Nines sighed. His hand trailed slow across the expanse of Gavin’s chest, making a point to trace every faded scar, every old bullet wound, everything he’d had the chance to map and memorize but hadn’t until this one moment. The gentle pressure of Nines’ hand drew low groans from Gavin’s throat, stirring up the heat he’d had to dissipate with a long, cold shower.

“Would you mind if I performed some physical therapy on you? The most I can do right now is a massage. You haven’t had many chances to continue keeping your body at its peak condition—”

“ _Nines,_ ” Gavin snapped, “you’re such a fucking dick.”

Nines only laughed and pressed a kiss to Gavin’s forehead. “You need it, Sparky. It’ll be fast, then we can head right to bed. Is that okay?”

With an exasperated groan, Gavin gave in. “Wish you were talking about something else right now.” But he nodded and slumped against Nines’ chest. “What do I do?”

“Lie on your stomach.” Nines pulled away from Gavin and shifted off the couch, kneeling on the floor so Gavin had more room. “I haven’t prepared any items to aid in releasing your muscle tension, so I hope my hands are enough.”

“Your hands are always enough,” Gavin muttered, almost like an insult. He heaved a sigh and followed Nines’ instructions, crossing his arms and resting his chin against them as he faced Nines. “Now what?”

Nines ran one of his hands down Gavin’s back, his other adjusting the position of Gavin’s head. “Relax and stay still.” He slipped his hands under Gavin’s shirt. “I also wanted to use this time to talk to you about what’ll happen when we return to work.”

“Yeah?” Gavin let out a hiss as Nines dug his fingers into his shoulders, much harder than the soft touches earlier. “ _Fuck—_ Uh, what about it?”

Nines didn’t say anything for a moment, the darkness tinted yellow. “Captain Fowler briefed me on a basic mission plan today. He believes I am the best one for the job, considering the knowledge I gained on our last mission.”

“Uh-huh,” Gavin groaned out, biting back a yelp as Nines rubbed deep on a spot near Gavin’s side. “Jesus _Christ,_ Nines, are you doing this right?”

“I have downloaded all information I can on this topic, so yes, I believe so.” Nines ran his fingers over the sore spot, gentle, almost apologetic. “You’re just tense and knotted up. It’ll feel better after a while, I promise.”

Gavin let out a grunt of affirmation. “Whatever. What’s this mission Fowler wants you to do? Is it boring? Just, like, patrols or something?” He chuckled, it breaking off into a whimper of pain.

“No. He….” Yellow light flashed into red. “He wishes for me to find the second location of Zeus’ operation and gain knowledge there.”

“ _What?_ ” Gavin shot up, letting out a sharp cry as his hand flew to rub his back. “He—he can’t— _shit_ —make you do that!”

Nines frowned. “He isn’t. I believe I’m the best option to continue this case.”

“But—?” Gavin floundered, then collapsed onto the couch cushions, complacent, but not defeated. “You _can’t_ fucking go undercover again.”

“And why not?” Nines slid Gavin’s shirt up his back and moved to sit at the edge of the cushions, his fingers a deep pressure on Gavin’s lower back. “I was created to go on dangerous missions, to react faster to obstacles, to encounter unsavory people. There’s no reason for me to not go. Are you worried about me?”

Gavin opened his mouth to protest the opposite, but a memory flashed before his eyes: blue blood spraying from a broken chassis, a cold, rusted shovel, a pained scream from a voice that never should’ve been able to express pain. Gavin gulped, eyes burning, and reached back with his prosthetic, catching Nines’ hand. “...Please don’t go.”

Nines didn’t move, frozen on the spot, conflicting emotions flicking behind his eyes. “Someone has to. You know that, Gavin, so tell me who you’d rather send.”

_Me,_ Gavin wanted to say, but he knew Nines would shoot back with his infuriating logic and reasoning. Instead, Gavin squeezed Nines’ hand and rolled to his back, pulling Nines down and pressing a soft kiss to his lips. Words choked up, he whispered the only thing he could think to say at the moment, “I…I wanna go to bed.”

“Okay,” Nines said, just as quiet, and wrapped an arm under Gavin’s back, his other slipping under Gavin’s legs. He lifted Gavin up, holding him close to his chest as he carried Gavin to the bathroom.

Nines set Gavin onto the floor, letting Gavin’s feet hit the tile before letting him go. Gavin took his time brushing his teeth, then spit into the sink and wiped his mouth off with his sleeve before turning back to Nines to lean against his chest.

“Thank you for taking care of yourself,” Nines murmured as he ran his fingers through strands of Gavin’s hair, holding him and rocking back and forth, helping him forget what plagued his mind. “I’m sorry about the miss—”

“I don’t wanna talk about that tonight,” Gavin cut in. “Please, Nines, today’s been shitty enough.” With a small frown, Nines nodded with a yellow glow, lifting Gavin back up, this time having Gavin wrap his arms around Nines’ shoulders and his legs around Nines’ waist before carrying him to his room.

Once Nines set Gavin down, Gavin tightened his grip around Nines’ shoulders. “Stay.”

“Demanding, aren’t you?” But Nines smiled, broad and bright, and climbed into the bed next to Gavin. As they settled under the covers, Nines grabbed something from Gavin’s side table, then turned on his side for Gavin to snuggle against his chest. “Forgot something?”

“Mm?” Gavin’s eyes fluttered open, his gaze unfocused as he settled on Nines’ blurry image. “What’re you talkin’ about?”

Nines pushed something into Gavin’s hands, prying Gavin’s fingers from his shirt. “Your recorder.”

With a groan, Gavin rolled over and clicked on the recorder. “I’m _so_ fuckin’ tired—”

Nines pulled Gavin flush to his chest and pressed a kiss to the nape of Gavin’s neck. “Considering your nap you took for four hours and eight minutes, I’m surprised.”

Gavin gulped, sobering at Nines’ touch. “Uh, well, hmm. Anyway….” He drew in a slow breath, thinking from the beginning of the day, when everything was, well, perfect. “I…well, I celebrated Christmas for the first time in…years.” He couldn’t help a shiver as Nines’ fingertips fluttered across the expanse of his chest. “It was….” What was it? It had felt…normal. As if, with all the other surprises and despairs that had happened at the end of this fucking year, Gavin had somehow integrated himself into an even more normal life than the one before his accident.

He supposed he knew who was responsible for that.

“It was fun,” Gavin finished as Nines smiled against his neck. “It was…new. I was nervous as shit, but, uh, it all turned out really well. Like, stupidly well.” He paused, something tightening up his throat. “I’ve…never been this…happy in my life, I think. Stupid, since I lost my damn arm, but…I think that I, um, I’m getting better. I’m getting better.” Gavin grinned, thin, silent trails of tears rolling down his face. “I still can’t really even believe it. I…I thought I’d never get better, y’know?”

Nines had to have known that was rhetorical, but he offered a sleepy, “Mmn-hmm,” in response. Could androids get sleepy?

Either way, Gavin shivered. He wet his lips and continued, “But I am. Uh, getting better. A-and, uh, I have Nines to thank for that.”

“Much of it was you, too, Gavin.”

Gavin shook his head. “No, if I didn’t have you helping me, I’m sure I’d be…. I dunno. It’d be bad.”

Nines nodded, the darkness in Gavin’s right peripheral colored yellow from Nines’ glowing LED. “I’m so proud of how far you’ve come, Sparky.”

“S-shut up.” Gavin took a deep, deep breath. “Still, though, today…. Even with all the good stuff, I….” He exhaled, shaky, hand trembling as it held the recorder. “I talked to Peter and…he showed a video of me destroying Nines’—”

“That wasn’t you,” Nines was quick to cut in. “It was _not_ you, Gavin. It was Peter’s memory, so it’s in his perspective.” Nines held Gavin close, drawing one hand up to curl his fingers against Gavin’s collarbone. “I’m okay, Sparky. It wasn’t you.”

Gavin nodded, breath coming in quick gasps. “R-right.” He gulped, hard. “Nines—um, Nines took care of Peter when he kept me connected to him, um, and I was….” Gavin shook his head, curling in on himself and pressing back against Nines’ chest. “I was so fucking scared,” he whispered. “I—I’d thought Nines was hurt again, I’d thought that…I dunno. I-I don’t know. I just— I hated it. I really hated it. It freaks me the fuck out when he’s covered in blood like that, and I—” His breath hitched as Nines gave Gavin a light squeeze and pressed a long kiss to his shoulder. “I-I’m really glad you’re okay.”

Nines let out a hum and rested his forehead against Gavin’s nape. “Me too.” He trailed his fingers up and down Gavin’s chest, spreading comfort and contentment throughout Gavin’s torso, the feeling weighing down his eyelids, slowing the beat of his heart, banishing the dark thoughts from his mind. “Goodnight, Gavin.”

“Ah….” Gavin nodded and rubbed his eyes, then let his hand fall to the mattress. “Mm, ‘night, Nines.”

Nines sat up to press a kiss to Gavin’s cheek, then took the recorder from Gavin’s limp hands and turned it off. He took care to not jostle Gavin as he placed the recorder back on the bedside table, then rolled to his side to hold Gavin close as Gavin’s breathing evened out, his body relaxed.

At that moment, Gavin forgot what it felt like to be alone.

* * *

Gavin’s eyes fluttered open to glistening sunlight filtering through a sliver of his parted curtains. With a soft, content sigh, Gavin stretched his limbs and sprawled out across his bed, his prosthetic slapping against empty space instead of Nines.

For a hot, pulsing second, fire _seared_ through Gavin’s body, adrenaline beating thick through his blood. He shot up in bed and fumbled to untangle himself from the bedsheets, able to get as far as slipping off the edge and onto the floor with a thud before rapid footsteps rushed into the room.

“What’s wrong?” Nines gasped out, eyes wide, LED hinting at yellow. “Gavin, are you alright?” He stepped over to Gavin and placed a tray of food on the bed— Oh.

Gavin nodded as Nines drew him against his chest, Gavin clutching Nines’ shirt with trembling fingers. “I-I dunno why I—”

“You thought I’d left,” Nines answered, simple, and all the pieces clicked into place.

“...Mmn-hmm.” Gavin couldn’t think of words as he let Nines pull him back into bed. Nines drew the blanket over Gavin before sitting on the bedside, taking Gavin’s hand in his own and lifting the back of it to his lips. Gavin couldn’t look him in the eye. “Sorry,” he whispered, suppressing a shiver as Nines’ thumb ran across his knuckles. “You, uh, what’d you make?”

Nines pressed another kiss to Gavin’s hand and played with the fingers, his thumb feather-light over Gavin’s palm. “Omelette, bacon, coffee, etcetera.” He kissed the tip of Gavin’s forefinger, his gaze taking on a tender concern like welcoming snow reflecting the deep blue sky. “It doesn’t matter. Tell me what’s on your mind, Sparky.”

Gavin gulped. “I….” He shook his head, locking his gaze on his lap. “Fuck, I’m just…worried. Okay?”

Nines hummed and kissed Gavin’s middle finger. “As expected. I…am, too.” He sighed, turning Gavin’s hand to cup his cheek, holding Gavin’s hand close. “I don’t like thinking about how dangerous it’ll be. But, still, it’s important to see it to its completion. If this job wasn’t dangerous, there wouldn’t be crime in the first place.”

“Yeah, yeah I know.” Gavin let out a sigh and swiped his thumb across Nines’ cheek. “You’re super awesome, you’ll be fine.”

Nines laughed, expression bright. “Are you still half-asleep, Sparky?”

“I’m not!” Gavin shifted, gaze flitting about his room. “Um, just— You know what I fucking mean. You’re—advanced, or whatever. You only….” The fingers of his prosthetic curled into a fist. “You only got hurt last time because I got in the way.”

“Oh, Gavin, no….” Nines blew out a sigh and leaned forward, drawing Gavin into a hug. “You were never in the way. You were sick, wounded— If I have to say it a million times I will: it was _not_ your fault.”

Gavin only shrugged, his face buried against Nines’ shoulder. It wasn’t that Gavin couldn’t believe Nines’ words—the words themselves were fine—it was that Gavin couldn’t believe they came from Nines himself. Nines got hurt because Gavin was…weak. Reckless.

Human.

“Thank you,” Gavin managed to whisper, “for being with me this whole time. For taking…for taking care of me.”

Nines brought his fingers to Gavin’s chin and tilted his head up, up, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. “I can’t imagine choosing to do anything else, Gavin. I only hope you’ll continue to let me do so as time passes.”

Gavin wanted to hide his face, heated as it was, but somehow, he held Nines’ gaze. “I…I think I’d like that, tin can.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaaaa I want Nines to spoon me too tf


	19. Normality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “‘Forget’ my ass,” Gavin muttered. “You don’t forget anything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slow and steady, we're getting to the fun part ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) also thank y'all for your patience it's greatly appreciated :')

A low, simple melody trickled out the speakers of Gavin’s phone, it grating against Gavin’s ears. Gavin didn’t glance to it, didn’t have to, knowing the tune for a ‘Game Over’ by heart. The corner of Gavin’s lips twitched downward, and he turned off his phone and rested it on his lap, leaning back in his chair, uncrossing and recrossing his feet where they rested up on his desk. He didn’t tear his eyes from Fowler’s office and the two within.

The glass walls of the office trembled with the force of Fowler’s voice, the glass warping and muffling his words too much for the outside world to comprehend. Fowler’s outburst didn’t last too long, the office growing quiet as Fowler paced back and forth in front of his desk, his fingers digging against his temples. He turned back to face Nines, his lips moving, Gavin too far away to even try to guess at what was said. Fowler stepped closer and rested his hand on Nines’ shoulder, Nines nodding along to whatever he’d said, then Nines turned and left the office once Fowler drew his hand back to his side.

Gavin turned back to his phone as Nines drew closer and grimaced at the ‘Game Over’ still on the screen. He closed out of the app and decided to start fucking around on Twitter, losing himself in the repetitive motions.

Nines settled himself into his chair with a creak of its hinges, and even with all the distractions in the world, Gavin couldn’t ignore Nines’ voice. “How’s your work coming along, Gavin?”

“Amazingly,” Gavin muttered, hating how spiteful the word sounded, dread, fear, and worry dripping venom onto his tongue.

In the corner of Gavin’s eye, Nines frowned, and only when Nines turned his attention to his terminal did Gavin look up from his phone. Nines’ gaze stayed locked on his screen, his hand a smooth, shiny white over the keyboard. Something felt…wrong, Nines’ face devoid of expression, and something heavy settled in the pit of Gavin’s gut.

Gavin lowered his feet to the floor and drew himself closer to his desk, then batted a hand in Nines’ direction until he looked over. “Um,” Gavin began, grace in his every word, tongue thick in his mouth, unease coiling in his chest. “What was Fowler yelling at you about?”

“The mission, as is always the case now.” Nines sighed and twisted his chair to better face Gavin over their desks. “I asked Captain Fowler if he’d allow you to at least monitor some of the information I sent back.”

“You….” Gavin blinked, averting his gaze to the side with a frown as he shoved his phone in his pocket. “Well, I can guess he didn’t really…like that.”

With a shake of his head, Nines lifted his elbows to his desk, laced his fingers together, and rested his chin atop the bridge. “No.” A pause. “He worries about you.”

“No shit,” Gavin said with a scoff. “I just…. Thanks for tryin’ to get me in on some of it.”

At that, Nines smiled. “It’s not a problem, Gavin. I understand how important my safety is to you.”

Gavin bit back a hiss and leapt from his chair, leaning over his desk to slap his hand over Nines’ mouth. “Can you just shut the fuck up for once? God.” He kept his voice quiet, his threat a low growl as it left his throat. “I just, I—”

Nines didn’t break Gavin’s gaze and blinked slow, almost batting his eyes, before parting his lips and licking up over Gavin’s palm. Gavin choked down a shriek as he jumped back and fell into his chair with a clatter of pens, papers, and an old framed photo of Jo from his desk. “You’re like a fuckin’ child,” Gavin snapped, even as laughter bubbled in his throat, and he wiped his palm on his pants. He fixed up his mess and straightened in his chair, casting a playful glare at Nines.

And Nines giggled, not trying too hard to prove Gavin wrong. “I’m sorry, my maturity module must be malfunctioning.”

“Damn, that’s a tongue twister and a half.” But Gavin laughed, soft, trying to not let that fill with dread, too. “Well? You can at least tell me about what you’re gonna be doing, right?”

Nines nodded. “You don’t have much to worry about. Gathering intel is my sole objective; it’ll be nothing too dangerous.” He shot Gavin a reassuring smile. “From the information you got from Peter,” Nines said the name as if it were a poison within his mouth, “the other camp seems to focus more on anti-android protests rather than drug deals. Still unsavory, but marginally safer than the drug trade.”

With a strained bark of a laugh, Gavin leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. He blew out a sigh. “I guess I can’t say you’re wrong there.” Even so, worry tugged down the corners of his lips, anxiety his constant companion. “When are you leaving?”

Nines’ LED flashed yellow. “Early tomorrow morning.”

Gavin dug his fingers into his arms, nails imprinting crescents in his leather jacket, metal biting through both leather and skin. “Oh.” He urged his next words to leave his throat, his heart pounding heavy in his chest. “How, um, long, do you think?”

“It should be a quick operation.” Nines lowered his gaze for a moment. “I should be back by the end of the week.”

Relief flooded Gavin’s system as his body melted against his chair, his shaking hands falling to his lap. “I, um…. That’s good.” He gulped, flicking his gaze up to meet Nines’, only to lower it back to his terminal. “You….”

Nines stood from his chair and rounded their desks, resting his palm on Gavin’s side desk and leaning to the left, his lithe body curved like sin as he examined Gavin with his piercing gaze. Gavin wasn’t sure how long Nines stood there, scanning him. What more could he get in ten silent seconds that he couldn’t get from three? But for some reason, Gavin didn’t dare break the quiet, even as it curled his hands back into fists and pushed distress hot and burning against his glossy eyes.

Then, Nines spoke. “Would you like some coffee?”

Gavin gaped, wide-eyed, oh so worried, oh so terrified— “Uh, sure,” he murmured. “Whatever.” But before Nines moved to leave, Gavin leapt from his seat and grasped onto the fabric of Nines’ sleeve. “But I’ll, uh, come with you.”

A soft smile brightened Nines’ face. “I'd like that.” He raised his hand to take hold of Gavin’s, then led him to the break room. The smell of coffee beans and vending machine snacks assaulted Gavin’s nose as they walked in, as if the doorway held an invisible forcefield keeping the aroma in and the bustle of the bullpen out.

Gavin drew his hand from Nines’ hold as they came up to the coffee machines. Even with the warmth that contact brought to Gavin’s chest, self-consciousness bared its teeth against Gavin’s throat at the sight of Chris in the corner of the room, sipping a coffee and looking through a magazine.

Gavin ran his thumb across the back of his prosthetic’s hand. “Um, thanks for, uh, wanting to get me something,” he said, softer than needed. Heat, both pleasant and not, boiled beneath his skin at Nines’ quiet laugh.

“You’re too cute.” Nines rested his hand on Gavin’s collarbone, his touch gentle as his fingers slid over Gavin’s chest, placing teasing pressure on healing bruises.

Gavin batted Nines’ hand away, his frown losing a battle with his smile. “Sh-shut the fuck up.”

“Aww.” Nines cupped Gavin’s cheek and grinned, bright and relaxed. “I never imagined you this shy, Detective.”

“Nines, I fucking swear to God—” But Gavin’s own broad smile drowned any aggression in his tone. Unable to talk, he grabbed Nines’ hand with his prosthetic and forced out his plea: _[Chris is right there, dumbass! Please?]_

Nines stilled, an excess giggle slipping past his closed lips. “Understood.” He turned to the coffee machine and tapped Gavin’s preferred buttons, and as he waited for the cup to fill, he murmured, “I enjoy teasing you, Gavin.”

A new wave of heat, all pleasant, rolled down Gavin’s body. “Oh, shut up.”

Another laugh fell from Nines’ lips, and he muffled it with the back of his hand. Gavin gulped at the sight. “Did you mean it, yesterday morning, when you said you appreciated me taking care of you?”

“Oh my God, you _ass._ ” Gavin buried his heated face in his palms, heaving a long and distressed sigh. For a moment, he weighed his options, all types of answers and non-answers flitting through his head, fast as a maddening swarm of butterflies.

He settled on something simple. “Yeah,” Gavin croaked through his fingers, the darkness of his palms a strange comfort. “I meant it.”

Nines took Gavin’s wrists and drew his hands from his face, meeting Gavin’s timid eyes with a small laugh that made Gavin’s heart flutter. “Those words mean so much to me. You know that?”

“I-I can guess.” Gavin’s eyes flitted about the break room, never settling on one thing for long. “Now fuckin’ seriously, Nines.” Gavin pulled his hands from Nines’ hold and snatched his coffee, downing a gulp of the steaming liquid before heading back to the bullpen, Nines content to follow at his side.

Gavin fell back into his chair and hiked one leg on his desk, his other crossed on his lap. With a slow sip of his coffee, Gavin aimed a finger at Nines. “Now tell me more about your dumbass mission, prick.”

Nines laughed, content to sit on Gavin’s side desk. Gavin forced down the warmth in his gut; Nines took up the space like he belonged there, like it was the most natural thing in the world. “Connor will be the only one able to communicate with me, as it stands.” He sighed. “It’s easy to decode encrypted messages with him, and it’s faster than going through the DPD’s terminals themselves. Connor will, of course, upload the decrypted data to the case’s database and so on.” Nines let out a chuckle and cocked his head. “Am I making sense, Detective?”

“Uh….” Gavin coughed into his fist with a nod. “I, um, think so. So Connor’s gonna be the one to talk with you, huh?”

Nines nodded. “There’s still more we need to go over, of course, but that’s a definite.” He tipped his head up with a hum. “I’ll have to change a part of my appearance as well, and of course remove my LED again.” At that, Nines looked down to meet Gavin’s gaze. “I’d been thinking about letting you hold onto it until I come home.”

Gavin choked on his coffee, hacking for air as he leaned over and placed the cup on his desk. “Gah, uh, fuck. Um.” He gulped, his fingers rubbing at his throat. “I, uh, I mean, sure. If that’s what you wanna do.”

With a smile, Nines slid off Gavin’s desk, trailing his fingertips along the edge. “I think I’d like it if you did.” He tilted his head, gazing at Gavin in such a way that crept fire up Gavin’s spine. “As for finalizing the details, I have to speak with Connor before I leave today.” He reached out and rested his hand on Gavin’s head, petting down his hair as Gavin suppressed a shudder and wet his lips. “And, before I forget….” Nines leaned down, pressing a kiss to Gavin’s temple, Gavin’s face aflame.

“‘Forget’ my ass,” Gavin muttered. “You don’t forget anything.”

Nines straightened with a chuckle and traced his finger along Gavin’s jawline. “You caught me.” He drew back, tapping Gavin’s desk. “I’ll be leaving around twelve thirty; I need extra time to prepare dinner.”

“Wait, what?” Gavin frowned, brow furrowed deep. “You have to start dinner at fuckin’ _noon?_ Why can’t you wait the extra thirty minutes so we can leave together?”

At that, Nines gave Gavin a sly grin. “Did you _want_ to leave together?”

Gavin flinched with wide eyes, glad he no longer had the cup of coffee in his grasp. “Ah, uh— _God,_ you’re such a prick.” He sighed, strained, and shook his head. “Why the hell are you starting dinner at noon?”

The corner of Nines’ lips twitched upward. “I’ll be preparing something…special.”

Gavin didn’t miss the dark tone hidden in Nines’ voice. “Uh, what’s that supposed to mean?”

Nines let out a hum and drew a finger to his smirk as he leaned forward, Gavin’s breath catching in his throat. “It’s a surprise, one I think you’ll enjoy quite a bit.” With that, Nines drew away, giving Gavin room to breathe. “Work hard, Gavin. I’ll see you around one.” He glanced back at Gavin one last time before heading across the bullpen to Connor’s desk.

Gavin exhaled, tipping his head back against his chair and staring up at the ceiling. God, Nines was a tease. And starting dinner at noon? What the fuck was Nines thinking? Still, Gavin lifted his hand to his forehead and let out another sigh, his heart thrumming in his chest, adrenaline and excitement pulsing through his blood. Nines’ surprises always turned out good, so Gavin could only imagine what this one could be.

Especially if it was the last time they’d see each other for a while.

Gavin dragged his hand down his face, snatching his cup of coffee and taking a sip before turning to his terminal. With a deep breath, he stretched his arms above his head, then got back to work. It might’ve been the least he could do for Nines at this point, what with Nines planning something special for him and all. Gavin lost himself in the paperwork, lost himself in its repetitiveness, his thoughts drifting from his task as the muscle memory took over.

As Gavin thought about it, he realized Nines had always been a bit of a tease. Maybe not so much in the beginning, but, well, Gavin had been…fragile, then. But now? Now that Gavin wasn’t quite as frail as he’d once been, Nines had gotten more creative, gotten bolder, had pushed him _harder,_ taunted him to no end with bites and bruises even as he whispered praises in Gavin’s ear.

A shudder ran down Gavin’s spine, and he knew he couldn’t lie to himself anymore. Gavin wet his lips, only able to imagine what Nines had in store for him, a thought that reduced Gavin to staring, blank, at his terminal for…he didn’t know how long.

A hand on his shoulder shocked Gavin out of his reverie. “Jesus fuck—!” Gavin spun in his chair, his cheeks a burning red. “Shit, uh— Tina? What the hell do you want?”

Tina raised her hands in surrender, eyes wide while a shit-eating grin took up the majority of her face. “Woah there, Gav, what’d I walk in on?”

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” Gavin wiped his sweaty palm on his pants and glanced to the side. “What’s up?”

“ _Well,_ ” Tina began, overemphasizing the word as she fixed her cap, “I thought I’d catch you before you left to talk to you about, um, possibly rooming with you while Nines is gone?”

Gavin blinked. “What?”

Tina rolled her eyes and walked over to Nines’ desk, plopping into his chair and scooting it over to the side of Gavin’s desk. “I mean, you’re still gonna need help making sure you don’t set your apartment on fire or, like, malfunction or something.” She grinned. “How about it?”

Gavin couldn’t resist mirroring her expression. “I mean, sure. I wouldn’t mind catching up with you after, uh…everything.”

Tina shot Gavin a melancholic smile. “Yeah, me either.” A moment passed, Tina lowering her gaze to the tabletop before scooting the chair back to its place, letting it glide to a stop. She stood and went back to Gavin’s side, patting him on the shoulder. Gavin tried not to wince as she hit one of Nines’ bite marks. “I’ll bring all my stuff around…noon tomorrow, got it?”

“Got it,” Gavin said around a laugh. “And you’re _definitely_ telling me about…Mia, was it?”

That caused Tina’s face to flush a dark crimson. “Uh, haha, _bitch_.” She took a few steps back, a playful spunk in her eye as she raised her middle finger at Gavin. “I was gonna tell you to go home and relax, but now I hope your cab ends up in a ditch.”

“Aww,” Gavin drawled. “Is Tina shy?”

“You’re one to talk, Gavin,” Chris called from his desk.

Gavin sputtered, glancing back as Tina burst into laughter. “I’m gonna fuckin’ _kill_ you, Miller.”

Chris didn’t turn in his chair, just shrugged, muffling his snickers as he continued typing on his keyboard. “Have a nice rest of the day, Reed.”

With a set jaw, Gavin closed out of his terminal and pushed away from his desk, getting to his feet with a grunt. “Yeah, you too,” he muttered as he stretched out his sore muscles. “God, get back to work, Tina.”

“Whew, never thought I’d hear _you_ of all people say that.” But Tina nudged Gavin’s side, letting out one last giggle and a, “See ya!” before heading back to her desk.

Gavin took a deep breath and grabbed his jacket, slipping it on before heading out of the building. He exhaled a hot breath over his hand, the outside chill setting over his skin as he waited by the street for a cab. As his stomach let out a weak growl, Gavin tipped his head back and sighed. Eh, he had time to make a quick sandwich at home. Nines’ surprise couldn’t be anything too urgent, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surpriseeeeee I wonder what Nines planned owo oh boy


	20. Don't Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 01000111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100010 01101111 01111001

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been planning this for the longest time guys and now it's finally here aaaaaaaaa this turned out way, way longer than intended, but I guess that's what happens when you write porn— I mean, uh...surprise? this is definitely all porn.........definitely................. uh, good luck y'all

Silence met Gavin’s return to his apartment. Gavin frowned as he stepped into the entryway and closed the door behind him, locking it as he slipped his jacket off one shoulder and then the other to hang it on the door’s hook alongside Nines’ own. “Nines?” Gavin called, brow furrowed. More silence.

That ass. With a scoff and a shake of his head, Gavin pushed down his dread and headed to rummage through his kitchen cabinets for a quick lunch. He found a granola bar, half-flattened under a box of oatmeal, and leaned back against his counter as he peeled open the bar’s packaging.

Muffled static rang through the quiet. Gavin twitched at the sound and lifted his prosthetic to his head, the static a low hum that sent tingles through the plastic and metal. “Nines,” Gavin called again, urgency in his tone, annoyance in the word.

The static dropped into a deep, almost husky, purr that caressed Gavin’s shoulders and arms, coiled around his body with heavy vibrations that sent tremors down Gavin’s spine. Gavin fumbled to discard his wrapper, his limbs heavy and shaking. The static pulsed, urged Gavin further into the apartment, a trail of vibrations warping the space around him like heat bending the air. The trail led him to his bedroom door.

Ah. So it was _that_ type of surprise.

Gavin gulped and brought his hand to the knob, palm trembling as the static condensed, thrummed against his chest, his hips, his thighs. The second the door cracked open, the static disappeared as if it had never been there in the first place. Gavin let out a shuddering breath at the darkness of his bedroom, wary, before stepping inside and reaching for his light.

Before he could flip the switch, Gavin yelped as a force pulled him away and slammed his door shut, then rammed his back against the wood, Gavin sucking in a hiss through clenched teeth. With a gasp, lungs heaving for air, Gavin whimpered as Nines worked his leg between Gavin’s and pressed his knee against Gavin’s groin. “Welcome home,” Nines murmured with a deep chuckle, breath hot against Gavin’s ear, his fingers feather-light as they trailed down Gavin’s sides.

A shiver rolled down Gavin’s spine. He gulped, hard, and wrapped his arms around Nines’ shoulders as he forced out a breathy, “Hey.” Nines let out a small laugh and pressed a light kiss to Gavin’s jaw, peppering them down his neck, Gavin tipping his head back with a needy sigh. “B-been waiting long?”

“Not too long.” Nines dragged his teeth along Gavin’s throat and drew his nails down Gavin’s back, a shudder shooting down Gavin’s spine. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” Gavin said around a weak whimper, arching toward Nines’ touch. “You’re good. So good….” He turned his head to catch Nines’ lips with his own and let out a pitiful, needy whine into the kiss. And Nines _growled,_ Gavin’s heart leaping in his throat. They parted with a gasp, Gavin fighting for breath as he drew his hands back, fingers fumbling for the hem of his shirt.

“Shh….” Nines caught Gavin’s wrists, Gavin becoming still as Nines ran his thumbs over the backs of his hands, oh so slow, oh so soothing. “Let me.” Nines released Gavin’s wrists, then took the hem of Gavin’s shirt and lifted it, motions unhurried, up over Gavin’s head. Nines let the shirt drop, then brought Gavin’s hands to his shoulders and ran his hands down Gavin’s back, a shiver chasing the motion under Gavin’s skin. “You’re beautiful.”

Gavin bit his lip with a strained mewl, Nines’ eyes following the action. “Shut up, you ass.” But his breath caught in his throat, his fingers grasping around the cloth of Nines’ shirt as he rocked his hips against Nines’ leg. “Oh, fuck, Nines, just— Hurry?”

With a contemplative hum, Nines tipped his head to the side and cupped Gavin’s cheek as he gave his answer with a smile. “No.” Sharp and mischievous, the word drew a desperate whine from Gavin’s parted lips. “I’m going to take my time,” Nines continued, trailing his hands down Gavin’s chest, his nails catching over the bumps of Gavin’s scars. “I’m going to leave you desperate, sobbing for me, and then, finally, after all you can do is beg, I’m going to fuck you so hard into your mattress the only thing you’ll be able to make out is the sound of my name on your lips and the feeling of my cock inside you.”

Gavin let out a raspy sob and clutched Nines’ shoulders with trembling hands. “No, no, Nines please no, hurry, hurry—“

Nines silenced Gavin with a gentle kiss. “You’re off to a perfect start, Sparky.”

“Fuckin’—“ Gavin snarled, digging his nails against Nines’ back. “Don’t be an ass!”

Nines purred as his hands trailed down to the button of Gavin’s pants and popped it open. “Maybe if you’re good, I’ll go faster.” He cupped the tent in Gavin’s pants, drawing a gasp from Gavin’s throat. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Y-yeah,” Gavin breathed around a broken hiccup, hating how laced with need the word was, how desperate. He tested another roll of his hips down on Nines’ leg, arching against Nines’ touch, letting out a gasp at the friction. “Nines, oh fuck, _please,_ I want— I need—“ He groaned, sliding his hands over Nines’ chest, each new inhale broken by a lewd moan. Heat seared between Gavin’s legs, coiling and coiling and coiling, a fire that consumed all of Gavin’s thoughts, all his actions. Gavin wasn’t sure how long Nines would let him do this, just rut against his unmoving leg, but Gavin buried his face against Nines’ collarbone and chased the heat and friction with his hips anyhow, mewls and gasps slipping past his parted lips.

Nines wrapped his arms around Gavin’s waist and pulled him flush to his chest, Gavin letting out a whine as he was drawn from his trance. “Look at you,” Nines murmured, smirking against Gavin’s temple. “Oh so desperate for pleasure, desperate for me.” He kissed Gavin’s head, trailing gentle kisses down his cheek, jaw, neck. In a soft, husky voice, Nines murmured against Gavin’s skin, “What do you want, Gavin?”

“I-I want….” With shaking hands, Gavin clutched the front of Nines’ shirt, his breath catching in his throat. “You. I want you, Nines. Please.”

With a satisfied hum, Nines stepped back and drew Gavin away from the door, through the darkness, until Nines’ legs hit the back of Gavin’s bed, the frame letting out a slight creak as Nines sat down. “Come here,” Nines said, taking the wrist of Gavin’s prosthetic and tugging, gentle, as his other hand patted his lap. Gavin twitched as a thrum of affection and lust ran up his prosthetic.

“Wait, I….” Gavin panted for air, his legs trembling to keep himself standing as fire pulsed between his thighs. “I wanna try something first.” With a gulp, he lowered to his knees, parting Nines’ legs and settling between them. “You, uh, mind?”

Nines lifted a hand to cover the smile on his face, anticipation dancing within his eyes. A dark yellow glow came from his LED, lighting up the darkness around him. “I don’t mind,” he breathed, words hitching in his throat.

“Good, that’s, uh, great.” Gavin wet his lips. He trailed his hands over Nines’ thighs, letting himself indulge at the sight of Nines shifting and squirming, expression obscured by one hand, the other fisted in Gavin’s sheets. “Take your shirt off.”

A twist of satisfaction bloomed in Gavin’s chest as Nines followed the command, wrenching it off himself with a grace only an android could have. Nines let the shirt fall to the floor, the fabric crumpling into a heap. “Anything else you’d like me to take off?”

Gavin barked out a laugh. “I thought you said you wanted to take your time.”

“With you.” The edges of Nines’ eyes crinkled upwards. “I am a model praised for my superior stamina, after all.”

Gavin sputtered, coughing into his fist. “Well, uh. That’s good, right?” He cleared his throat, then placed his hand back on Nines’ thigh, running his hands up and down, feeling the muscle, the soft flesh, the way they tensed with each movement. “I, uh….”

“Yes, Sparky?” Nines lowered his hand to Gavin’s head with a shaky sigh, showing off his sly, lopsided grin as he threaded his fingers through Gavin’s hair. “What is it you want?”

“Shut it,” Gavin snapped, even as he squeezed Nines’ thighs, drawing a gasp from Nines’ lips that shot pleasure straight down to Gavin’s dick, hot and painful within his too-tight pants. “Let me, uh, um….” He chewed on his bottom lip as he fumbled at Nines’ belt, his gaze unable to lift from his task. Due to anticipation or shyness, Gavin couldn’t tell.

A tremor shot down Gavin’s spine as Nines tightened his grip in Gavin’s hair. “Take your time.”

Nines’ voice…. Gavin wet his lips. Nines’ voice sounded far too steady, far too clear. He had to change that. Gavin drew Nines’ cock from his pants and wrapped his hand around the base, his prosthetic grasping for the hand Nines had curled against the sheets. Through the adrenaline pulsing through both his and Gavin’s bodies, Nines intertwined their fingers, Nines’ skin drawing back and jolting Gavin with coded emotion, raw and overwhelming.

_01000111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100010 01101111 01111001_

With a low purr, Gavin trembled and pumped his hand up and down on Nines’ cock for a moment before he parted his lips and brought it into his mouth. As Gavin sucked at the head, he smirked at Nines’ wet gasp, then pulled off to lap up the side. He let out a hard exhale as Nines tugged on his hair with a ragged gasp, his eyes slipping shut as his nape sparked with pleasure.

“Gavin,” Nines whispered, cheeks flushed cerulean. “Oh, Gavin, you’re so good, fuck….”

There it was. Gavin’s breath caught in his throat and he grinned, shifting closer, rewarding Nines by kissing the head of his cock before taking it back in his mouth, further, stopping halfway before having to come back up. Gavin heaved for air, his chest rising and falling with no clear pattern. The exertion settled heavy at the base of his throat, but his excitement thrummed hot through his blood, set fire to his skin.

Nines’ breath caught in his throat, and he tipped his head back as Gavin went down on him again. With a strangled moan, Nines squeezed Gavin’s prosthetic and tugged on Gavin’s hair, sending tingles down Gavin’s nape, down Gavin’s back. Gavin wrapped his arm around Nines’ waist to hold him closer as he worked more of Nines into his mouth, more and more with each bob of his head.

Gavin could feel it, could feel Nines’ aching need, his desperation for release, his fervent _want._ Nines resisted fucking Gavin’s throat as much as he could—Gavin didn’t need to be connected to Nines to tell, Nines’ thighs tense and trembling under Gavin’s palm, Nines’ hand squeezed tight around Gavin’s prosthetic. And then Nines tugged hard on Gavin’s hair, urgency in the action, a distressed plea in his interface— All Gavin could do was moan around the flesh of Nines’ cock, Nines biting back a cry laced with static as he spilled into Gavin’s mouth.

Gavin pulled off with a hard gulp, coughing into his fist while heaving for air. “Thought you, ahem, uh, you had stami…na. Oh.”

With a nod, Nines wiped away the beads of tears at Gavin’s eyes, then lowered his hand to cup Gavin’s chin and brush away a trail of cum that had spilled from Gavin’s lips. Nines’ hard cock hadn’t flagged in the slightest. “Yes. ‘Oh.’” He ran his thumb across Gavin’s cheek and urged him up, then bent down to press a soft kiss to Gavin’s lips.

As Nines tried to pull back, Gavin chased those lips and clambered onto Nines’ lap, then laid on Nines’ chest as he leaned back onto the bed. Gavin ran his hands down Nines’ sides before bringing them to his pants, shifting and rolling his hips against Nines to get the restricting clothing off his damn legs.

“Gavin,” Nines growled, and a shudder shot down Gavin’s spine, even as a sly smirk formed on his lips. “You’re an ass.”

“Guess it goes both ways, then,” Gavin croaked, grin not faltering. He coughed into his fist, not missing Nines’ quiet hiss at the sound of his voice, throat fucked just enough to be raw. Gavin kicked off his pants and boxers with a shaky sigh, then sat up and splayed his prosthetic’s fingers across Nines’ chest, it hitching on an inhale, his hand pressing against Nines’ lips. “Now’s the time to help me make good on what you said, Nines.”

For some reason, Nines gulped. Hard. He parted his lips and took Gavin’s fingers in his mouth, lapping around them, making sure they were wet enough for Gavin’s use. When Gavin pulled his fingers away, Nines said, soft and breathy, “I’m glad my state-of-the-art analysis fluid can help you in your sexual exploits.”

Gavin choked back a bark of a laugh. “You need to shut the fuck up right now. I don’t think I can do this if you’re gonna be such a fucking dumbass.”

“I’m sure you’d find a way.”

Gavin did his best to bite back a squeak. He smacked Nines’ chest, drawing a rumbling chuckle from Nines’ lips. “Shut the hell up! God.” He heaved a sigh and bit his lip as he brought his hand behind him, squeezing his eyes shut as he pressed a finger into himself. With a gasp that hitched tight in his throat, Gavin shuddered, body flinching as he pushed his finger as far deep as it could go. “ _Oh…._ Fuck. Haha.”

Nines ran his hands over Gavin’s arms and legs, doing his best to soothe Gavin’s shaking. His gaze lingered on Gavin’s face, awe and satisfaction flashing within those gunmetal eyes. “Take your time, Gav, you’re being so good for me.” He squeezed Gavin’s thighs, drawing a whine from Gavin’s throat. “Do it at your own pace. I know you haven’t…well, done this in a while.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I….” Gavin grit his teeth and laid himself on Nines’ chest, burying his face against Nines’ throat. “Ah, ah, Nines, fuck….” After a few more moments of hissing and squirming and swearing, Gavin worked in a second finger with a tight groan.

Nines brushed his hands down Gavin’s back, his nails dragging against Gavin’s heated skin. “You’re doing so well, Gavin.” He kissed Gavin’s temple and exhaled a shaky breath. “It’s taking so much out of me to not flip you around and fuck you right now.” Gavin’s breath caught in his throat alongside a whining sob. “You’re so good, you’re doing _so_ well, Gavin.”

With a wet gasp, Gavin exhaled a hot breath against Nines’ skin. “Sh-shut up, oh my fucking god….” But he twitched and groaned at the praise, each new gasp that spilled from his lips less tense, less pained, more satisfied, more needy. Desperate. Itching for more. Longing for it.

Nines pressed a kiss to Gavin’s ear, whispering, “Does it feel good? Fucking yourself on your fingers after so long?” Heat squeezed around Gavin’s waist, Gavin’s breath catching in his throat. Nines continued on, scraping his nails over Gavin’s flesh and tearing a squeak of a moan from Gavin’s throat. “Would you be content just doing this, rutting against my waist, bucking back against your fingers, to get yourself off?”

“I’m not—!” But Gavin stilled his hips and panted for air, unable to deny what Nines had said. He growled, weak as it was, and pulled his fingers from himself, leaning back to take Nines’ cock in hand, pumping it to get it slick from residual analysis fluid. “Are you ready to fuck me or not?”

Nines purred and rubbed Gavin’s thighs, drawing his hands up to Gavin’s waist. “Very much so.” His thumbs massaged small circles against Gavin’s stomach, and he gazed up at Gavin with such adoration and patience that Gavin’s chest filled to the brim with warmth. “I can’t wait to fill you up, right here.” He pressed his thumbs hard against Gavin’s gut, Gavin’s breath hitching in his throat. “And just know that the second you start to set your own pace on my cock, I’m going to shove you down onto this bed and make you mine.”

Gavin overflowed. He squirmed under Nines’ gaze, Nines’ touch, his bottom lip stuck between his grit teeth. “R-right,” was all he could think to say, his heart pounding in his throat as those words echoed in his head. Gavin rose up onto his knees and lowered, gasping as he sank onto Nines’ cock. He let out a sharp hiss, his prosthetic grasping for Nines’ hand, his anchor, as he urged himself lower, lower, lower….

“You’re perfect,” Nines breathed between panting moans, kneading his fingers against Gavin’s sides. He shuddered when a wet gasp spilled from Gavin’s lips. “So beautiful. You’re so, so precious to me, Gavin.”

“Mmn-hmm, I—” Gavin bit back a cry, heaving for air as he sat flush to Nines’ lap, Nines’ cock scorching hot inside him. “ _Oh…._ You feel so good,” Gavin groaned out, hand shaking as it clutched Nines’ thigh, prosthetic trembling against Nines’ intertwined fingers. “Holy fuck, Nines, Nines, I….” He drew in a deep gulp of air, his head lolling to the side as he tested a roll of his hips, moaning, sharp and low, as Nines moved inside him. “Oh, _fuck,_ you feel so good.”

With a purr, Nines drew Gavin’s prosthetic to his lips and kissed the knuckles. “That’s good to hear.” He brought Gavin’s prosthetic to cup his cheek, the skin along his jaw retracting, feeding Nines Gavin’s every emotion, every thought, while Nines fed Gavin answers to the pleas Gavin wouldn’t say aloud.

_01011001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100001 01110101 01110100 01101001 01100110 01110101 01101100 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110011 01100011 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101101 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01110101 01101001 01101110 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101_

Gavin wailed as Nines rolled his hips, Gavin a mess at the small motions, at Nines’ fucking binary. He whimpered as he lifted himself up, crying out as he fell back down. Every part of his body pulsed with heat, his vision cluttered with ones and zeroes. “Nines, _fuck,_ oh—” He tipped his head back, his brow furrowed in concentration as he drew himself back up once more, then grit his teeth with a wet gasp at the fall back down.

When Gavin raised himself up again, Nines wrapped his arm around Gavin’s back and flipped them around in one smooth motion only an android would be able to perform. Gavin fell back onto his mattress with a gasp, then Nines ripped a cry from Gavin’s throat as he slammed back into Gavin, one of his hands holding Gavin’s prosthetic beside Gavin’s head, his other wrapped around one of Gavin’s thighs, keeping it close around his waist.

“Was that alright?” he whispered, oh so soft compared to Gavin’s needy whines and whimpers and affirmations. Nines trailed kisses along Gavin’s jaw, up to Gavin’s ear, and drew his hips back slow before snapping forward, flush against Gavin once more. Gavin let out a wail, hand scrabbling for purchase around Nines’ shoulders. “God, Gavin, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” Nines pressed his lips to Gavin’s, moans flitting between them, muffled between their lips.

Gavin gulped down air between wet kisses, coherent words long since discarded in favor of succumbing to the pleasure. Nines fucked him slow, each movement drawn out, out, until the moment Nines thrust back into him. Gavin wailed, fumbling for speech, fumbling for a hold on Nines’ shoulders, Gavin’s hand pressed flat against Nines’ flesh to feel the movement of his body, feel the way Nines’ shoulder blades shifted as he drew back, tensed as he—

Gavin _screamed,_ pitiful moans his every exhale. “Nines,” he choked out, head thrown back against the mattress, his chest heaving, desperate for air, desperate to even out his rapid breathing. “ _Nines,_ oh fuck, please, _please,_ I—”

For a moment, Gavin thought he stopped breathing, Nines’ long fingers curled tight around his dick, pumping slow, so slow, too slow— Gavin groaned, a hiccup caught in his throat as tears threatened to spill down his cheeks. He dragged his hand down Nines’ chest and arched his back off the bed with a sharp whine. “Nines, fucking please, _harder,_ more, more, _please—!_ ”

Nines’ next thrust ripped another ragged scream from Gavin’s throat. “So fucking good for me,” Nines panted out, burying his face against Gavin’s neck. “Gavin, I….” He huffed, rapid breaths hot against Gavin’s skin. Nines wrapped his arm around Gavin’s back, drawing him closer, his other hand picking up its pace on Gavin’s cock.

And when Nines dug his teeth against the flesh of Gavin’s throat, Gavin came undone. He came with a silent cry, lips parted wide, body drawn oh so taut before bliss weighed heavy like lead in his limbs. Nines released his hold on Gavin’s cock with a groan, then pulled out and wrapped his hand around himself, kissing down Gavin’s neck as he thrust into his fist. Gavin groaned and wrapped his arm around Nines’ neck, his prosthetic reaching down to thumb the head of Nines’ cock. With another thrust, Nines came with a husky snarl laced with static, the sound shooting a hard shudder down Gavin’s spine.

Then, the world was quiet. Gavin drew in slow, deep gulps of air, Nines’ internal fans whirring with a low hum in his chassis. Gavin gulped, then muttered, weak, “When I look down, I better not see you still hard.”

Nines let out a gentle laugh and kissed Gavin’s cheek. “I won’t be.” He shifted and laid next to Gavin, drawing him into his embrace with a kiss on the top of Gavin’s head. “Rest now. I’ll—”

“No,” Gavin cut in, tightening his hold around Nines as poison pooled deep within Gavin’s chest. “Don’t…don’t go anywhere. I’m fine.”

“Gavin….” Nines brushed his hand over Gavin’s hair, the frown in his tone causing Gavin to curl up and bury his face against Nines’ chest in uneasy silence. “Can I clean you up, Sparky? I’ll come back right away, I swear.”

Gavin shook his head, hiding his face, hiding his tears. “Please don’t,” he breathed. “Nines, I…I really don’t want you to go.”

Nines pressed his lips to the top of Gavin’s head and nodded. “I know, Sparky.”

Gavin’s breath hitched in his throat and he grit his teeth, even as his eyes burned, as he forced his shoulders into steadiness. “Please don’t go, Nines, I…I need you here, I need….”

“Shh, Gavin, it’s okay.” Nines rubbed down Gavin’s back. The darkness was colored vibrant crimson. “It’ll be okay. I’ll be okay.”

His words couldn’t force away the dread rooted deep in Gavin’s heart, couldn’t force the sobs in Gavin’s throat to dissipate. With shaky hands, Gavin clutched any part of Nines he could grasp, his prosthetic never too far from Nines’ chassis. It was all he could do as time marched onwards, until he had to return to an otherwise empty apartment, an otherwise routine life, a life before…. Before.

“Don’t do this to me,” Gavin said, softer than a whisper, as quiet as a thread of wind. “I’m so fucking scared, please don’t….”

Nines held Gavin close and kissed his head. “I….” He sighed, it sounding almost strained, tight, like his throat wasn’t working. Nines took Gavin’s prosthetic in his hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing each finger, each joint, each knuckle. _[I’ll miss you,]_ he sent, somber.

That night, Gavin cried himself to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im gavin


	21. Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because Nines would be alone, scared, helpless, and Gavin hated the thought of Nines feeling any of those things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit guys hahaha thanks for waiting! I'll have spring break soon so hopefully I'll be able to get another chapter out more quickly through all this school :') But!! I hope you enjoy this, I sure did lol

Awareness seeped into Gavin like a slow sip of whiskey, all full-body warmth and blissful burn. It weighed down his muscles and set heavy in his bones, and Gavin forced his eyes open even as his lashes clung to the dried tear tracks on his cheeks. Sourness prickled the back of Gavin’s throat. He didn’t drink whiskey to feel good.

He sat up slow, the blanket over his torso falling to his lap, Nines’ arm around his waist urging him close to his side. “I’m here,” Nines breathed, eyes closed, almost like he was still asleep. “I’m here, Sparky.” Gavin blinked away the bleariness from his eyes as he laid on Nines’ chest, his cheek against Nines’ heart, beating a steady one, two, three, one, two.

“I know,” Gavin murmured back after swallowing the lump in his throat, his voice dry, raspy. With a long, deep breath, Gavin ran his hands up and down Nines’ sides, dragging his knuckles against Nines’ ribs, over his waist. The musk of sex and sweat still laid thick in the air, lingering on Nines’ warm chest, alongside a hot scent that tingled the back of Gavin’s nose. Burnt plastic. Gavin couldn’t stop a light chuckle.

“What are you thinking about?” Nines threaded his fingers through Gavin’s unkempt hair, the smile in his tone pooling warmth in Gavin’s limbs.

Gavin rested his chin on Nines’ chest with a smile as he traced his fingertips over Nines’ arms. “You just smell burnt n’ shit.”

Nines let out a huff of a laugh. “You don’t smell any better, you know.” He curled his fingers against Gavin’s cheek, these quiet moments keeping away any worries or problems of the outside, their world just this apartment, this room, this bed.

If only. Gavin clenched his hands and turned his head to the side. “How…long was I asleep?”

“Nine hours, more or less.” Nines brushed a stray strand of hair from Gavin’s forehead. “I didn’t want to move in case I startled you awake; you looked so…peaceful.” With a tilt of his head, he added, “How are you feeling?”

Gavin let his eyes slip shut with his exhale. “I…I’m feeling good, actually. Really good? But….” He wet his lips, the dry skin clinging to the near-nonexistent moisture of Gavin’s tongue, his eyes prickling with a burning need to shed tears his body didn’t have. “I just— Thank you. Really, Nines. I…I just need….”

“Water?” Nines ran his thumb across Gavin’s cheek. “Will you allow me to get up to get some for you?”

A spike of fear trickled down Gavin’s spine, and he reached out with a trembling hand to cup Nines’ cheek. “Um. Can I, uh, come with?”

Nines smiled and nodded. “I don’t see why not. Can you stand?”

“Uh….” Gavin chewed his lip, hefting himself off Nines’ chest to sit on the edge of the bed. With a soft hiss, he drew his hand to rub his lower back, breathing out a, “Fuck,” as he put pressure on the muscles.

“Are you alright?” Nines shifted closer and placed his hands on Gavin’s back, resting his chin on Gavin’s shoulder as he pressed his fingers against the sore flesh, massaging the aches away. “I shouldn’t have gone so hard….”

Gavin fumbled for a response, letting out a huff of an exhale as he leaned into Nines’ touch with a shake of his head. “Listen, I…well, I, uh, asked for it.” He frowned for a moment, the expression combating Nines’ pleasant touch. “I’m fine, really.”

Nines breathed a soft, “Okay.” and reached for the blanket, wrapping it around Gavin’s shoulders before getting up from the bed and hefting Gavin into his arms.

“Hey—” Gavin couldn’t say he struggled in the embrace, his protest lasting less than a second before he leaned into it, his palm against Nines’ thirium pump, beating gentle and slow. “I can walk, Nines.”

The chuckle from Nines’ chest rumbled and vibrated against Gavin’s tender skin. “Let me take care of you, Sparky. It’s the least I could do.”

Though words gathered on Gavin’s tongue, none of them made a move to leave his mouth. So, he gave in with a small nod.

Nines carried him to the bathroom first, the blinding light searing across Gavin’s sensitive eyes. As Nines set him down on the closed toilet seat, Gavin fumbled to keep ahold of Nines’ arms, but when Nines left him to turn on the shower, Gavin forced his eyes open with a whine. The hiss of water filled the room with the shriek of the shower knobs before Nines reached out to test the water’s temperature.

“You don’t…have to do this,” Gavin said, drawing the blanket tighter around himself with a frown at the tile floor. Nines didn’t have to do any of this: clean him up, hydrate him. Any of this.

Nines glanced back as he pulled his hand out from under the steady stream of water. “You know I want to.” He smiled, the blue of his scar far, far too bright against his pale skin. “I….” He glanced to the side and rested his palms on Gavin’s thighs, smoothing the blanket over Gavin’s legs. “Just…let me do what I can for you, alright?”

Gavin nodded, dry tears again prickling in his eyes. “Why…are you like this?”

“Sparky….” Nines leaned forward to kiss Gavin’s cheek, then wrapped his arms around Gavin’s waist. He pulled back, flicking his gaze between Gavin’s, and said, “Because of you, Gavin. I’m like this because of you.”

Gavin swallowed, thick and tight, as he buried his face against Nines’ shoulder and drew in slow, deep breaths, his words softer than a whisper. “Just…how? I don’t get it, I’m a fucking _asshole,_ I….”

“You aren’t,” Nines breathed. He drew his hands to cup Gavin’s cheeks, pulling him back to meet his gaze, keeping him from looking away. Nines’ LED spun a dark crimson, his eyes steady, determined, almost. “You aren’t,” he repeated. “You’re far more than that, Gavin. You’re so much more. You….” Nines wet his lips for a reason unknown, his eyes fluttering closed as he leaned his forehead against Gavin’s. “You’re so much more than you believe.”

And Gavin broke. He set his jaw, gulping down a sob as he went to wipe his eyes, puffy and red and everything Nines seemed to adore. “God, fuck you.” But he didn’t mean it, he never did, and he grasped onto Nines’ arms with a sniff, letting his eyes slip shut as he leaned into Nines’ touch, soothing, comforting, home. “I…. Jeez, how’d an ass like me get someone like you?” Nines ran his fingers along Gavin’s jaw, soothing the tense muscles, the strain on Gavin’s bone. “Guess that’s why you’re….” He couldn’t continue, the word lodged in his throat, the reminder of coming home tomorrow to an empty bed forcing what little water he had left in his body to roll down his cheeks.

“You know I don’t want to leave,” Nines said to fill the silence that threatened to consume Gavin whole. Nines wiped the tears from Gavin’s cheeks. “Please tell me you know that, at least. You’ve…shown me so much of what it’s like to be alive, Gavin, and I’d stay by your side…forever, if I could.”

Gavin choked on his sob and closed the gap between them with a wet kiss, his breaths consumed by whimpers, his body shaking to keep quiet. Nines brought him through it, through this despair that pushed and pulled at him, threatening to tear him apart. Nines parted from Gavin’s lips, almost cautious, and pushed the blanket off Gavin’s shoulders, helping him stand before leading him into the shower.

“It’ll be fine, Sparky,” Nines mumbled against Gavin’s ear, reaching for the shampoo from its little metal stand and pouring a good amount on Gavin’s head. Nines held Gavin close as he massaged Gavin’s scalp and breathed nonsense words to Gavin, all soothing, all words Gavin couldn’t comprehend. The constant stream of heated water numbed his thoughts, a slight reprieve from the inevitable future.

Nines lowered his hand over the expanse of Gavin’s back, tracing his fingertips over the angry red marks he’d left behind hours prior. The touch sent a shiver down Gavin’s spine, but he didn’t say a word, giving himself the gift of a thoughtless mind, his body succumbing to whatever Nines decided to do. Each of Nines’ touches filled Gavin with comforting warmth, and the hand at his head washed the suds from his hair before taking the bar of soap from the metal stand and drawing it down Gavin’s torso. Soon enough, Nines finished washing the grime from Gavin’s body and pulled away, just for a moment, to snag a towel from the closet.

“I…know I shouldn’t say this,” Nines said as he turned off the water, sending the room into a deep silence that made Gavin’s heartbeat pound in his ears. “But….” He wrapped the towel around Gavin’s shoulders and rubbed the cloth over Gavin’s wet skin, taking care not to aggravate the bruises and scratch marks littered across his body.

“What?” Gavin tried not to snap as he shifted on his feet, a dull ache in his limbs. Now the burn in his muscles felt…nice, almost. Satisfying. Still, Nines had done a fucking number on him.

Nines let out a soft chuckle and kissed Gavin’s forehead, lifting the towel to ruffle up Gavin’s hair. With Gavin’s yelp, Nines cupped Gavin’s cheeks and gave him a warm smile. “It’s…satisfying, to take care of you. And I enjoy seeing the marks I’ve made on your skin.”

With a gulp and a too-trembling hand, Gavin trailed his fingers over the slope of Nines’ neck, over the back of Nines’ shoulder, where Gavin’s own nails should’ve made a mark. “You….” He couldn’t continue, emotions fluttering within his chest, clogging his throat, a war amongst embarrassment, worry, satisfaction, dread—

 _[I’ll miss you,]_ Gavin tested, hesitant, shy. Always shy.

He gasped as Nines’ fingers caught in his hair and pulled, forcing Gavin’s head back, forcing Gavin’s wide-eyed gaze to meet Nines’. Nines held enough radiance to drown in, his smile soothing the boiling poison in Gavin’s gut. “You’ve still got me for two more hours, Sparky. How would you like to make the most of them?”

The suggestion in Nines’ tone left nothing to question: an invitation, a promise, a hope. Gavin wet his lips, drew in a deep breath, and rose to press his lips to Nines’, gentle and soft and everything Gavin never was, everything Gavin had learned to be. Gavin wrapped his arms around Nines’ neck and broke the kiss with a soft sigh and a shake of his head. “Um, lemme help you get ready?” He swallowed the crack in his voice. “Please?”

“I’d like that,” Nines said with a smile, patting down Gavin’s torso with the towel before wrapping it around Gavin’s waist. Nines’ fingers lingered on the white cloth while his focus lingered on Gavin’s face. “Go get dressed while I grab your water, to start. I’d gotten…distracted.” His smile grew a fraction. “I apologize.”

Gavin let out a scoff and shoved Nines’ chest, his gaze catching on that jagged, deep blue scar. “Thanks,” he choked out, “for, uh, helping. It was…it was nice.” He motioned to Nines’ pants, large patches of the fabric soaked through with water. “I, um…. Sorry about that.”

“It’s alright.” Nines caught Gavin’s hands with a chuckle. “I’m glad you allowed me to clean you.”

Silence settled in the space between them, a silence that pulled Gavin’s attention once again to the blue on Nines’ chest, oh so bright, far too jarring. He just…he couldn’t look away, something sour seeping into his gut at the sight. Something like guilt. “Hey,” Nines murmured, bringing Gavin’s palms to his chest, letting Gavin trace the edges of the scar’s raised skin. “I’ll be fine. It’s winter; I won’t be taking my shirt off anytime soon.”

“Don’t scan me.” Gavin batted at Nines’ arms, his touch gentle. “I— I just want you to be careful, got it?”

Nines pressed a kiss to the palm of Gavin’s prosthetic, a small smile on his lips as he blinked slow butterfly kisses against the plastic, sending tingles up Gavin’s hand. “Understood. I wouldn’t do anything different, after all.” He straightened, running his thumb across Gavin’s prosthetic, sending a blossom of tranquility up the plastic nerves. “Now go on, Sparky, get ready. I’ll leave your water on the counter.”

With a nod, Gavin pulled away and lingered at the doorway, watching Nines head to the kitchen before he went into his room. Without the aid of Nines’ presence, the cold grip of fear tickled Gavin’s throat. But he gulped it down and did nothing. It was all in his head; Nines would never just…disappear.

Gavin shook those thoughts from his head as he shuffled into a clean pair of boxers and jeans, then threw on the first sweatshirt he grabbed from his closet. As he went to dash out of the room, something caught his eye, and he turned back to snag Nines’ turtleneck from the floor. Gavin frowned at the fabric before brushing it off and folding it, then heading out.

When he stepped out into the hallway, Jo let out a squeaky meow from the windowsill and leapt down to coil herself around Gavin’s legs. “You damn ass,” he muttered as he made his way to the kitchen, trying not to stumble over Jo’s little frame. A glass of ice water sat atop the counter next to the fridge, and Gavin grabbed the glass and brought it to his lips, the water cool and refreshing in his throat as he downed a few gulps.

He lifted Jo into his arms as he made his way back into the bathroom, bumping the door open with his hip. “Hey—” The words died on his tongue, withering and rotting away to leave nothing but rough, charred stems that scratched their way up Gavin’s throat.

Nines’ reflection blinked back at him, hair a blinding white, LED spinning yellow, the tip of a knife digging under the plastic of his temple. Under his LED. A long, long moment passed before Nines lowered the knife to the edge of the sink with a small, weak smile. “It’s alright,” he said, words almost too loud in the space around them. Nines turned to face Gavin, his smile softening with warmth. “You can stay, I don’t mind.”

“N-no, I, uh— It’s fine, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t— I shouldn’t, um….” What? Watch something so…so intimate? Something so meaningful Gavin couldn’t even begin to comprehend, couldn’t begin to pretend to understand?

But all Nines did was rest his palm on Gavin’s cheek and let his head tilt to the side, his gaze soft, open. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re okay. It’s up to you,” came his quiet reply, washing up against Gavin like gentle waves against sand.

And that water washed away Gavin’s resistance, eroded at Gavin’s rocky resolve, more and more with each second Nines held Gavin’s gaze. “Alright,” Gavin breathed, holding out Nines’ turtleneck to force himself to look away. “I’ll, um, I’ll stay.”

Nines took the turtleneck with a soft, “Thank you.” and pulled it over his head, hiding the blue of his scar from Gavin’s peripheral. Gavin gulped. Those simple words, that damned scar—they held so much weight, too much weight, enough to settle on Gavin’s lungs, forcing a breath to leave Gavin’s throat. Nines turned back toward the mirror without another word.

This…. What was it? Gavin wanted to bury his face against Jo’s fur, but he couldn’t tear his gaze from Nines’ reflection as Nines lifted the knife back to his temple and worked the blade into his skin. With a snap of his wrist, the LED fell into the sink with a ting, and Nines put down the knife once more as his skin reformed over the smooth plastic of his temple. He picked up his LED, examining it for a moment before looking back and holding it out to Gavin. “Hold onto it for me?” he asked, words soft, too soft.

The walls around them condensed, thickened, the muffled noises of the street outside long gone, the creak of floorboards from the floors above and below a faraway detail. Gavin adjusted Jo so he held her in the same arm as his cup, then took the tiny, glowing blue disc from Nines’ fingers. Gavin ran his thumb over the flat of it, watching it pulse under his touch. “Okay,” was all he could muster to say. He wasn’t sure what else he _could_ say. Thanks? Good luck? Come back home safe? The words caught in his throat and choked him up.

Gavin slipped the LED into his pocket and, instead of letting these feelings fester in his thoughts, in his blood, Gavin shoved them aside like they didn’t exist in the first place. “What’s, uh, up with your hair, huh?”

Nines raised his hand to the side of his head with a small smile on his face, his fingertips running along the white strands of hair. “Though it’s not the best disguise, it’s off-putting nonetheless. It’s just a precaution.”

“It’s, uh.” Gavin gulped. “It’s good. Like, um, you just look good— I mean, it’s _definitely_ a shit disguise, but, um—”

With a laugh, Nines reached out to scratch Jo’s jaw, Jo arching toward the attention. “Thank you, Sparky. I’m glad you find it…endearing.” He leaned forward to press a kiss to Gavin’s head, then drew back to say, “Come on, now. Would you like to accompany me to the station?”

Gavin rubbed his eyes with a nod, then trailed after Nines as Nines led him to the door. Nines reached for Gavin’s coat as Gavin let Jo leap from his arms and pad over to curl beneath the coffee table, her little orange tail curling around her paws, tucked tight under her chest. At least that drew up the edges of Gavin’s lips, despite everything.

“Here,” Nines said, holding Gavin’s coat to his back while Gavin slipped his arms into the sleeves. “Ready?”

Gavin ran his fingers through his hair to clean up some of his lingering bedhead. “Yeah,” he breathed. “What about you? You’re leaving your jacket?”

Nines nodded as he opened the apartment door. “You’d make better use of it than my locker at the DPD will.”

“Oh. Uh, yeah. Right.” Gavin gulped as he followed Nines out of the apartment, Nines locking the door after them and pocketing his key. Gavin lingered close, just enough for his fingers to brush against Nines’ sleeve. “Um, thank you.”

Nines glanced to him with a raised brow, surprise flitting across his face. “What makes you say that?”

“Just….” Gavin huffed, giving in and taking Nines’ hand as they began their descent down the stairs. “For…everything. And really, everything. Alright?”

Nines could only smile. “Of course.” He ran his thumb along Gavin’s hand, then when they got to the bottom of the stairs, he flicked his gaze to the side at the faux potted plant next to the call box, kept there to brighten up the entryway. “I’ll miss this place,” he whispered as he brushed his free hand along the plant’s plastic leaves.

Gavin stuffed his prosthetic in his pocket and ran his finger along the flat of Nines’ LED, imagining it cycling yellow where it should be on Nines’ temple.

Their cab was quiet. Gavin leaned against Nines’ side with his eyes half closed, Nines’ arm around his waist, his other hand intertwined with Gavin’s prosthetic. Yeah, sure, this was dangerous, but…Nines was strong. And like he’d said, if it wasn’t dangerous, there wouldn’t be crime in the first place. So Gavin just had to trust Nines knew what he was doing, knew his limits. Still, his nerves churned within his gut, around and around and around, and Gavin didn’t even understand why—

No. He knew why. Because he wouldn’t be there to watch Nines’ back. Because he wouldn’t be there to notice things Nines couldn’t, as advanced of an android as he was. Because Nines would be alone, scared, helpless, and Gavin hated the thought of Nines feeling any of those things.

Not that Gavin had much choice in the matter.

They slowed as they came up to the DPD, the building almost surreal at this hour. The darkness of the sky above fought with the yellow light of the street lamps and windows for territory on the snowy walkways and buildings, salt and footprints littered on the sidewalk.

Gavin stepped out onto the edge of the walkway, Nines following after. Gavin parted his lips, his gaze locked on a wrinkle in Nines’ shirt, but no words left him; none that would be worth saying, at least.

Nines stepped forward, closing the gap between them with a tight embrace as he buried his face against Gavin’s shoulder. “I’ll miss you.”

Gavin couldn’t cry.

“Me too,” Gavin said, shoving the words past his lips with a too-dry tongue. “I swear to God, Nines, be careful.”

With a soft chuckle, Nines nodded and turned his head to kiss Gavin’s neck. “I will. I’ll see you soon, Sparky.”

Gavin couldn’t cry.

“Yeah.” Gavin nodded back, tilting his head to rest it against Nines’, even as his throat _burned,_ a sob trying to claw its way through the bars of Gavin’s tight throat. “I’ll, um, I’ll see you later, tin can.”

Gavin clung to Nines’ sleeves as Nines drew back with a melancholic smile. It didn’t fit Nines’ face at all, not at all, and Gavin forced down a thick gulp at the sight. “Gavin, I….” Gavin reached up and cupped Nines’ cheek, then drew his hand up higher to run his thumb over Nines’ temple. If he still had his LED, Gavin had no doubt that it’d be spinning red. Nines’ smile only grew more pained, and he heaved a strained sigh as he took Gavin’s hands in his and squeezed them. “I’ll see you later.” One last squeeze, and Nines started to step back—

Gavin grappled for Nines’ collar and tugged him down, the two stumbling as Gavin pressed their lips together. “Fucker,” Gavin muttered between desperate kisses, reaching his hands up to thread through Nines’ hair as Nines overcame his shock and wrapped his arms tight around Gavin’s waist. They parted with a gasp, their warmth mingling between them to combat Detroit’s cold. “Fuckin’ about to leave without even….”

Nines let out a laugh, silly and bright, as he cupped Gavin’s cheeks and kissed Gavin’s nose. “Oh, Gavin, you’re so adorable.”

Fuck, Gavin couldn’t cry.

“Shut it and go meet up with Fowler, you ass.” This time Gavin drew back first, unsure that if he stayed any longer he’d be able to ever let go. He gulped, words thick and wet. “He’s gonna be pissy if you make him stay up any later.”

With a nod, Nines hesitated, lips parted, melancholy laced in every part of his expression. “I hope you and Tina have fun. Tell me all about it when I get back, alright?” His smile grew, warmth almost…hiding something like regret. “I’ll be back before you know it, Gavin.” And with that, Nines turned and headed into the station, and Gavin slipped back into the cab and directed it to his apartment.

 _Fuck,_ Gavin couldn’t cry, he couldn’t, he couldn’t— But tears found their way down his cheeks anyhow, and he curled up against the door with his head in his hands, wiping away the wetness from his face that just kept coming back, over and over. The lights that flashed past the cab’s window were a blur, his chest heaving to not make a sound, to try and convince himself these tears were worthless, unneeded, idiotic. His body didn’t listen. Not until the cab slowed to a stop, not until he had no tears left to shed.

Gavin drew in a deep, deep breath. He looked up at his apartment complex, something…off about it, now that…now that he had no one to return home to. He supposed he’d have Tina soon, but…. Maybe he could try to sleep until Tina came by, and then all this emptiness wouldn’t hurt as much.

Gavin sat inside the cab for a moment, quiet, before wiping away the wetness on his face with his sleeve. And when Gavin opened the cab’s door, he left his sorrow behind. He could worry tomorrow when Nines sent his first message to Connor—when Nines learned the level of danger he was in.

The little noises around Gavin were far too loud, even his own breathing an annoyance in his ears as he made his way into the building. He could only sigh at the creak of the floorboards in front of his door before unlocking it and swinging it open.

“Oh. I didn’t expect you’d be back so soon.”

Habit curled Gavin’s hands into fists, his blood pounding in his ears as he snapped his head up and toward the window, toward an oh-so-familiar voice with a flinch. Gavin couldn’t look away, his heartbeat deafening in the surrounding silence. Elijah stared back, a small smile on his face as he twirled an immaculate silver key in his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feel free to yell at me in the comments


	22. No Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It sparked beneath his fingertips: knowledge.
> 
> Understanding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wOOOOOO first off this took way too long but hey!! School will get out soon so then maybe I'll have more time on my hands XD Thanks for waiting, I'm super excited for these future chapters!! 
> 
> AND BY THE WAY THANKS FOR 11K HITS JFISUHJALS:KFHDSGKL I'm beyond overjoyed to see so many people look into this little story of mine,,,, I wanted to post this chapter when we hit 10k but I missed it XD Aaaaaa thank you guys so much!! It's so much fun writing for you all and boy am I planning to do a whole lot more lmao
> 
> Anyway!!! I think that's enough from me lol, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Time stopped. Nothing mattered anymore,  _ nothing, _ nothing save for the wrath that tore apart Gavin’s shock. 

“Where the hell did you get that?” Gavin couldn’t move, not yet, his numb limbs disconnected from his brain while his tongue choked out words through his tight throat. “What the  _ fuck _ are you doing here?”

Elijah stepped away from the window with a slow, effortless grace that almost made Gavin sick, his walk practiced, refined after years of public appearances. “I understand this isn’t the best timing, but—”

“ _ No, _ ” Gavin snapped. “Shut it. Don’t you dare say a  _ fucking _ word. Just— Just get the  _ hell _ out.” His feet moved on their own, taking slow, unsteady steps up to Elijah. Gavin didn’t meet his gaze; he couldn’t, his vision swamped in piercing crimson, heated anger throbbing at his temples. It took a deep breath and far too much willpower to unclench his fist and hold it out, palm up. “Give me back my key.” 

At that, Elijah moved his arm away from Gavin’s reach. “Hear me out first.”

Gavin set his jaw, the harsh scrape of his teeth flaring up the bubbling in his veins. He lunged forward and grappled for Elijah’s collar, the two of them stumbling as Gavin shoved Elijah against the nearest wall, Gavin ignoring the spike of pain in his muscles at the strain. “What makes you think I have  _ any _ reason to listen to you at all? You fucking  _ prick! _ ” 

There was something about Elijah’s expression—neutral, almost emotionless—that made Gavin’s stomach churn, made searing rage shoot against his skull. Even in such personal confrontation, the first thing Elijah did was make sure he was never the one to lose composure. If someone let emotions rule over logic, they’d fight a battle already lost.

Bullshit.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” Gavin scoured for anything in Elijah’s eyes, anything behind the wall he was always so quick to put up. “You think you can just fucking walk into my apartment like some fucking—some fucking suave asshole?” He wrenched Elijah forward and slammed him back against the wall with a snarl. “Why  _ now, _ huh? Do you fucking pity me? Is that it?” 

“Please, Ga—” 

“You don’t get to say my name!” The words caught in his throat and shredded on the thick sob he forced back. Gavin moved to tug Elijah forward once more, but flinched away with a pained gasp as fire seared down his arms, his healing wounds protesting the tautness of his muscles and the levels of adrenaline and anger in his blood. Gavin stumbled back with a sharp, ragged inhale, stumbled until he hit the side of his couch. He stood, dazed, holding his arms close to his chest as black spots speckled over his vision, white noise in his ears. “You don’t get to say my name,” he breathed, digging his thumbs into the flesh of his biceps, biting hard on the inside of his cheek, trying to move his pain elsewhere. 

“Please, hear me out.” Elijah stepped away from the wall and fixed his clothes, then drew in a slow breath. “You must know that the DPD wasn’t there when you woke, as well. You can’t blame me for keeping my distance during your initial time of recovery when everyone else did the same.”

Gavin couldn’t help a scoff. “I never took you as someone who follows others’ examples.”

Elijah frowned. “I know.” A long moment passed, Gavin trembling too much to move. He tasted blood. “I see you’re doing well, at least.” Elijah let out a dry, weak laugh as he brushed down his jacket. “You’re not one for letting unfortunate things keep you down.”

“Is that all you have to say to me?” Gavin grit his teeth. “You don’t bother sending even a fucking email—”

“You think I hadn’t thought to? Come on, Gavin, you know yourself better than that.” Elijah took slow steps around the couch, forcing attention on himself, commanding the room. Gavin was insignificant. A speck on something much grander, just something to be wiped away, brushed into the trash. “You wouldn’t have even opened anything I sent,” Elijah continued, “not to mention refuse anything I might’ve gifted. Do  _ not _ blame me for reaching out like this when you  _ never _ would.” 

Gavin gulped down his words and the blood on his tongue, unable to lift his eyes from the scuffed-up tips of his shoes. Insignificant. 

Elijah stopped and let out a heavy sigh. “This isn’t why I came here, I….”

“Then why  _ did _ you come here, Elijah?” Gavin clutched the cloth of his sleeves, begging himself not to be so fucking pathetic as to  _ cry. _ Not again. With all the steadiness in his voice he could muster, he said, “Just…just get out. I won’t say it again.” He pried his hand off his arm and reached out, and this time, Elijah placed Nines’ key in his palm without a hassle.

“I wanted to see you,” Elijah murmured. Gavin didn’t say a word. A small victory. “See how you were doing with your…situation.”

Gavin set his jaw and tried to bury the adrenaline clogging his veins. “Well? Haven’t you seen enough, dipshit?” 

He hated how the words forced their way from his lips, laden with the weight of a choked-up sob.

Elijah looked him over with crossed arms; fuckin’ pretentious prick. “You should sleep,” he said, a trickle of his own exhaustion slipping through the cracks of his wall. “It’s late.”

“No fucking kidding,” Gavin spat. 

Elijah parted his lips, but sighed and, finally, took the first step toward the door, Gavin trailing behind. When Elijah reached for the knob, he hesitated, the gears in that head of his spinning and spinning with possible choices he could make. Elijah thought too much like an android for his own good.

“Well?” All the patience Gavin had somehow collected snapped, his exhaustion egging on his hate, his anger, his distress. “Is the knob too  _ dirty _ for you? Too below your fuckin’ pristine standards?”

“Where do you think you got that prosthesis, Gavin?”

Time stopped. Something stuttered, halted, lagged behind in Gavin’s head. The silence seeped into his skin and poisoned his body, frigid cold under his flesh. It sparked beneath his fingertips: knowledge.

Understanding.

Gavin curled his hands into fists and Nines’ key dug into the flesh of his palm, the sparks condensing, the connection between his metal plate and bicep prickling at the reminder he was missing a part of himself, a part he’d never get back. And he’d replaced it with—with one of Elijah’s fucking trinkets. 

“It wasn’t my forté,” Elijah continued without turning around. “Finding a connection between flesh and plastic, I mean. Everything else was a matter of measurement and precision.” He glanced back, his eyes holding a fatigue and…an uncharacteristic aimlessness that he’d never show on a screen. “I’m glad it’s working for you.”

With that, he took hold of the knob and turned it, swinging the door open to step out of the apartment and head down the hall. 

Something stuttered, halted, constricted in Gavin’s chest. It caught on his tongue, the word right there,  _ right _ there, but something stopped it from slipping out. Elijah was just being the bitchy, stuck-up rich kid he’d always been. He’d had his chance to check on Gavin weeks earlier to see if he was fucking okay. To  _ try _ and make an effort like a  _ normal _ fucking person, even if Gavin wouldn’t have—

The walls and doors of the hallway rushed past him anyhow, his feet thudding against the hard wood floor, a wheeze tearing itself from his lungs when he collided against the end of the hall and whipped his head to the side to look down the stairs. “Elijah,” Gavin rasped, catching Elijah just as he pushed through the entryway. Fire licked around Gavin’s throat, up his cheeks, around his limbs, his words halting and starting and on and on and—

He couldn’t do it. He…he couldn’t do it, his vision shimmering at the edges, his legs buckling underneath himself. Insignificant. “How did you get his key?” The plea hung in the air as cool, thin tears rolled down Gavin’s face and dripped off his chin. “How did you get it?”

Elijah stood, frozen, before glancing back with a small smile. “I’ll tell you tomorrow, Gav.”

This time, Gavin let him go, the door clicking shut with a final gust of chilly air. He’d left like a phantom, and as Gavin drew himself to his feet, wiped his face, and lumbered back to his apartment, he almost convinced himself Elijah had been just that: a hallucination. 

Oh, if only.

Gavin stumbled into his apartment and shut the door behind him a bit harder than he’d meant to, jumping at the slam that shot a tremor down his spine. Adrenaline ran rampant throughout his body, icy sweat rolling down his torso, his hand trembling at his side. 

Almost like habit, Gavin pulled Nines’ jacket from its place on the back of the door and slipped it on over the layers he already wore. He buried his face in the sleeve, drew in a deep, deep breath, and let the familiar scent soothe his pulsing nerves. 

And then, he went to grab his recorder. 

Gavin paced around his apartment for hours as he talked about anything and everything, about nothing, about work and his prosthetic and the pain that crept up on him at Elijah’s reminder and—

How had it taken him this long to disengage that fucking thing? Gavin threw the hunk of plastic onto his couch and held Nines’ jacket tighter around himself, let it calm his pounding heartbeat and the ache in his stump. 

The next words he forced out burned on their way up. “Why did I run after him?” Gavin’s fingers ached from their rigid grip on the recorder, but he didn’t allow himself to loosen his hold. “He’s done  _ nothing _ for me, I….” No. That couldn’t be further from the truth. 

Gavin slumped to the floor and placed the recorder down to swipe his fingers over the plate on his stump. 

_ RIGHT ARM _

_ Connection: 100% _

_ Strain: 0% _

_ Damage: 0% _

_ Remove plate? [ _ **_Yes_ ** _ /No] _

The plate fell to the floor with a clatter and Gavin drew his knees to his chest, resting his forehead on the peak. As he wrapped his arm around himself and rubbed his stump, he said, monotone, unsurprised; empty, almost, “Should’ve expected this. Should’ve fucking expected this bullshit….” A sob caught in his throat. Not again. He couldn’t fucking cry  _ again. _

With a sniff, Gavin raised his eyes to stare at the ceiling as he willed his emotions back to their graves. All the words he’d said coalesced around him, thick and heavy at his feet, their freedom his chains. “Today’s…really been all over the place, huh.” Weariness weighed down his eyelids, his shoulders, his chest. Gavin sank onto his side, the floor cool against his cheek as he hugged Nines’ jacket close. “Nines’ll get t’ do what he was made for,” he mumbled, that realization settling some of the worries that flew, unbidden, back and forth within his head. Nines had been made for this type of stuff.

And Gavin would have to relearn how to take care of himself.

He fumbled to turn off the recorder and curled in on himself to conserve heat, his layers having no trouble doing so. Though the wood was stiff and his shoulder dug against his jaw, he couldn’t find the strength or the willpower to stand. Exhaustion pulled him into a fitful sleep.

What seemed like moments later, Gavin jerked awake at the banging on his door, his breath catching in his throat as he gained his bearings. “Comin’!” he slurred, peeling his skin off the floor and forcing himself up on numb limbs. Gavin stumbled to the door and fumbled with the lock before wrenching it open. 

Tina met him with a tight-lipped frown. “Oh, shit. You look awful.”

“Nice t’ see you too, Tina,” Gavin forced out with a huff. He stepped back to let her in, her arms laden with a stuffed backpack and a pillow.

“Jeez, what’ve you been doing all morning—?” Tina exhaled a long, sharp breath, her gaze catching on the parts of Gavin’s prosthesis scattered about the place, on the white jacket he wore. “Shit, Gav. Got anything you wanna talk about?”

Gavin waved her off and rushed to move his prosthetic off the cushions and set it on the coffee table. “You can, uh, put your stuff here.” He snatched up his plate from the floor as well, placing it beside the arm. “I, uh, kinda just woke up, so—”

“You  _ just _ woke up? Damn.” Tina batted her hand at him and set her stuff on the couch. “Go on, get ready, then. I don’t need your morning breath around me.”

That drew a weak chuckle from Gavin’s lips. “Alright, jeez. Fuck off.” He lumbered to the bathroom and went to brush his teeth, taking a moment to look at himself in the mirror. Dark circles under his eyes. Mussed-up hair. Disheveled clothes. 

Tina was right. He  _ did _ look like shit. Gavin spat into the sink and splashed some water on his face, then placed his toothbrush back in its holder. As he wiped off his face—with a towel, not a sleeve; he couldn’t dirty Nines’ jacket  _ already _ —Tina came in with more goodies and placed a plastic baggie holding her toothbrush and toothpaste on the edge of the sink. 

“You really came prepared,” Gavin said as he ran his fingers through his stiff hair. “How long did you plan on staying? The whole week?”

“Only if you want me to.” Tina opened the cabinet behind the mirror and stuffed a compact makeup bag beside Gavin’s over-the-counter medicines. “But I’m not sure if I’ll be able to, like, y’know, be glued to you this whole time. I wasn’t able to take off some night shifts, and of course I have Mia, so you’re on your own then.”

Gavin let out a laugh that eased the tension around his lungs and heart. “Yeah, yeah. Still…thanks.” A moment passed, thoughts that held no value running circles in his head. He straightened and stared at the sink’s drain, his hand finding its way into his jacket’s pocket to run his thumb over Nines’ LED. “I’m…just really glad you’re here to help me at all.”

“Hey now, where’s the little ass I know and love?” Tina squeezed Gavin’s cheek between her thumb and forefinger, a wicked grin on her face. “Who are you and what have you done to Gavin?”

A laugh bubbled up from Gavin’s throat as he batted Tina’s hand away. “Oh my God, you’re such a prick!”

Tina elbowed his side with a snort, then rested her arm on his shoulder. She let them linger in silence, something like…relief flashing behind her eyes, before she said, “I’m actually starving.”

“Jesus  _ Christ, _ Tina.” Gavin shrugged her off. “Don’t get all sappy on me  _ now, _ huh?” He headed to his fridge and knelt in front of it as he browsed its contents. “Is there, like, anything specific you want?”

Tina shook her head as she came up beside him, leaning on the fridge’s door. “Just whatever you’re willing to part with.”

After a handful of seconds searching, Gavin pulled out a box of leftover pasta and held it up to Tina. “This okay?”

Tina took the box and popped it open to inspect the food within. “Yeah, actually.”

“What’s with that tone? You think I was gonna give you shit food?”

“No! Well….” Tina held back a laugh. “I just mean that it looks good. Where’d you get it from?”

Gavin hefted himself to his feet and closed the fridge, then snagged the box back from Tina so he could toss it in the microwave. “Nines made it.” 

A joke hung in the air while Gavin’s shoulders drew together, tight, tighter, anxieties worming their way into his chest. 

“ _ Damn. _ I wish  _ I _ could learn things perfectly in seconds.” Tina let out a wistful sigh, and Gavin let his body relax. She wasn’t like that. She was never like that. “I’ve been trying to get my mini pizzas  _ just _ right, but there’s always something wrong! What the hell am I doing wrong?”

Gavin leaned back against the counter and drew his hand to his chin, thoughtful. “Maybe you’re just a shit cook.”

“Okay,  _ damn,  _ Gav. Have some faith in me, why don’t you?” Tina huffed, pointing an accusing finger at him. “When’s the last time you cooked, huh? God. I’ll show your stupid ass; we’re having mini pizzas tonight.” 

“Oh no,” Gavin trilled with a slow roll of his eyes. “What ever will I do?  _ Me, _ a healthy person, eating such unhealthy food?”

Tina couldn’t help a snort. “Shut it, dumbass, you should be  _ lucky _ I’m allowing you to have such a treat.” With a shake of her head, she added, “Aren’t you gonna eat anything?”

Gavin pursed his lips, then moved to rifle through his cabinets. “Somethin’ small,” was all he gave in response. He wasn’t sure if he could stomach anything more. 

“Shit!” Gavin stumbled back as Jo leapt at him and latched onto his shoulder. He steadied her with a broken gasp. “So  _ that’s _ where you’d gotten to. Jesus, fuckin’ cat.” With Jo settled down, he reached for a granola bar and worked it open with his teeth. 

“Christ, you animal.” Tina sighed and took out her reheated pasta when the microwave went off. “I’m gonna eat this in the car, I took too long grabbing all my shit. Speaking of,” she said, snatching a fork from Gavin’s sparse silverware drawer, “why the hell did you skip out on coming into work this morning?” 

Gavin let out a groan as he pulled Jo off his shoulders and placed her on the floor to take the granola bar from his mouth. “Fuck off, Fowler said I could come in whenever.” 

“Oh? Yeah, yeah, sure. You think I don’t know bullshit when I see it?” Tina shook her head with a laugh, and, moments later, the amusement drained from her face when her gaze caught on the prosthetic on the coffee table. “Come on. We’re gonna be late.” She looked Gavin up and down. “Well,  _ I _ might. You’re like, hours late.” 

“Oh my God, just go, then.” Gavin started to go to the door, but hesitation took ahold of his legs, stopping him in his tracks. He spun on his heel and dashed off to his bedroom, slipping off Nines’ jacket and laying it on a…cleaner area of the sheets. Damn, he’d have to wash them when he got back. 

When Gavin came running back out, he did his best to hide his face from Tina’s shit-faced grin. “Well?” 

“Oh, nothing, nothing. You gonna grab your…?”

Gavin sucked in a sharp inhale. “Shit, right.” He fumbled to reattach his plate and prosthetic, all the while pushing through the lingering doubt, the prickling realization, from everything yesterday. The jolt as plastic and flesh reconnected almost felt natural, familiar. Gavin just wished there was a message on the other end. 

Gavin led Tina out, waving goodbye to Jo before locking up behind them. They rode in Tina’s car in a relative silence that walked the line between comfortable and restless, the radio playing its tunes in the background, a low murmur of a too-catchy song. Gavin had to resist humming along. 

“Are—are you okay?” Tina’s voice cut through the noise, quiet as her words were, soft as the music was. 

Gavin didn’t answer for a long enough time that it almost felt…wrong to reply. He weighed the options in his head, back and forth and back and forth, then gulped and shoved the tension aside. “I don’t know,” he said. “But I gotta force myself to be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god, i love tina so much. kamski who?


End file.
